


Backstage

by MitchNovak23



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Car Accident, Classic Rock, Description of Injuries, F/M, Fluff, Hospitalization, John Winchester's A+ Parenting, Journalist Dean, Love, M/M, Music, Nightmares, Nobody Dies, Recreational Drug Use, Rock Stars, Sex Drugs and Rock and Roll, Singer Castiel, Slow Burn, Slurs, Smut, Swearing, Switch Castiel, Switch Dean, Tattoos
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-08
Updated: 2018-12-29
Packaged: 2019-09-14 12:36:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 33
Words: 48,619
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16913022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MitchNovak23/pseuds/MitchNovak23
Summary: Castiel Novak is becoming an internationally loved front man with his rock band, The Rebellion Garrison, made up of his brothers. Cas is a smooth, ladies man that can have anyone screaming for more whether it's with his voice or something else.~ ~ ~Dean Winchester is a rising star in the world of journalism. He is extremely modest about his work but will stand up for what he sees as right. Dean has just been set his biggest challenge of his writing career.Both of them have secrets that they would rather keep to themselves.This is a re-upload from a different account! - Just FYI.





	1. Working into the Night

**ROCK STAR NOVAK ARRESTED – _STORY BY DEAN WINCHESTER_**

_Castiel Novak, The lead singer with the rock band The Rebellion Garrison, has been formally charged and arrested for driving under the influence of alcohol and possible illegal substances. It is to be believed that Mr Novak was racing his older brothers and band mates, Gabriel and Michael Novak when they passed a state trooper. Castiel – 26 – was seen driving his Mercedes at 2:33 am on Thursday morning at an approximate speed of 109 MPH in a 70 MPH zone. The other two Novak brothers have only been charged with speeding as a first offense. However, this is Castiel’s third Arrest in the last two years after the family band reached a new level of popularity during a tour of Europe and Australia with their third studio album, Let Me Go. However, it has not been all rosy for the Novak’s as their brother – Luci – left the band approximately 6 months ago for undisclosed reasons. As an exclusive, we are lead to believe that Luci left the band after several altercations with the eldest of the Novak siblings. Michael; who had been managing The Rebellion Garrison until Michael also left. In his absence, Balthazar Roche has taken over the management of The Rebellion Garrison. The band had also gained a surprisingly loyal fan base after the release of their second album, Call My Name which followed their debut album, Say Hello! Singer Magazine is currently waiting for a comment about this incident from Balthazar Roche._

Dean leaned back into his leather chair, examining his work closely. Although, he had only been working as a music journalist for the last 8 months; he took a tremendous amount of pride in any article he was instructed to write. It had been difficult learning basically a new trade after several years of being a local newspaper reporter.  
Now, his work could be read in one of the biggest Gossip magazines of them all. Singer’s. It had been quite a surprise when Dean had first received the e-mail from Bobby Singer, the owner of Singer’s magazine (Obviously.) Ever more of a surprise when Bobby offered him a job writing for the music section; so much so that Dean nearly broke his knee jumping from his chair in excitement.

He glanced up at the clock on the wall and groaned in frustration when it read ‘3:20am.’ Dean normally liked to work later than most of the other journalists but today was Friday and he was too tired to care anymore about the antics of one Castiel Novak. The information was sent straight to his department as soon as the police had officially charged Mr Novak and Dean needed to quickly write a short article about Castiel’s ever increasing arrest record. “He’ll still be insane in the morning” Dean mumbled to himself on the way out of the rather large building. Luckily for him, Dean only lived three blocks away from the offices and the walk from work took no longer than 15 minutes. A fact that he was always going to be thankful for, especially on mornings after a "catch up" with Sam which always ended in both of the Winchester boys drinking too much and reeking of stale beer for the next three days. 

His apartment was rather a mess. Stacks of books and scattered papers littered his floor or, frankly, any space that was available. But Dean still seemed to manage to live an organised life with such an uncontrolled chaos waiting for him at home. Dean had been meaning to clean his papers but, unfortunately, his work hours got in the way of any spare time. Anyway, his younger brother Sammy used to make do most of the cleaning when he lived with Dean. But, since Sam moved in with his girlfriend - Jess - the housework at Dean's apartment has been pretty much ignored or forgotten.

As soon as his shoes were off and his front door was locked, Dean collapsed onto his sofa and fell straight asleep. Despite the fact Dean worked late most nights, it was rare that he did not have the energy to even make it to his own bed and undress himself. Tonight was different. His energy levels had been completely drained and Dean desperately needed sleep even if it meant sleeping on the world’s most uncomfortable sofa. Although, his slumber didn’t last long. His phone began to ring as loud as it possibly could of, awakening a rather grumpy Dean.

“What?”

He croaked down the phone. Dean was half-expecting it to be Sam or maybe Benny, asking if he come over for a beer and a chat as Andrea threw him out again. 

“Dean. Hello. It’s Bobby”

Instantly, he sat bolt upright and scrubbed the sleep out of his eyes.  _Crap._ A thousand thoughts about what his boss could have wanted from him began to run through his mind. 

“Oh… Hello. Sorry Mr Singer”

“Dean. Please. Call me Bobby, Mr Singer makes me sound older. Anyway, I got a job for you Boy…”

“Sure anything Bobby”

“Well. I want you to write a special addition of Singer’s for me”

The line went completely silent as Dean tried to register what Bobby was asking of him.

“Are… Are you sure Bobby?”

“Of course I am Dean. I know you haven’t been around as long as some of the others but you have the skills they don’t that are needed for this task”

Dean was shocked. _Was this actually happening?_ Bobby wanted him to write a whole edition of Singer’s. He had been completely unaware that Bobby was still talking down the phone.

“Yes! I mean… Of course I would love to”

“That is great to hear Dean. We can talk over the finer details in my office tomorrow morning as soon as you get in. Right. Get some sleep now. Goodbye Dean.”

“Goodbye and Thank you Bobby.”

After they had both hung up, Dean had an enormous grin on his face. His exhaustion was replaced with a rush of adrenaline. Dean was going to lead the production of an entire issue. Holy shit. Dean had been working at Singer's Magazine for nearly two years now as the music correspondence but this was going to be the first time that he was handed the reins on a bigger responsibility, not to say that he didn't  _love_ working the smaller stories that he was handed on a nearly daily basis. He has pawed over the countless number of conspiracy theories about Kurt Cobain or the evidence of the never-ending bitchiness of Taylor Swift for hours upon hours. However, finally, Dean was going to have a project that he could completely focus on. He quickly tapped out a text to Sam, explaining that he would be missing their weekly cup of coffee together before dragging himself off to bed and finally fell into a comfortable slumber.


	2. Good News or Bad News

Dean scrubbed his face and nearly broke his jaw with a over exaggerated yawn as he leaned against the wall of the elevator. Early mornings was not his thing. Bobby's late night phone call had put ideas into Dean's head of what story or who he could cover for the magazine. Maybe Jeff Lynne. Or Eric Clapton. He would scream if he got the chance to meet and talk to Brian Johnson. He didn't get that much sleep after waking up wondering who Bobby had in mind and this 8:30am start on a Saturday was not agreeing with him off the bat.  _8:30am. Too fucking early._

Sadly, he got pulled out of his sleepy daydreaming when the elevator stopped with a rather loud ding on the 33rd floor of the Singer's building. Dean manages to drag himself through the busy office and taps on Bobby's office door. Now that he was here, standing outside Bobby's office. He was nervous. Dean knocked again until he heard rough voice say "Come in..." Bobby had his head raised and smile on his face as Dean peered around the door. He quickly shut it behind him and took the empty chair opposite Bobby.

Even though, Bobby was the head of one of the most popular magazines in the Western World, he didn't act like any of it mattered at all. He usually says "Running a company as big as this is like running a family. There are going to be disagreements but you get the job done no matter what." Dean idolized the way Bobby worked. He was blunt, stubborn but everyone seemed relaxed around him. Bobby was a strong man that didn't take excuses for badly written work so everyone tried to ensure that their pieces were always the highest quality and he always seemed to appreciate their work ethics. 

His office reflected the priorities in Bobby's life. Across the walls, there were several different car inspired artwork and pictures of his family. His wife, Ellen, Dean has met numerous times. She is just as stubborn and blunt as Bobby but there was a warmth to her that made Dean like her instantly. Still, he often wondered about Ellen's first marriage and if her first husband was like Bobby or if he was completely different. The result of her marriage to the mysterious Harvelle was Ellen's daughter, Joanna Beth. She was another story altogether. Her loud mouth and complete disregard for any kind of boundaries had landed Jo into more hot water than either Bobby or Ellen would care to mention. Despite the fact that Jo had the vocabulary of a sailor; she could be caring and warm, Rather much like Ellen. One minute they could be tearing you a new one and the next, they could be hugging you and baking pie. It was a slightly scary flip. 

"So Dean..."

Dean shook his head as he hadn't realized how far into his own thoughts he had gotten. He smiles across the desk at Bobby

"Mr Singer, I can't believe this. I mean, I haven't been here all that long and..."

Bobby raised his hand to stop Dean from continuing and he quickly shutting his mouth to stop anymore words from spilling out. It never did anyone any good if they started to speak out of turn in the presence of their boss. 

"Like I said last night Dean. Call me Bobby and I need your communication skills. You can talk to people, Boy. I mean really talk to them and that is what this assignment needs."

"Sure. Awesome. So, what is the assignment?"

"Well" Bobby leans forward slightly in his chair "The Rebellion Garrison. Heard of them?"

Dean nodded his head with a quiet scoff. At this point, he didn't think that anyone hadn't heard of the band of brothers or their stupid antics. 

"Sure. The Novak brothers band. The ones giving Keith Moon a run for his money. What about them?"

"That's who I want the special edition on. Well, that leader singer of theirs. Castiel. You up for it?"

Dean's brain short circuited. Had he just said...? Does Bobby really want him to interview that maniac? When he could be interviewing someone like Robert Plant. Seriously? He looked up at Bobby and remembered he hadn't answered him

"Awesome. That is a shock. Um... Of course I'm up for it."

"You sure Boy? Just say and I can give it to Lisa or someone"

"No! Of course I'm sure Bobby. So, how will it work? I collect information from band mates, former girlfriends and then do an interview with the guy?"

"Not exactly Dean. You see, I want you to write about what this guy is actually like of the stage. I reckon he ain't such an Idjit really. So, you are gonna spend the next eight months on tour with him and his band."

"Awesome. Really appreciate the challenge Bobby"

"You should Boy. Now, Go home and get some rest. You look like you've been to Hell and back. We'll talk about the finer details on Monday morning."

Now, Dean's brain had really stopped working. He was still trying to understand what Bobby had told him when Bobby carefully ushered hi out of his office and Dean somehow got back to the elevator. _Crap_. He leaned heavily on the wall of the elevator. Dean had been hopefully and excited on the journey up this morning with ideas buzzing around his head. But, now, he was anxious and disappointed. Dean slowly rubbed circles into his temples as he could feel the mother of all headaches beginning to brew at the back of his skull. Eight fucking months with the Novak clan. 

"This is not going to turn out well."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as always for reading, my Darlings. 
> 
> Please leave any comments below.  
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	3. Rock Doesn't Always Roll

Cas threw his head back as he practically screamed the final note of the evening. It had been one of the longest sets that The Rebellion Garrison had performed together. Exhilarating but exhausting. Cas had slowly become accustomed to longer and longer sets; thanks to Balthazar. But this was ridiculous. Things had been different when Michael was in charge. "Leave them wanting more, Castiel." That was his exact words. "They will come back again." All of the brothers lived by Michael's word; as if they believed that he was god himself. However, everything changed when he left. Firstly, Michael refused to even speak to Castiel or any other Novak sibling. But things had slowly been getting back to some form of normality.

His hair had turned oily black in color with sweat and plastered itself in inconvenient angles upon Castiel’s forehead. Castiel shook his head as if to rid his mind of the distracting thoughts. Not now. He grinned like the Cheshire Cas to the audience, taking one final bow and bid his farewells for the night. Cas watched as each of his brothers took a step forward and said their goodnights to the audience as well. Although, he enjoyed performing, Cas still felt relieved when he can finally rush off the stage and relax in the back of their tour bus. Tonight was no different. As soon as Cas smelt the familiar scent of stale beer and Gabriel's noxious shoes; he instantly relaxed back into the seat. "Thank fuck for that." The peace was short lived. Not long after Castiel had gotten comfortable, the remaining band members filed quickly into their designated areas of the bus. Gabriel - of course - was the first to start tearing into any food he could find; shortly followed by Samandriel and one Meg Masters.

The only current member of The Rebellion Garrison to not be an official Novak but she was certainly making up for that fact. She began playing guitar for the band when Balthazar took over management and during an exceedingly quick relationship with Cas. That was an embarrassing and slightly awkward decision but there was no hatred between Cas and Meg now because of that. Although, every once in a while, Meg will happily admit that she wish she could of had one more ride of Cas before calling it a day. On the other hand, Castiel was extremely pleased that they had ended their... whatever you wish to call it. _"Agreement."_ He began to realize that he did not share the same feelings as Meg harbours for him.

"So Caaaaaaassie..."

Gabriel slipped into the empty seat beside Castiel with a lollipop indelicately shoved in his mouth. The older Novak sibling was rarely seen without some kinda of candy and Castiel was surprised that he had teeth left, his reliance on sugar was staggering. Even since they were younger, Gabriel had this strange need to have something sweet at all times and this weird addiction could, possibly, explain the constant tapping of his feet or fingers against any surface. 

"What is it Gabriel?"

"Well. I know you like leaving straight after a gig but seriously. You're making us look like Douche nuggets."

"Douche nuggets?"

"Yeah with the whole Mysterious asshole routine you have going on."

"Gabriel. I have a reputation to uphold and if that means people sees the band as... Douche nuggets, then that is how it shall be"

"You obviously haven't spoken to Balthy today, have you?"

"Why? What is happening?"

At that moment, the door to the tour bus was flung wide open and the man himself, Balthazar, sauntered through the isle. He was not an exceptionally tall man but Balthazar had a slightly bizarre presence about him. One of flamboyancy and laziness wrapped up in a layer of sarcasm. He flashed a quick smile in the direction of the others before settling down across from Cas and Gabriel; completely ignoring the confused look on both of their faces.

“Balthazar, what is going on? Why is Gabe asking me to tone things down on stage?”

Balthazar reached into his pocket to retrieve his phone. He continued to speak towards Castiel but his eyes were firmly locked on the small screen.

"Oh yes. Cassie Darling. We are going to be having a visitor so you gotta start playing nice"

Castiel's jaw dropped open. A visitor? Play Nice? Thoughts spun around his head until he began to feel slightly dizzy. They had begun their current tour sometime last month and never before had Cas had visitors he had to "play nice" with before on any tour. He was curious but anxious of who exactly this visitor will be and what they want.

"A V-visitor?... Who? Why? When?"

"His name is Dean Winchester. He is some kind of journalist from Singer's magazine. They are printing a special edition all about you and the poor bastard has the joy of spending the next 8 months of the tour."

"8 months?! I can barely stand to be around anyone for that amount of time but some guy I don't know who is going to be prodding and probing me for information for some glam rag. No Balthazar, I can't do it."

"Well, little too late Cassie. I ironed out the details with Mr Bobby Singer himself during the gig. We're picking Dean up on our way through Missouri and that is that."

Castiel huffed and mumbled several curses as he turned his head to stare out of the window. No matter how much he protests about Balthazar's decisions, Cas still had to follow them through until the end. If not, Balthy would not hesitate in firing his ass for some bimbo who thinks she can get away with a bad voice by shaking her hips or anything else to keep the audience distracted. No. Cas loved his music too much to let that happen to the band. Even if it does mean listening to Balthazar and his stupid ideas. He leaned his forehead against the cooler glass of the window; the rhythmic vibrations helped soothe Castiel's approaching migraine. He led a privileged life but sometimes, it made Cas unhappy.

Extremely unhappy. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, my Lovelies. 
> 
> Please leave any comments in the comment-y part.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	4. First Impressions - Part One

It was official. Dean Winchester hated early mornings. He nearly smashed the alarm clock as it reminded him that it was only 4:30am. **Fuck.** If Dean wasn’t needed to be awake and ready to leave at 7am, it was certain that he would still be deep somewhere in dream land. Eventually, Dean rolled himself out of his bed and shuffled his way to the bathroom. It wasn’t long until Dean was awake enough to safely pour himself a cup of coffee and not spill it everywhere. _Coffee was too precious in the mornings to waste._

After pulling on a faded pair of jeans and his beloved Metallica shirt; Dean wandered back into his bedroom, eyeing his suitcase at the bottom of his bed. He lifted it onto the edge of the mattress and thoroughly checked through it to ensure that he had packed enough clothes for his extended stay with The Rebellion Garrison. Dean had a small carry-on packed with his writing equipment. _Notebooks, pens, tape recorders, etc..._ It had taken three days after he received the news for Dean to begin sorting through the piles of papers to find the appropriate things to take along with him. 

It was difficult for Dean to decide not to back out of this one. But Bobby was counting on him to get the job done; even if it did mean living with Castiel Novak for eight months. Eight Months. He had heard horror stories and legends about what happened on their tour bus. That lunatic Novak had made more headlines than Tony Iommi (Dean was sure of it.) Sex, Drugs and Rock and Roll. The whole nine yards. Dean could have guessed why people liked the guy so much; Castiel was absolutely gorgeous. With his nearly permanent sex hair and his ridiculously blue eyes. Not that Dean would ever admit that to anyone in his whole life. Not even Sammy. Fuck! What had Dean gotten himself in for?

He glanced at his wall clock. **6:15am.** Dean started to pace, running down a mental list to make sure he had packed everything that he needed. He was not ready for this. Dean had never been on tour before. The longest time that he had been on the road was 3 weeks and that was a badly planned road trip with Sam 4 years ago. But this was for 8 months. 243 days. 5832 hours. Most of which were going to be spent in a cramped bus with a maniac and his band of loony siblings. Dean had done some research about each member of the Rebellion Garrison to understand the band a little better but the constant reports of their practical jokes and brushes with the law didn't sit well in his stomach, especially the stories that he, himself, had to write about them. 

6:50 am. Shit. Shit. Shit. This was actually happening. In approximately 10 minutes, Dean was going to be joining Castiel Novak on tour. He quickly organised his cases beside the front door but the mundane task did not help in soothing his nerves. Dean’s stomach had decided to practice some impressive gymnastic moves and make him feel 100% worse. Dean kept pacing from the front door back through the living room then into his bedroom. The repetitive motion seemed to calm him somewhat; but that completely changed when Dean heard a knock at the door.

He abruptly stopped in his tracks. Could he be imagining things? Dean remained quiet until a much louder knock was made. Fuck. _This was it._ He squashed every nervous feeling down into the pit of his stomach and calmly went to open his front door. Standing there was a man Dean recognized as Balthazar Roche. He was not short in stature but Dean had a couple inches advantage than Balthazar. His hair was a dirty blonde and was styled within an inch of its life. Dean had somehow zoned out again and was still staring at Balthazar.

“Dean Winchester?”  
  
“Uh… Yeah. Sorry, that’s me. You must be Balthazar Roche, right?”  
  
"That's right. I’ve come to take you to the hotel where Cassie and the rest of them are staying for now.”  
  
"Oh..." Dean raised his eyebrows in slight surprise and confusion "I-I thought we were going to be staying on a bus?"  
  
Balthazar grinned "You sure are but we gotta stock up on some essentials before we drive to the next round of gigs."  
  
Dean blushed slightly in embarrassment "Right. Sure. Umm... Maybe we should get going... Sooner we start...the better..."  
  
"Sure thing. Just load your stuff in the back of the car and we'll be on our way..."

Arranging Dean's luggage into the back of Balthazar's car was not as difficult or time consuming as either of them had believed. The ride to the hotel in Kansas City was pretty much uneventfully. Dean had considered jumping out of the moving car and running away at several points but he was afraid of disappointing Bobby in such a way. He had worked too damn hard for Bobby’s approval to ruin his reputation now because of being too nervous. Balthazar must have been able to tell that Dean was nervous as hell about this assignment. Although he was talking directly to Dean, Balthazar kept his eyes firmly glued on the road.

“Right. First things first. Don’t piss Cassie off. He is hard enough to work with when he is a good mood. It is nearly impossible to get him to pay attention to anything important if someone has gotten him into a foul mood.”

Dean simply nodded. He had read and even written about Castiel Novak’s famous temper and the consequences of getting on the wrong side of him. It was not nice. He remembered one story in which Castiel had fired a young roadie for not leaving during the band’s pre-show rehearsal. It would be a miracle if Dean could survive without getting into a fight with him.

”When I was talking about this with your boss, he warned me that you may be stupidly stubborn over the way in which you write this article or whatever. Castiel can be just as stubborn as you, Green eyes so don’t try to make him do anything he says no to. Things like talking about his parents. Do. Not. Bring them up. Too much water under the bridge if you get my drift.”

That was a subject on the top of Dean’s question list. Despite the success of the Novak brothers; no one really knew anything about their family background. He had heard comments from Michael that "All the family they had was in the band." It still seemed strange - to Dean at least - that a group of relatives that were forever in the public eye could be extremely secretive. He shook his head as Balthazar began to speak again.

"Finally, have fun. It's not often that Cassie lets people on our tours. Despite the busy look of things back stage, touring can be really fun. So, please enjoy it but... Don't go to the extremes that the other guys go to at the after parties. They believe they are immortal but everyone else knows far better than them and I think you know you're not immortal like those ass-munches do."

The speech from Balthazar had weirdly calmed Dean's stomach and eased the surging thoughts in his head. Dean felt more relaxed with what was planned for the next couple of months even if it did mean living in close quarters with a mad man. He could do it knowing Balthazar knew what Castiel's behaviours were and how to - hopefully - handle him. Time slowly passed away and it was not long before the car was pulling out in front of the Hotel Phillips.

The demeanour of the hotel was grand and all of a sudden Dean felt very out of place as he walked in through the rotating doors. Balthazar quickly s filled them both into the elevator and pressed the button for the top floor. Dean’s stomach began to flip again but he breathed deep to keep his nervousness at bay. Finally, the elevator doors opened into a luxurious suite that was painted completely white. Somewhere, Dean could hear some fainting noises that sounded like someone snoring. Balthazar pulled him into the main bedroom. This room was also lavishly decorated but lacked any colour whatsoever. Dean's eyes were ripped away from the art upon the walls as he heard soft footsteps on the laminated flooring of the bedroom.

"Who the fuck are you?"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comment in the comment part below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	5. First Impressions - Part Two

It was a tremendous relief when Castiel finally reached the hotel at 5am; he was about to murder Gabriel in several different horrifying ways.  _Balthazar would give him a credible alibi._  Cas quickly dashed through the rather crowded lobby of the hotel to ensure that no one had the chance to recognize him or ask him for an autograph. Although this industry had been kind to Cas in the past, lately, it had started to become more and more difficult to have any kind of normality in his life and Castiel hated the lack of rest time in between gigs. Before. they would get a week off after 5 weeks of touring, to ensure they didn't go mad or kill any other member. That was when Michael was manager. Michael believed in the band being as rested as possible and Castiel enjoyed touring with his brothers. Balthazar - on the other hand - liked pushing them to their physical and mental limits. It was surprising that Castiel hadn't snapped under the constant pressure yet.

Castiel leaned heavily against the elevator wall as the doors close shut. _Thank fuck for that._ He let his eyes shut in the comfort that there was no one else in the lift that could disturb him. He was suddenly overcome with a wave of complete exhaustion. It had been nearly a week since they had been able to spend a night in a hotel instead of the dingy tour bus. The thought of being able to sleep in a clean bed without your older brother trying to put rice pudding in both of your shoes or writing extremely rude words on his forehead in permanent marker was practically heaven in this precise moment of time. It was as if Gabriel was a hyperactive puppy that needed attention 24/7 or he'll rip up your favourite pair of slippers and pee on the carpet.  _Although Gabriel has actually urinated on the floor in the past, Castiel believed that it would be rather insulting to put newspaper down for him._

The doors opened with a soft 'ding' and Castiel pushed himself away from the back wall of the lift. Along the first walls of the penthouse were several pieces of modern art and a few famous pieces of impressionist art as well. Cas stopped to admire a few of the creations before wandering through to the massively spacious living room. The walls were painted a pearl white and had more unusual artwork adorning the other walls.

"An extremely bland and boring taste of décor for such an expensive room." Castiel thought to himself.

He enjoyed staying places that are more characteristic than this but Balthazar always booked the most ostentatious room available. He would be much happier if he was sharing a room with Samandriel or even, Gabriel.  _Depending on whether his brother had been drinking or not.._ That was the other side of the coin about touring life; Castiel hated spending time on the bus but he absolutely loved having some downtime with his siblings, even Lucifer when he was touring, the fun and games was always better when there was someone there to share in it. 

The beds in the hotel rooms were always too big and cold with only him in it. Even if Castiel did have some company for the night- _which is rarer than people think_ \- they would sleep separately or simply leave before falling asleep. They would not hold each other through the night; share in each other's warmth. Everything about this life was getting colder and colder. Castiel wished that he had someone that he could share his bed with night after night. Someone who could see behind the stupid façade that had been built around him and love him for simply being him. Not the asshole who was leaping about a stage for hours at a time and then partying until the dawn. But, just him. Castiel James Novak.

He shuffled his way into the bedroom, stripping all of his clothes and leaving them haphazardly strewn across the floor. Cas crawled under the covers; shivering slightly at how cold the sheets felt against his naked form. _One day, my bed won't be this cold._ He glanced over at the clock on the nearest beside table. **5:30am.** _Shit._ How the hell had it taken him half an hour to simply get into bed? It had been a long trip through Iowa to get to Kansas City. Castiel – of course – did not sleep a minute of the entire journey, thanks to Gabriel flicking his ear each time Cas allowed his own eyes to fall close.  _Another good reason to add to the ever increasing "Why I killed Gabriel" list._

Nevertheless, he was here, in his bed. Alone. Anyone would of thought that Castiel would fall asleep immediately due to the exhaustion tugging at the far reaches of his consciousness. _Not the case_. Cas tried repeatedly to allows himself to fall asleep but he couldn't. His mind kept focusing on the large empty space next to him instead of shutting off any distracting thoughts. He physically shook his head to attempt to erase the thoughts from his brain. Castiel was missing someone in his life to fill that space in his bed and his brain had the brilliant idea of dragging all of his lonesome thoughts to the surface now. Right this second. Cas pulled a spare pillow over his face and willed the thoughts away.  _Please. I just want to sleep._ The pleading with himself didn't elevate any of the loneliness that sat heavily in the middle of his chest.  

He tried to shift his thoughts about everything to distract himself from the excess of empty space next to him. Cas thought about the 18th century composer Joseph Gibbs and Rainbow's concert in Dusseldorf in 1976. The memory of Dio's voice singing 'Catch the Rainbow' had lulled Cas into a soft dozing state as he became sleepier and sleepier. He must have fallen asleep for a short period of time as he was rudely awoken by the sound of Balthazar talking rather loudly to someone by the entrance of the hotel room.  _Assbutt._ Balthazar had no real understanding about boundaries or understanding about the need for sleep - a major factor to his possible caffeine addiction. 

Castiel groaned quietly as he stole a glance at the clock. **7:50 am.** _For fuck sake_. It was still way too early for Cas to even contemplate getting out of bed on most days. But, he still dragged his ass out of bed and padded his way out into the main living space of the room. He was not worried about Balthazar seeing him naked. Balthy had seen Cas in the buff more times than he would care to admit to. However, he was halted in his tracks when he spotted a man in his room that was definitely not Balthazar. He hair was slightly darker and his face was adorned with a large amount of freckles. His eyes. _Fuck_. His eyes were so green that Cas thought they must of been fake and the man was wearing coloured contacts.  _That was the only explanation for the Disney Princess eyes._

Only after a couple of awkward moments staring at the man did Castiel realized that he was a complete stranger - a rather gorgeous one indeed - and Cas was still naked. If he was fully awake then Cas might have felt slightly embarrassed but, having only woken up a few minutes before, Castiel's brain was in autopilot. The snarled words had left his mouth before his mind truly caught up with what he was saying to the man standing in front of him. 

"Who the fuck are you?..."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks so much for reading, my Darlings. 
> 
> Leave any comments below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS  
> Ps. I realised that they are a bunch of mistakes whilst reuploading the earlier chapters so please keep in mind that I will be editing everything once the basic plot/story is done. Thank you!


	6. Treading on Egg Shells

Dean’s jaw dropped instantly as his eyes landed on a very naked Castiel Novak. _Shit._ He is fucking gorgeous. Dean allowed his eyes to scan the somewhat aggravated figure that was standing before him. The same figure that he had seen being pulled out of cars by police officers and a figure he had watched leaping around a stage whilst singing an impossible note perfectly. It was no secret that Castiel Novak was considered attractive to anyone who had working eyesight but Dean never thought that he would be encountering him whilst the singer was sans clothing. The corner of Dean's mouth lifts up shyly at the extremely messy mop of hair that was adorned on top of Castiel's head, a few separate strands sticking up on their own accord. Dean glanced further down from Castiel’s face, the broad but slim panels of his chest and down further to the sharp jut of his hips bones. He bit at his bottom lip as he noticed a path of dark, fine hair leading down to Castiel's... Holy fuck. Dean snapped his eyes back up to the singers face with a blush rising in his cheeks as he realized he had been staring and hadn't answered him yet.

"Uh... I-I... I'm D-dean... Dean Winchester..."

 _Really smooth Winchester._ Dean mentally face-palms himself. How could one guy get him so jittery in the blink of an eye? Well, the answer was simple, that guy was Castiel Novak. Sexy, mysterious Castiel Novak. He shook his head trying to rid his mind of all ridiculous thoughts about Castiel, his damn near perfect body and his permanent bed head that should not be sexy at any time. Shaking his head did not help at all, when Dean looked back to that spot in front of him; Castiel was still standing there and was still naked. He smirks shyly at Cas as he lets his eyes drop again to study a tattoo just above singer's left hip. Dean couldn't distinguish any of the individual letters but the black ink stood out on Castiel's paler skin. Dean straightened his back anxiously as he noticed that Castiel was studying Dean’s body just as intently as he had been staring at that strange tattoo. Dean licks his bottom lip subconsciously, as his eyes trail down further to Castiel’s runner like thighs. He had seen photos of the singer naked before - _Thank you Internet -_ but this was different. Castiel could actually witness Dean staring at the defined lines of muscle and he could see the blush rising in his cheeks. A cough snapped Dean back to reality; he twisted around to see Balthazar standing with his hands on his hips and a very disapproving look on his face. Dean dropped his head in embarrassment and a slight blush creeps up his neck into his cheeks. Balthazar completely bypasses Dean and stood in front of Castiel.

“Cassie! Why the hell aren’t you dressed? I told you yesterday that we were meeting Mr Winchester this morning. Stop giving me the stink eye too, it isn’t that early”

Balthazar waved a hand dismissively as Castiel tried to speak. Maybe things weren’t so sweet between these two, Dean thought as he watched quietly behind both of them. He had believed that Castiel and Balthazar was as close as brothers but now; perhaps he was wrong. Perhaps everything was not Sunsets and Unicorns with these two. Dean would have to ask Castiel about his relationship with Balthazar later on when his manager is not in earshot. This assignment could actually be more interesting that Dean imagined in the first place.

“I don’t want to hear any excuses. Just get the dressed and meet us down in the foyer in 10 minutes.”

Before Dean could even register what was happening; Balthazar was dragging him back into the elevator whilst looking at his phone at the same time. It seemed that Mr Roche was incredible multitasking but – _then again_ – he was the manager of an internationally famous rock band. He ran a hand through his hair, wondering if he had just fucked up their first meeting by ogling at Castiel like that. _Well, it could have been worse, Sammy could have been there._ Dean glanced over to Balthazar but the man was more engrossed with the messages that he was receiving on his mobile phone. In his research, Dean had found very little information about Mr. Roche apart from an old interview when Michael first left the band and Balthazar took over, stating that nothing about the band or the music that they create would change under his management. 

Dean shook his head trying to calm his heart that was leaping in his chest. He had to remain professional from now on if he was going to get the kind of information that Bobby expected him to get. Crap Bobby. Dean would definitely get fired if Bobby ever found out that he turned into a nervous teenage girl when he met Castiel Novak. He could not get fired because of a little, _slight_ crush on the guy that he is going to be interviewed for a very high-end magazine. Dean loved his job too much. _Get it together Winchester._ From here on out, Dean was not going to gawk or stare or gape on every occasion that he saw Castiel. The elevator pinged as they reached the ground level of the hotel, the doors opening into the expansive foyer. Dean took a deep breath before following Balthazar to one of the several sofas spread throughout the vast room. His eyes scanning the foyer until they landed back on the elevator doors as a rather grumpy – but now dressed – Castiel emerging from behind the automatic doors. Dean frowned at the dark expression that had narrowed Castiel's brow and his jaw set in place when the singer glanced over at him. 

Today was going to be a long day.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, Sweeties. 
> 
> Please leave any comments for me below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	7. Good Morning Princess

### Chapter Text

This is definitely not what Castiel thought he was going to awaken to when he rolled out of bed. A muscular, green-eyed stranger who was staring so hard at Cas that he was slightly concerned that his eyes would pop out of the unknown man’s head at any second. The sleep fog from his mind started to thin and ‘Stage Cas’ disappeared for the moment, the protective facade fading from his mind. He tilted his head slightly to the side as he waited for the man to answer him until he realized why he was staring so obviously. _Shit._ Castiel was completely naked. He never felt self-conscious about his body before – he had stripped once or twice an audience – but by the way a faint blush was rising in the stranger’s cheeks; Castiel began to wander if it was the first time this man had seen another man naked. It was a slight understatement to say that Cas had a nice body; he enjoyed running too much and keeping his thighs toned and his hips slim.

The man was talking, well, trying to talk. At last, Cas had a name to go with suck a well sculpted face. Dean Winchester. That was most certainly the reporter guy who Balthazar had told him about at some point yesterday. Castiel allowed his eyes to fall down the man's body; watching closely as he sees muscles shift beneath the stranger's clothes. His brain sparked into gear as he noticed that this Dean was wearing a faded Metallica shirt that had probably been extensively worn; maybe he was a fan like Cas. There was nothing more about the man's appearance that stood out to Cas; blue jeans and tattered work boots that were tapping anxiously on the floor. 

"Maybe this guy isn't going to be such an Assbutt" he thought to himself as his eyes drifted lower.

His gaze lingered on the man - _Dean_ \- as Cas tried to figure out how a man that looked similar to a Greek god could, also, have such bowed legs like a cowboy out of an old western film. Castiel was pulled back to Earth as he started to daydream about Dean in a cowboy outfit by an overly exaggerated cough. _For fuck sake_. He had just begun to enjoy the company of this journalist but – of course – Balthazar had other plans for this morning. Obviously. He rolled his eyes at the ridiculous sight of Balthy standing with his hands on his hips like he just caught Castiel doing something wrong. Cas narrowed his eyes at Balthy in an attempt to get the message that it was too early for his bullshit.

Balthazar had set rules about the type of people Castiel was allowed to see – in a personal capacity. No groupies, bimbos and certainly no men. It was not due to the fact that Balthazar was homophobic in any way; it was because Castiel – apparently - had a reputation as a ladies man to uphold. It was a stupid reputation. One that Castiel did not even know about until Balthazar took over as the manager and he started to suggest that Cas would stop seeing men due to the fan base being mainly of women.  _Cas had a suspicion that it was a part of the orders that Michael left for Balthazar before leaving completely._

His mind had drifted again and when he was brought back to reality; Balthazar was telling him to get dressed. Cas was not ready to be up and about at this time in the morning. It was way too damn early for him. Castiel opened his mouth to tell Balthy that there was no way in hell that he was getting up without his much needed forty winks. However, as usual Balthazar stopped him even before he even said a single word. He pouted in frustration at the truly rude way Balthazar talked to him at times. Castiel performed when he's told to, eats when he's told to and even sleeps when he gets told to by Balthazar. Any sane person would have thought that Balthazar would have some kind of respect for Cas and let him at least sleep a couple of hours. Nope. They would be totally wrong. It was a price that Cas had to pay to keep his other brother's happy and content but this was running him ragged.

Castiel trudged back to the bedroom as he heard the elevator doors arrive at their floor and - shortly after - leave again. The thought of just crawling back under the covers and completely ignoring his 'orders' was very tempting; but he knew he couldn't. Not unless he wanted a pissed off Balthazar for the rest of the tour. A whole 8 months of him being a bigger assbutt than usual. Castiel could barely tolerate Balthazar at the moment. He dragged his feet along the carpeted floors as he tried to find some clothes that were comfortable to wear and didn't have any buttons. Cas pulled on a pair of his black jeans and a oversized "University of Rock" hoodie that was the softest hoodie in the world.

The journey to the ground floor in the elevator was uneventful apart from Castiel nearly falling asleep against one of the walls but he was awoken by the "ding" when they reached the foyer. Everything was too bright and loud for this early in the morning. Cas groaned at the sunshine streaming through the large windows and doors at the front of the hotel. His eyes narrowed as he spotted Balthazar - with his phone stuck to his face - and Dean situated on one of the sofas. Castiel's mood lightened slightly when he finally flopped down into an armchair and he could relax before Balthazar started talking again.

He was in desperate need for a very large coffee or something more illegal if he was going to get through this morning. Cas kept his eyes closed with his head tilted back as he vaguely listened to Balthazar ramble on about Dean's contract and the method that he was going to interview Cas - or something like that. Castiel nodded occasional when Balthazar asked him anything. Surprisingly, Dean was remarkably quiet throughout their "meeting" but when Cas sneaked a peek of him through one eye; he swore he could see Dean's lips moving. Maybe his hearing was going, that would be a disaster if that was happening. Before Castiel could panic himself, he noticed that Dean was reading several pieces of paper. A small crease appeared between Dean's eyebrows as his eyes scanned the page. Shit, that should not be adorable. God knows what legal crap Balthazar had written into it if he had given Dean a contract that is anything like Castiel's and the bands. A major headache was threatening to brew at the very mention of their contract with Balthazar. It had taken nearly four months to complete and Cas doesn't agree with a great deal of what is needed of him. He rests an arm over his eyes to try and block out as much light as possible.

Fuck. This was going to be a long day

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as ever, for reading! 
> 
> Leave any comments for me below in the comment-y part.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	8. A Few Finer Details

Dean was trying his best to concentrate on Balthazar explaining the contract. But there were two major things distracting him. One; the major lack of coffee in his system. Two; the way Castiel kept staring at Dean out of the corner of his eye. Dean couldn't catch the singer directly staring at him but he could see Castiel crack an eye open at odd moments. He couldn't possible staring at Dean for any other reason that he was a stranger who had just gawked at the singer whilst he was completely naked. Could he? Nope. Definitely not. Maybe.

Dean tore his attention back to the contract that was in his hands. He flipped through the first few pages until he landed on the chapter detailing the access he got to the backstage areas of all the concerts that The Rebellion Garrison performed. The language that Balthazar had used was confusing to say the least; Dean could not decipher half of the conditions that were outlined. He could call Bobby and ask him to translate the legal garble for him but this was Dean's mission and Bobby had trusted him to complete it. So he will even if it does mean not knowing what his contract states. Dean watched as Balthazar stood from the other end of the sofa and leaving to fetch himself a coffee from the hotel restaurant.

“So any questions before you sell us your soul?”

The deep rumble of Castiel’s voice made Dean nearly jump off of the end of the leather sofa. His head was still tipped back and his eyes were still shut tightly. If anyone else looked at him now, they could easily believe that Castiel was fast asleep. He shook his head, realizing shortly after that Cas could not see him with his eyes shut. Dean cracked a weak smile at the Singer who had opened both of his eyes now to stare at Dean. Fuck. Castiel's eyes were so beautiful. They were bright with a glint of something that Dean couldn't describe in them. Dean subconsciously licked his lips as his throat suddenly stopped working and his tongue had gotten tied in his mouth.

"N-Not really... Um... Actually... Umm..."

"I do actually have plans today so please sometime this Century."

"Well, how much time am I going to be spending with you... without anyone else?"

That certainly got a reaction that Dean was not expecting from Castiel. Cas’s eyes widen immediately and a deep red blush appeared on the singer’s cheeks and went straight up to his ears. He opened and closed his mouth like Cas was struggling to find words to say. Had Dean just rendered Castiel - rock star with a serious attitude problem - speechless? Well, that was a turn out for the books but what was wrong with Dean's question?

"Are you okay?.. Wait... No... Crap"

Dean was going to get the word "Dumbass" tattooed across his forehead. He scrubbed a hand over his eyes, sighing in frustration at his own stupidity. His eyes were still heavier than usual and his brain was not working as quickly as it should be. Things would be going so much smoother if Dean had more coffee in his system than the single cup he had this morning.

“I-I didn’t mean it like that. I was wandering if I could spend some time with you without Balthazar or any of the others around. Just you and me talking about… whatever.”

Dean noticed a new emotion flash across Castiel's face. It was subtle but it was very clear to see. Disappointment. Was Castiel really disappointed that Dean didn't mean spending some quality time with him? There was no way in hell that he would be disappointed about that. Dean decided that it was too early from him to start reading in to this too much.

“Look, can we go and get some coffee? You look like you need it and I definitely need it to get this damn foot out of my mouth”

He was expecting Castiel to laugh and tell him to “stop being so stupid” or “Like I would with you.” Instead, Castiel grabbed his hand and dragged Dean through the lobby without a single word. Dean tripped over his own feet as Cas pulled him across the main road to a small café opposite. The singer didn’t speak until they had reached the glass door.

“Snuck out of my keeper’s sight yesterday and found this place. They do amazing blueberry muffins. Freshly baked and everything"

Dean couldn't help but stare at Castiel. The singer's whole demeanour had changed since Balthazar had disappeared in the vague direction of the Hotel's restaurant. Maybe Bobby was right all along and Castiel was a totally different person underneath everything else. They quickly found seats inside the small café, near a window facing out onto the street. Dean looked around the café, trying to figure out what drew Castiel to this one instead of one of the bigger chain coffee shops.

It was a simply café with several round tables scattered across the main floor. There was a large counter against one wall were people would order their food and drinks. He could hear an unknown radio station being played somewhere in the background. The atmosphere was easy and Dean instantly relaxed until a young girl brought two large coffees over with a fresh blueberry muffin on the side and a generous slice of cherry pie. Dean stared up in disbelief at Castiel – who simply stared back with a slight smile on his lips. He thanked the server and grins down at the plate in front of him.

“Dude. How did you do that? Did you phone a head or something?”   
“No. I have an agreement with the owner”   
“Since when?”   
“Yesterday. When I found this place. You don’t listen well for a reporter”

Dean smiles up at Castiel and shrugs his shoulders in a half attempted reply. He grins again down at the slice of pie before diving straight into eating the pie. Dean shameless groans as loud as he can around the first forkful of cherry filling and pastry. He glances up at Castiel and the singer is blushing again whilst staring wide-eyed at Dean. He puts his fork back down next to the plate and smiles shyly at Castiel as Dean wipes his mouth on a napkin.

"Sorry... I really like pie and... This is awesome pie"

The blush was still bright on Castiel’s cheeks and the very tips of his ears as he sips his cup of coffee tenderly. Dean could feel a similar blush starting to creep up his own cheeks. He had asked Castiel out on a whim and now they were sitting in a café, sipping coffee and Dean had just made the most embarrassing sound he could ever make. Dean had just made a fool of himself in front of the guy he would have to spend the next 8 months in close proximity with. Shit. He had made a mess of this already and now he would have to clean it up somehow.

"Now that I have officially put my foot in it, I thought I'd introduce myself a bit better than earlier in the hotel room. My name is Dean Winchester and I am the guy who is going to be following you around for the next 8 months. A couple of things you should probably know about me before we can even start working together. One; I hate flying. Be prepared for me getting drunk to get through flights. Two; I love pie and as you just saw, I really love Cherry pie. Finally, three; I am no pushover journalist. You have obviously been interviewed in the past but this is different. If I think you are holding out on me then I will push you until I get the answer that I feel is truthful. But if you give me a truthful answer and ask me specifically not to print it then I won’t. That is about all the basics you need to know really. Anything else you want to know?”

Dean couldn't risk a glance at Castiel as he started his speech, instead he concentrated on folding another napkin that was on the table. When he did look across at the Singer - napkin neatly folded beside his plate - Cas was staring back at him with his mouth hanging open. That was the second time Dean had left Castiel speechless. It was probably his confidence shining through that Dean definitely lacked in earlier. He tilted his head slightly as Castiel continued to stare at him with those ridiculously blue eyes. After a few moments of more intense staring, Castiel quietly said his question and it was one Dean had not been ready to answer.

“Are you Gay?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, my Sweethearts. 
> 
> Please leave any comments for me in the comment section.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	9. The Puppeteer

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ooh, a different Point-of-View   
> My baby, Balthy.

Two seconds. Balthazar was gone all for two seconds and the sight that greeted him when he returned with three coffees balanced carefully on a tray. Empty chairs. For fuck sake. Cassie had promised him that he would not disappear like this on this tour. Balthy placed the tray on the table in the middle of the small set up of chairs and sofas; angrily fishing his phone out of his pocket to dial Castiel’s number. No answer. Bloody typical. He sat heavily into one of the armchairs, chewing his thumbnail absentmindedly as Balthazar tried to figure out a plan of action for getting Cassie to actual pay attention to what Balthy tell him to do.

Balthazar was about ready to chew through his actual thumb when he saw his phone ringing on the coffee table and a blurry picture appearing on his screen. He grinned as he swiped across the screen answering after only three rings.

“Hello Darling”

Balthazar rolled his eyes, examining his other fingernails as he continued the unexpected phone call.

“Of course not. Cassie is perfectly fine and I am doing an amazing job, thank you...”

He frowned as he listens to the verbal reply from the person on the other end of the telephone. Balthazar leaned forward in the chair to rearrange several sugar packets that were sat next to his cup of coffee, tearing a corner off one of the packets and dumping the contents of one into his coffee

“He is absolutely fine, still got an attitude problem. Oh yes, the journalist. Dean… Winchester I think he said his name was and he is no threat to your little plan at all. He is here to “find the truth” but I bet Cassie is going to feed him the same bullshit he feeds every other no talent hack who interviews him to try and find the "Real" Castiel Novak.”

Balthazar leaned back into the chair, stretching his legs out in front of him and under the table, carefully trying not to knock the table itself. He groans low in the speaker of the phone by accident, grinning at the angry curses words filtering through from the other end of the line.

“Calm down, I was just stretching and I certainly wouldn't do anything like that with you on the phone. I have other people I can call for that kind of phone call if you get my drift."

He chuckles, grinning wide at the uncomfortable cough that he heard from the other end. Balthazar glanced down at the watch on his wrist, frowning at the time.

“Yeah, I got to go and find the prodigal son again. Of course he has wandered off. I am seriously considering putting Cassie on a leash when we are out in public from now on. Yeah, of course. You too Michael, see you soon Brother. Bye"

Balthazar tossed his phone back onto the coffee table as he took a large gulp of his sweet coffee, sighing in contentment as he felt the caffeine starting to flow through his system almost immediately. He leaned back into the chair, carefully nursing his first cup of coffee of the day as Balthy a weight beginning to lift itself from his shoulders. When Balthazar took over as manager for The Rebellion Garrison, he would of never had guessed it would mean bending over backwards to keep his brothers from killing each other in their sleep. Gabriel and Samandriel were easy to keep happy, stick on a Disney film and give them $100 worth of sweets and they were happier than pigs in muck. But Michael, Luci and Cassie were the hardest to please. Always have been, always will be.

Michael - always needed to be the leader and whatever he told you to do, you do it without asking any questions. An intimidator with a power complex.

Luci - the first to rebel against what their parents wanted their lives to become and set his own way in life. No wonder he was named after Lucifer.

Castiel - Wandering off from important things in his life since he was 7 years old and never listening to a damn thing he is told. He would rather watch the bees or something.

Then there was Balthazar. Poor little Balthy, the only brother who did his own thing and please his parents at the same time. Not the easiest of things to do but somehow, Balthy had managed it. A manager of a successful band, travelling all over the world. It was just a simple coincident that the band was made up of his brothers and a good friend of the family - Meg.

Balthazar nearly dropped his coffee into his lap as his own assistant - Crowley - appeared behind him, with a giant stack of paper work in his arms. Fuck. It was definitely going to be a long day. He frowned as he stared up at Crowley but the man in front of him simply shrugged his shoulders before dropping the papers in a chair before disappearing again. Balthy downed the rest of the coffee, glaring at the stack of papers. He reached for another of the three cups of coffee. Balthazar would definitely need all three if he was going to get through the day without killing anyone. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading.   
> There are several upcoming chapters from a variety of POV's and I'll label each chapter with who it is so you're not left wondering for too long. 
> 
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	10. Excuse Me?

The question had been swimming around in Castiel’s since he had woken up that morning to find a gorgeous stranger staring back at him; although Cas should have picked a more appropriate delivery of such a personal question. But his mouth was running a mile or two in front of his brain and before he knew it, Castiel’s mouth was moving and those words he had been repeating to himself for the last hour slipped out.

“Are you Gay?”

Cas regretted saying the words as soon he saw Dean’s reaction; or the lack of a reaction. He tilted his head slightly to the side, watching the reporter carefully but nothing. Dean simply stared back with his amazingly green eyes and his mouth only slightly open. After a few moments, it became rather unnerving and Castiel shifted uncomfortably in his seat.

“I-I’m sorry. Just forget I asked that one, okay? Um…. Are you okay, Dean? I didn’t mean to break you, if I have broken you…”   
They both sat in silence for a few minutes more, sounds of clattering cups and quiet conversation between the few other people in the small café filling the background. Cas bit his bottom lip worrying he had stepped out of a line until Dean finally spoke.

"No... You haven't broken me..."

"Thank fuck for that. I thought you were either going to cry or throw a punch"

"No... I wouldn't punch you in such a public place and I don't cry that easily"

“Right… uhh… that’s good, I guess”

Castiel sighed in relief, taking a small sip of his now lukewarm coffee. He frowned as he glanced over at Dean, he was staring into his own coffee cup as if it held the answer to the universe. Cas picked at one of the napkins underneath his mug as he waited for Dean to speak again. He knew that sometimes he could cross boundaries and not realize it but surely, Dean would forgive him for asking such a question.

Wait... Why did Castiel care about what Dean thought and was feeling? He had only met the reporter this morning and all of a sudden, Cas was talking as if they had known each other for years. He had to stop thinking like that. Dean was assigned to follow him around for 8 months, not to become his friend or anything more. This was ridiculous.

"I-I'm Gay..."

That certainly snapped Castiel out of his own thoughts. He looked across the table at Dean, pushing all of those distracting thoughts to the very back of his mind to concentrate on what was going on right in front of him. Cas tried not to grin as he stared over at the other man.

"You are?"

"Yes, and I sure as hell shouldn't of told you that I am either"

"Well, why not?"

"Because..."

"Because? That isn't really a reason, you know..."

Cas could see Dean's cheeks getting brighter and brighter as their conversation continued but he was unsure if it was due to anger or embarrassment. It was completely understandable if Dean was angry at him for asking such a personal question and Dean is supposed to be asking Cas questions, not the other way around. But he needed to know this, if Cas had any chance of having something with Dean or not. Fuck. He really needed to stop thinking like that. Nothing could happen between them, even if both them wanted each other.

Several minutes passed were neither of them said a word, they sipped at their cooling coffees and stole fleeting glances of each other. The silence was growing more and more uncomfortable as more minutes ticked by until - finally - Dean spoke again.

"I am not out to anyone here - well, apart from you now... News around these parts spread like wild fire and if my father ever found out.... he would disown me in a heartbeat..."

"A-are you out to anyone at all?"

Castiel kept his voice low and spoke softly, remembering a similar conversation he had himself with Gabriel several years ago and how his older brother spoke to him. He didn't want to force Dean to talk about this subject but he seriously wanted to know more about the man sat across from him.

"My brother Sam and his girlfriend Jess. Sammy has always known and I-I told Jess last year..."

"And you just told me"

"Yeah... I really shouldn't have told you though. I have only just met you..."

At least they were on the same page about something. Castiel nodded his head, draining his mug of the remains of the cold coffee. He was unsure about how to continue this conversation without boring Dean even further. Thankfully, his phone began ringing in his pocket and broke the uncomfortable air between them. His ringtone - the opening bars of "I Want it All" by Queen - filling Cas with relief. He smiles sadly over at Dean as he stands to walk outside with his phone. Cas swipes his thumb over the screen, answering the call.

"What do you want Gabriel?"

"Where are you? Balthazar is throwing a major fit over you wandering off again and taking that reporter guy with you too"

"I didn't wander off and I can take care of myself"

"I know that bro, but you know how bitchy Balthy gets when he doesn't know where you are..."

Castiel could feel the anger starting to bubble up in his chest. Balthazar doted on him like a mother hen and kept him from doing anything that isn't written down in his precious schedule. It made Cas feel like a tiger in a cage, only being brought out for people to watch for their own amusement or a dancing monkey that you poke with a stick to make it perform.

“I don’t care Gabriel. I need a damn break from his royal highness and that fucking schedule from hell of his. All of us in the band have been working hard and Balthazar wants us to keep this up for another 8 months. It is going to break us.”

"I know Castiel but we have to keep at it otherwise he is going to leave. Then what? We are left with no manager and become another washed up rock band. I don't want that to happen to us"

Cas sighed tiredly through the phone, turning to look at Dean through the window. He was still sat in his seat, with his back painfully straight as he was waiting for Castiel to return. Dean was here to find out the stories about Castiel that aren't printed in the newspapers every week and it was kind of exciting for Cas. He could finally talk about issues that he couldn't talk with every reporter that turns up to interview him. Dean seemed genuinely interested and trustworthy. Damn it. Those ridiculous thoughts again. He rubbed a hand over his eyes as he turns away from the window.

"I'm tired Gabriel. I can't keep doing this forever. I need a rest"

"I know bro, you are going to burn out if Balthazar keeps working like this but what are we supposed to do?"

"I don't know"

Silence filed the line between the brothers as Cas tried to will the approaching headache away. What were they going to do? They couldn't fire Balthazar and they couldn't go on working with him either.

"Tell Balthazar to stop throwing a hissy fit. I will be at the bus in 10 minutes and Dean is with me."

"Okay, prepare yourself for a shit storm when you get there though. He is really not happy this time Cas"

"Thanks Gabe. I'll see you in a few moments"

"Right bro. Smell you later"

Castiel rolled his eyes and smiled as he hung up. No matter what crap was going on in their lives, he knew he could rely on Gabriel to cheer him up even if it wasn’t on purpose. Cas quickly returned to his seat, frowning over the table at Dean. He was just staring straight back at Castiel with those unearthly green eyes. Seriously, how can someone’s eyes be that perfect?

“That was Gabriel. We have to get back to the tour bus”

“Oh… okay. Umm sure. Let’s go. Do we have to pay for the coffees?”

“No, I paid in advance yesterday.”

“That is pretty awesome. Do you do that a lot?”

“Umm… not really. I just really enjoyed finding this place and I thought it be easier”

“Ahhh… that is really good thinking.”

Castiel turned to grin over at Dean and his eyes crinkled at the corners slightly. He was starting to enjoy Dean’s company. He had thought that it was a bad idea bringing a reporter on tour with the band but his mind was changing over the matter the more time he spends with Dean. He held the door open for the other man and walked closer than he probably should have with Dean; their shoulders bumping occasionally as they made their way through the busy streets.

Castiel had to hide his smile as the kept walking together like that. He could definitely get used to spending much more with Dean, even if it didn't mean they were going to have sex. Dean seemed like a man that Cas could grow close to and maybe - one day - they could be together in a relationship. But for now, Castiel was quite content with walking and talking with Dean.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comments that you have for me in the comment section below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	11. Oh Brother, Where Are Thou?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Flashback Chapter with Cas and Gabe. 
> 
> Michael is 22  
> Lucifer is 21   
> Gabriel is 18  
> Castiel is 11  
> Balthazar is 13   
> Samandriel is 4/5

_**~ 15 YEARS BEFORE ~** _

Castiel ran through the front door of their house, tears streaming down his face and mixing with the blood from his nose. His school bag was throw into the kitchen without as much as a second look. He sprinted to his bedroom immediately; ignoring all protests and surprised looks from his family.

The front of his school shirt had a large blood stain from Cas’s broken nose. He lost his tie – running home – and one of his sleeves was ripped at the seam. Castiel’s face was swollen around his left eye and bruising was already forming across his jaw.

Several hours later – after Castiel had refused to leave his room for dinner – a soft knock came out of his door. The boy lifted his head from where he was curled up under his duvet. He remained silent, willing the person at his door to believe he was asleep and to go away. It didn’t work. Another knock came against the wood, followed by a familiar voice.

“Castiel… Let me in bro. It’s just me here”

Gabriel. His ever loving older brother and the best waffle maker Cas has ever known. The small boy wanted to let his older brother in but he hated the thought of explaining the bruising to anyone. He had been embarrassed enough for one day, despite knowing that Gabriel would never laugh or taunt him.

"Come on Man, my bladder is about to burst and I will pee on your door if you don't open up"

It was a threat that Cas had heard Gabriel use many times before and he knew he would actually pee on his door to make his point. He walked calmly over and unlocked his door, pouting at Gabriel on the other side.

“What do you want Gabriel?”

“Holy shit, what happened to your face?”

Here we go. Castiel rolled his eyes as best he could; standing aside to allow Gabriel in his room and locking the door again after him.

“Seriously Cassie, the fuck happened?”

“I only tolerate Balthazar calling me that so don’t!”

Cas snapped at the older Novak as he gingerly sat in the chair by his desk, holding his left side. He stared at Gabriel's back as he watched his brother rifling through a box of Castiel's shoes.

"What do you want Gabriel? I have homework to do..."

"Well, that is going to be hard to do as your bag is still on the kitchen floor"

"I was going to come down and get it... eventually"

“Yeah, I’m sure”

Castiel rolled his eyes, hissing through his teeth as he twists around to stare at the papers on his desk. Thankfully his nose had stopped bleeding and he could finally stop staining anything he got near. He could hear Gabriel touching random objects on the other side of the room, obviously thinking of something to say. Cas sighed as he heard the older boy clearing his throat to speak.

"Castiel. Come on, what happened today? You got a busted nose, your face is pretty messed up and I'm guessing your ribs hurt like fuck too."

He shut his eyes, a lump forming in the back of his throat as he heard the springs in his bed squeak from Gabriel sitting on them. Castiel didn’t want to talk. He just wanted to forget that today even happened and hide under his covers until his face was healed.

“I know you’ve had a couple of problems at school”

Understatement of the Century. Castiel hated it there. The boys were rough and bitter. The girls were cruel and vicious. He didn’t belong there at all. The only sort of friend he had in the school was a very nervous boy called Chuck and his own brother Balthazar. But Balthy was two years older than Cas and couldn’t hang around as much as Castiel wanted him to do.

He stood out like a sore thumb at that school and everyone – including his parents – knew that. Since day one, Cas didn’t fit in at all. No one would sit next to him at lunch because they didn’t want to catch his “Strange” way of behaving. His “Strange” way of behaving was wearing socks that were decorated with cartoon bees and an unfashionable trench coat.

“You know you can tell me anything Kiddo. Right? I mean that too. Anything.”

“W-We… We’ve been learning about Sex Ed this week and stuff…”

Cas glanced over his shoulder at Gabriel. His older was staring at him, expression blank and not a single sign of him breaking out into laughter any time soon so he continued.

“They taught us about r-relationships too… and… and… b-being gay…”

He kept his eyes straight forward, not risking a look at Gabriel. The lump in his throat made it hard to swallow and he could feel his eyes starting to sting again with tears.

“I-I know I’m different and I told Chuck that… I-I… I don’t like girls… like… the way the other boys like the girls… and…”

It all came crashing back to reality and the tears started again. Cas rested his head against the desk, sobbing louder and louder. His ribs screamed out in pain but that didn’t matter. Everything was wrong. He was wrong. They had beaten that into Cas today. That he was wrong and needed to be punished for being gay. Cas's nose cracked when he pressed his face further into the desk, He wanted it all to stop. Why couldn't he be normal for once? Like everyone else. Why did Castiel have to be different?

He barely noticed Gabriel's hands puling his up from the seat and sitting him on the edge of the bed. His brother sat closer to Cas, a hand still tightly holding his shoulder. Cas still shook with every sob, his entire body throbbing and the words getting stuck in his throat as he tried to speak through the tears.

“S-Someone… found out… o-older boys… I-I... they… t-they…“

Cas’s vision was blurred causing everything to be out of his focus. He willingly laid down as Gabriel pulled him down onto his back, carefully wrapping an arm around Castiel’s shoulders. He hid his face in his older brother’s shirt, longing for the pain to go away. Cas was longing for everything to go away. He could barely hear Gabriel's voice from above him.

"Its all okay. You are with me. You're safe Castiel. Everything is going to be okay. I promise, little brother."

Gabriel’s voice was soothing, it sounded so soft that no one could hear them from outside that room. His voice seemed to swirl around Castiel’s ears and instantly soothed his nerves. His body stopped shaking as the tears stopped too. Cas’s face stayed hidden in Gabriel’s shirt; the boy wanting to hide away from his fears for the rest of time. His face began to throb in time with a massive impending headache. Cas managed to pull his face from Gabriel's shirt, frowning as he looked up at his older brother.

"I-I'm sorry... Gabriel... I-I... "

"It's okay Castiel. I'm not going to be mad because you told me the truth. Now, its your turn to listen to me okay?"

Castiel nodded his head the best he was able to, the pounding of a headache getting closer and closer. He shut his eyes as he listened to Gabriel speak again.

"Being gay is okay. Don't let anyone tell you different. It is all okay and people who say otherwise. Well... they are a great big bag of dicks."

He could feel Gabriel chuckling at his own use of swear words.

"There are going to be quite a few people that are going to tell you that being gay is not okay and that you should be punished for it. They are full of bullshit. Okay? You remember that because there are a lot more people who are gay and who aren't but support gay rights. Still okay down there, bro?"

"Y-Yeah... What if.... W-what if they hit me again?"

Cas felt Gabriel shift underneath for a moment, he glanced up at his brother but frowned when he spotted the uneasy expression on Gabriel's face.

"Then... Then you will stand with your head held high and know that your life is going to be much better than theirs or something like that."

"T-Thanks Gabriel... I think"

"Right Bucko. Are you going to come downstairs now? You don't need to explain anything to the rest of them. It can just be between us for now"

"Yes please..."

Castiel's stomach had perfect timing and growled loudly at the mere thought of food. He smiled tiredly at Gabriel, carefully lifting himself off of his brother's chest and walking across the room to unlock his door again. Cas spotted Balthazar sat at the bottom of the stair case with a very stern look on his face as he noticed Gabriel and Castiel emerging from his room.

"Cassie! I was so worried. Are you okay? Do you need me to kill anyone? I will if you want. Crap, look at your nose. Are you really okay? Tell me who did this Cassie and I will smite them in an instant"

He smiled as Balthazar continued his angry rant with his arm extending wide in wildly exaggerated gestures. Cas smiled at Gabriel as they passed each other at the bottom of the stairs. It felt like a weight had been lifted off Castiel’s shoulders and his chest felt less restricted. He was able to breathe properly again. Cas knew that things were going to be difficult in the future but at that precise moment, he did not care.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, Darlings! 
> 
> Please leave any comments down below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	12. Home Sweet Home

The walk back to where Balthazar had parked the tour bus was a little more difficult that Dean thought it was going to be. Firstly, Balthazar believed in keeping the bus as far away from the hotel as possible – for some ungodly reason. Secondly, they kept getting stopped by people in the street asking Castiel for autographs or photographs. Finally - the real kicker of his whole day so far - Dean's stomach kept leaping each time they bumped shoulders. He was being absolutely ridiculous. Dean had to stop acting like a teenage girl with a crush on some guy who didn't even know they existed.

He stared straight ahead as they walked further and further out of Kansas’s town centre, following Castiel’s lead blindly. The noise of the city was getting quieter and the quiet atmosphere was starting to get uncomfortable again. Dean needed to break the silence with some form of conversation with Cas but his mind was a complete blank. Think of something Winchester!

“What are they like? Your brothers?”

Dean heard Castiel chuckle quietly at his question. He glanced at the man beside him, he was trying so hard not to smile.

“My brothers are… different. The only thing we all really have in common is our surname”

“But Balthazar’s surname is Roche?”

“Balthazar is – of course – the exception to that statement. Technically, we are only half-brothers but I’ve known him for most of my life”

There was something Dean didn’t know. He always thought that Balthazar was a full Novak brother. Maybe Bobby was right and there was much more to this family than what meets the eye.

“Same Mom or Dad?”

"We share a father. My mother took Balthazar in to our home when he was about 3 years old and I was still in nappies"

"Do you mind if I ask what happened to his biologic mother? If... If that's okay"

Castiel shrugged his shoulders and Dean tilted his head slightly as he listened closely. His eyes watching a few woman walking on the other side of the street who were pointing at both of them.

“Balthazar’s birth mother was my father’s secretary at the time. They had been having an affair for 4 years or so. I am sure my mother knew about them but she never said a word to him. Anyway, Balthazar was the result of their affair and my father took responsibility of raising him. I’m not quite sure what ever happened to his biological mother after Balthazar came to live with us.”

A strange expression flashed across Castiel’s face - something that Dean could not put his finger on. It lasted for only a second but it was still there. A simple flicker of emotion that seemed to change the entire atmosphere of their conversation. They both remained in silence until they rounded the final corner and was met with the sight of a very red-faced Balthazar and Gabriel in a fit of laughter. Dean hid a smile behind his hand as he watched the scene between the brothers unfold in front of him.

“Gabriel Richard Novak! This is not a laughing matter!”

“Of course it’s a laughing matter. You seriously need to lighten up Balth…”

“It is not! I am trying to run a damn tour and you acting like a damn five year old is not helpful at all! I will kick your ass to the fucking curb if you do anything like that again, understand?”

The atmosphere changed within the blink of an eye and the smile from Gabriel's - and Castiel's - face slipped away. Dean could barely see the expression of Balthazar's face but he could certainly tell that the manager was seething with anger from the simple tone of his voice.

“Now, get your goddamn ass on that bus and shut your fucking mouth until we get to the next gig or so help me I shall tape your pie-hole shut.”

Everyone seemed to follow Balthazar's demand even though it was only directed at Gabriel. Dean followed Castiel closely as they all quickly filed into the tour bus and settled into the "assigned" areas.

"That doesn't happen as often as you think it does. They usually stay out of each other’s way."

Castiel had already made himself as comfortable as a person could get in a seat on a bus. His head was tilted back and his eyes was closed shut – as if he was sleeping. Dean kept his back straight as he continued to peer over the seat in front of him to catch a glimpse at Gabriel’s incredibly red face a couple of rows in front of him and Cas.

“Gabriel found a packet of itching powder and managed to put them in Balthazar’s condoms without him noticing anything was wrong”

There was a slight pause. Dean looked at Cas over his shoulder. It looked almost like – yes – he was trying not to laugh. Premature wrinkles appeared at the corners of the singer’s eyes and his biting his bottom lip in such a way that should be illegal.

Oh fuck no.

Dean could feel his cheeks getting hotter and hotter the more he stared at those pretty pink lips caught between his teeth. There were a thousand and one thoughts running through his head about things he could do with those damn lips. He could kiss them or have them wrapped around his…

Fuck. No. Abort. Abort.

He shook his head bringing his gaze back up to met with the purest of blue eyes he has ever seen. The colour was so deep that Dean could feel himself drowning in a sea of blue and loving every single moment of it. The smile had faded from Castiel's lips and had been replaced with a small smirk as if the singer could read Dean's mind.

Fuck, when did he open his eyes? Shit. Shit. Get out of there Winchester!

"Umm... I-I'll be right back..."

Dean couldn't have moved out of the seat faster even if his ass was on fire. He hopped a row forward and landed in the seat next to Samandriel. The youngest of the six Novak brothers had been deeply engrossed in a book and seemed quite surprised when Dean smiled across at him.

"Oh... H-Hello... umm... I'm sorry but I don't know your name..."

"My bad bud, I'm Dean and you must be Samandriel right?.."

"Woah, yeah... Sorry but you actually said my name correctly. I normally get called Sam or Sammy..."

"Yeah, I've been practicing ever since I got this gig. Didn't want to insult you or anything. Do you mind being called Sam?"

"No, not at all. Just nice to have someone call me by my actual name for once"

He could feel the tension leaving his shoulders and he could sit back in the seat, finally relaxing for the first time since he dragged himself out of bed this morning. He felt more at ease talking to Samandriel. The kid was beyond smart and quite laid back about being in one of the world's biggest bands but he kept looking over Dean's shoulder every couple of minutes. After a good half an hour of him peering over his shoulder, Dean's curiosity got the better of him.

"Sam what are you looking at behind me? I don't want to sound rude or anything, Kid"

"Well, its Castiel. He keeps looking at you in a really strange way"

"How strange? Give me something to work with here"

"Well, its like you see in those "coming of age" films. You know, where the boy looks across at the girl all lovingly and the girl catches him so he looks away. That kind of look"

Dean was definitely not prepared for that at all. Lovingly? Seriously? He turned around to attempt to catch the singer staring at him. Castiel had his eyes closed and looked fast asleep in his seat. He raised an eyebrow at Samandriel as he turned back around in his seat.

"I swear he keeps looking at you Dean!"

This was ridiculous. He had no doubt that Samandriel was telling the truth, the kid had no reason to lie to him. But why would Castiel be staring at him in the way that Samandriel told him? Dean caught a glimpse of a sign out of the window.

**_Tacoma, Washington - 1600 Miles_ **

Fuck. Nearly 2000 miles to the next stop in The Rebellion Garrison's tour and Dean was stuck on a bus with the prima donna of all front men and his band who think that Castiel has a thing for him. This was going to be one hell of a tour.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, humans! 
> 
> Please leave any comments below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	13. This is Your Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael's Point of View!   
> This is set a day after the last chapter.   
> Just FYI.

Michael flipped through the latest issue of some rag mag that had been left on his desk that morning with his feet firmly rested on top of his desk. His coffee mug placed carefully within reaching distance with no fear of knocking it over the papers spread across the floor near his antique desk.

It contained the usual crap pieces of journalism that seemed to have the public enthralled to buy the magazine over and over again. The articles maybe the results of some wannabe novelist polish a turd of a news item but the various headlines did amuse him in a slightly ironic way. Not so many moons ago, Michael was on the front page of every magazine, newspaper and anything in-between. Now, he gets to sit back reading the ridiculous articles.

** HUSBAND DOESN’T KNOW I'M HIS WIFE – BUT I STILL LOVE HIM **

Michael chuckled quietly as he skimmed over the details that the reporter had outlined. A man who had extreme short term memory loss could not remember marrying his wife of 3 years. He flipped over onto the next page of the magazine when that particular story lost his interest.

** I MARRIED MY LAPTOP **

Truly a ridiculous story of a teenage shut-in applying for a marriage license for himself and his PC. He rolled his eyes as he continued to read more stories that kept getting more and more impossible to believe until he was greeted with a familiar face. A grainy photo of his younger brother walking and smiling with another man he did not recognize close by, also smiling.

**THE REBELLION GARRISON LEAD SINGER GOT A BOYFRIEND?**

Michael’s right leg unexpectedly jerked and sent his coffee mug flying across the room and spilling its contents on a set of blue prints that he had laid across the floor as well as his papers.

“Fuck. Fuckity fuck. Stupid coffee mug”

He could worry about that mess later but now he had more pressing matters on his mind. Michael sat with his back painfully straight in his leather chair, his feet planted firmly back on the floor. He closely examined and read the article several times.

“Castiel Novak – lead singer of The Rebellion Garrison – was seen yesterday morning walking with an equally handsome man through Kansas city centre. People nearby first spotted the pair exiting a small café practically hand in hand with each other. Our sources inform us that the man’s name is Dean Winchester – a reporter for Singer’s magazine. It is to be believed that Mr Winchester is accompanying the band on their latest tour but we have reason to believe that Mr Novak and Mr Winchester are in a relationship together”

Michael ripped the magazine in two and then again into smaller pieces. The paper easily coming apart between his fingers as the bubble of anger in his chest growing hotter and more intense every time he ripped the pages apart.

All of the hard work he had done over the years to create Castiel the reputation of being a lady’s man and completely untouchable by anybody had been destroyed in a matter on moments by this Dean Winchester. Michael threw the remains of the magazine across the room, placing his elbows on his desk and holding his head in his hands.

Michael’s name was still in the copyrighting documents for the band. If they don’t sell albums then he doesn’t get more money from his little brother’s “talent.” This could not be happening right now. No one would want to see some fairy prancing around the stage, pretending he is Freddie freaking Mercury. He needed to do something to make sure that Castiel scared this possible love interest away and quickly.

 Michael’s plan to get Castiel to question Balthazar’s managing style by running him into the ground seemed to have been working but it wasn’t fast enough. He sat back in his chair, his hands clenched tightly into fists on the arms of the chair. Something needed to happen and it needed to happen now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> In case anyone is confused - including myself - Michael wants Cas to get so pissed at how Balthazar Is managing the band that Michael gets asked back to manage The Rebellion Garrison and in turn gets more money. 
> 
> So sorry for the slut use but Michael is a very big dick and that is how I think he would think about it. So sorry. I don't like using slurs or anything negative like that at all but sometimes you have to when writing. 
> 
> Thanks for reading as always  
> Please leave any comments below   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	14. Midnight Train

Castiel watched the street lights flicker as the bus drove down another interstate somewhere in the middle of “who gives a fuck.” The migraine had started about half an hour ago and hadn’t eased at all. Everything was starting to piss Cas off. The endless number of street lights passing by them, the sound of Balthazar snoring behind him and the fucking beautiful sight of Dean sleeping next to Samandriel. No one should look so flawless whilst asleep. Let alone some guy that just happened to be gay as well and that may actually like Cas. Nope. He was not going to do this to himself again.

God, he needed a break from all of this. The constant touring was going to kill him or was going to drive him to kill one of the other band members. Castiel loved all of his brothers – and Meg – dearly but being confined in close proximity with each other for this long is just ridiculous and sure to send anyone a little crazy. He pulled the hood of his jacket over his head trying to muffle the outside world but the noise in his head would not go away.

He carefully walked down the aisle between the seats and leaned against the seat just behind the driver – Crowley had been Balthazar’s loyal assistant for a couple of months now. He was a few years old and had a slight temper at times but Crowley seemed like a good man to Cas.

“Where are we at the moment?”

“Somewhere between Kansas and Washington. Your guess is as good as mine at the moment, Ducky. I follow the GPS not the signs”

Great. In the middle of fuck knows where and stuck on a bus full of his idiot brothers, a bass player who wants to fuck him 24 hours each day and a reporter that Castiel couldn’t get out of his mind. He needed rest or a day away from the noise to soothe his nerves.

“How are we away from the nearest town?”

“Well, it says about 10 miles so about 20 minutes away.”

Castiel pulled his wallet out of his back pocket and fished several bills out of the largest compartment before shoving them in Crowley’s shirt pocket.

“There is $150, drop me off as soon as we hit the next town and don’t say a word to Balthazar about this”

“What?! I can’t do that. No matter how much you pay me to keep quiet!”

“Will you keep your damn voice down? I need time away from… this… Crowley. Otherwise I am going to kill someone, most likely Balthazar. I won’t be gone for long. Just a day or two and I will take the heat when I come back. I promise, you won’t get in trouble”

He could see the frustration in Crowley’s reflection on the windshield. It was true; Castiel needed a break from touring and this was the perfect opportunity. He will disappear under the cover of darkness like in a film and return as quietly as he left.

“If I get fired because of this I am going to kick your arse Novak”

Castiel grinned wide almost like a Cheshire cat and nearly jumped away from the seat in excitement.

“Thanks Man. I appreciate this so fucking much, you don’t even know”

"Whatever, grab a light bag and try not to wake the boss. He would skin me alive if he found out I helped you disappear during the night."

He scrambled back to his original seat and grabbed the backpack on the empty seat next to his. It had basic essentials: Underwear, shirts, socks, condoms and a toothbrush. The very basic needs of what Castiel planned for his time off. However, the next part is a bit more tricky than paying Crowley to let him sneak off the bus. The next part was to get Dean to join him in his little adventure. This was going to end so badly and Cas was sure that Balthazar would wake up any second just to scream at him for trying to sneak away.

"Hey Man. Are you awake?"

Castiel gently shook Dean's shoulder, hoping to God or anyone who would listen that he wasn't that deep in sleep. Samandriel was fast asleep net to him and his face was pressed against the window of the tour bus. Cas kept listening closely to Balthazar’s snoring to make sure the manager fast asleep like the everyone else. He shook the reporter’s shoulder again and this time Dean woke up looking very confused and adorable as fuck in the process. Shit. Even in the dark, Dean’s eyes fucking sparkled like something mystical.

“Hey. Can you get your bag quietly and creep to the front of the bus with me?”

Dean was obviously not quite awake enough yet to fully understand what Castiel was asking of him. It took an enormous amount of self-control not for Cas to grin at the cute as hell look on his face right at the moment as he tried to comprehend what he was being told.

“Wait… w-what?”

“Grab your bag and get to the front but do it quietly”

Castiel didn’t give Dean the chance to argue back; he turned his back and tiptoed up the front again and sat on the edge of the seat behind Crowley. He could see the drive glance back at him every so often and simply shake his head before returning his attention back to the road ahead. He had this small in the back of his head – that sounded strangely like Michael – telling him that this was wrong and that he was letting people down by sneaking off like this again but he needed time away. He needed time to regroup and then he could come back even stronger than before and prove everyone wrong.

Castiel sat completely still with his eyes firmly fixed on the approaching lights of the town. He barely acknowledged Dean sitting on the seat to the left of him with a small canvas bag by his side. Once Crowley gently stopped the bus outside what looked to be a hotel, Cas pulled Dean off the bus by his wrist and waved Crowley quickly on so Balthazar didn't have time to wake up and work out was going on. Castiel sighed in relief that his plan actually worked as he watched the tour bus disappear around a corner and there was no sound or sight of an angry Balthazar storming towards them to drag them back to the bus.

Finally. Castiel grinned over at Dean who was still looking very confused at this point and still had that too cute look on his face. He threw back his head in laughter at the pleasure of being free to whatever he wanted to do for a few hours and not have to answer to a certain Balthazar Roche. The joy of being able to get some rest and actually relax for once overtook Castiel and he wrapped his arms around Dean in a tight hug that lasted slightly longer that most people would be comfortable with from a complete stranger. When Cas finally went to pull away from the embrace, he noticed Dean had - albeit hesitantly – wound his arms around Cas’s waist and was holding him as if he was going to hurt it him. Castiel smiled softly at Dean as he felt a strange warming feeling starting to fill his chest as he continued to stare into the eyes of the reporter.

It was ridiculous how much Dean’s eyes sparkled in the dark. Cas had never seen someone with such beautiful eyes before and he just tightened his arms around Dean’s shoulders slightly instinctively. They were so close to each other and it was just like they were imitating a scene from an old black and white romance film. Castiel could hear his heart thumping as loud as anything else and his stomach was tying itself in tight knots as he saw Dean's eyes flick down to his mouth and then back up to his eyes again.

He had thought about kissing Dean over the last day and a bit. Every time Dean spoke to him or was talking to another person; Cas would get the strong urge to grab him with both hands and kiss him there and then in front of whoever was there. Now, he had the chance to actually kiss Dean and he was the most nervous he has ever been in his life. Castiel tilted his head slightly to the right and inched his face closer to Dean's own. The journalist didn't back away or let his arms go from around Castiel's waist. They were so close now that Cas could count each one of Dean's freckles as their noses brushed together. This was pure torture and Cas couldn't take it anymore. He quickly closed the small space between their lips and let his eyes fall shut. It was slightly awkward to begin with but to Castiel; it was the most perfect kiss he could have ever imagined and surpassed his expectations of Dean by a country mile.

HIs lips were soft and he smelt like a mix of cinnamon, coffee and vanilla. Cas slid his hands slowly into Dean's hair, carefully not trying to cross a line or go too far and have Dean pull away. He tugged gently to have Dean tilt his head as Cas began to deepen the kiss and he was thrown off guard when he heard and felt Dean moan against his mouth. Cas cant remember the last time he heard a sound that was so perfect and turned him on so much that he was ready to drop his pants there and then. Fuck whatever Michael, Balthazar and whoever else thought about him. In this moment here, Castiel felt perfect and he wanted it to last even longer. Castiel gently tugged at Dean's hair again and soon heard that beautiful sound of the other man moaning into his mouth. Sadly, he had to pull back from the kiss to catch his breath but he rested his forehead against Dean's whilst keeping his eyes close to savour the moment they were in.

"C-Cas..."

Castiel didn't want for it to be over this quickly; he wanted to stay like this with Dean for just a little while longer yet. He squeezed his eyes shut tighter, pretending he didn't hear Dean. It didn't work at all.

"Castiel... we need to go..."

No. I don't want to. I want to stay here and kiss you again, Castiel thought to himself. This was ridiculous - They were not in a relationship and this is definitely not Romeo and Juliet.

"Cas, we really need to go. Right this second"

He was very confused about Dean's hurry to get away. Maybe he didn't like being kissed by Cas or maybe Cas had overstepped the mark. He shifted and stilled when he felt something against his hip. At that moment, Dean rolled his hips and pressed his hardening cock against Cas's hip more obviously to get his message across to his singer. Fuck, he was hard just from a kiss and Cas could feel his own cock twitch in interest.

"Castiel. Please. We need to go otherwise I'm going to beg you to fuck me right here..."

Fuck. Castiel groaned from the back of his throat and ground his own crotch against Dean's hip. They definitely needed to go somewhere and have some real fun. Thank God for Crowley and the fact he dropped them outside a small hotel that looked half decent. Tonight Cas was going to show Dean the real side of him and hopefully get the reporter to bend over backwards for me - in the literal sense.

This was going to be a night to remember.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as always, for reading! 
> 
> Just FYI for the next chapter as it is smut so if that's not your jam then here's your warning.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	15. Rainbow in the Dark

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the Beginning of the Smut

Fuck. Fuck. What the hell was he doing? No this was wrong. Dean had to pull away and stop this before they did something they both would regret. One kiss was not going to hurt anyone but practically dry humping each other in public was another matter entirely. No. They had to stop this. They needed to...

Castiel chose that exact moment to grind himself against Dean's hip and his brain melted away any thoughts about this being wrong. His "other brain" took over causing Dean to grab Cas's hips and rock them together. Dean couldn't take this anymore. He needed to get the singer somewhere private so they could really have some fun together. Castiel must have been a mind reader as he dragged Dean into the building they were dropped off in front of and - Thank God - it was a hotel. The man at the front desk had a very peculiar expression on his face when they managed to pull away from each other long enough to check in but that all changed once they were inside the elevator.

Dean was pressed against one of the walls as soon as the elevator doors clicked shut and Cas was grinding against his hips with his mouth firmly attached to his neck, sucking a rather deep mark wherever he could reach.

Fuuuuck.

So, this was how Dean was going to die; with the hardest erection he has ever had in his life and a rock star rutting up against him like a dog in heat. At least he was going out with a bang. Dean mentally slapped the back of his head. This was no time to be making very bad puns.

His brain caught up with what Cas was doing and leapt into action. Dean growled as his hands gripped the singer’s jacket before spinning them both around to press Cas against the wall of the elevator. His turn to drive Castiel crazy. Dean pressed a thigh in-between Cas’s legs, grinding it down onto the singer’s hard cock whilst he dragged his teeth almost teasingly across the sensitive spot underneath Cas’s ear. He could feel the singer shudder against him and a beautifully pornographic groan is pulled from the back of Cas’s throat. That was a sound that Dean would never get tired of hearing even if this was a one night stand and they never do this again; Dean will definitely not forget those sinful noises.

The elevator doors finally "pinged" open onto an empty floor; Cas pushed hard against Dean and grinned over his shoulder as he pushed open the first door visible and Dean quickly follows after him. He manages to kick the door close behind them before pulling his own shirt off. He looked over at the singer - who was toeing his shoes off and was already topless - the striking black ink stood out against his pale skin. The lines curved around his shoulder blades and followed to indent of his spine; connecting into the shape of wings.

"Like what you see?..."

Castiel didn't turn around as he spoke to Dean but he could easily see the singer tense the muscles in his back and pull his shoulders back as he stood straighter. Dean shook his head to drive away the impending nerves as he slowly walked up behind Castiel and pressed his bare chest against the singer's back. Wait. Why was he nervous? He has done the whole “sex with strangers” thing. This is no different. A simple night of great fucking and nothing else. But Dean could feel the nerves starting to creep into his bones and cause his hands to shake slightly.

Dean smirked as he slowly wandered over to the singer, he gently ran his fingers down Cas's sides before settling them on his hips as he murmurs low into his ear.

"How do you want this?..."

His voice sounded absolutely wrecked already just from the rutting against each other in the elevator. Dean can't remember the last time he grinded like this against someone - maybe when he was a teenager with some girl whose name he has long since forgotten. Being with a girl and pretending to be turned on by them was never as good as having two rough hands gripping his hips and a deep voice rumbling in his ear.

Dean needs to stop spacing out during times like these. Before he knows what is going; Castiel is kneeling in front of him with Dean’s hard cock in his hand and stroking almost teasingly. Fuck. How did he not realize he was doing that? He bucked his hips forward slightly, moaning under his breath at the maddening friction or lack of from the singer’s hand. Dean managed to snake a hand into Cas’s hair a second ahead of him engulfing the head of his cock with his mouth and… Shit… He teased at the slit with the tip of his tongue as he stared up at Dean with those fucking perfect blue eyes. Fuck – Dean was going to lose it if he kept staring into those baby blues for much longer.

Dean tilted his head back to stare up at the ceiling as a low groan bubbled up from somewhere in the back of his throat. This was another great thing of being with a guy, they knew how to give great head and.. Fuck! Castiel definitely knew what he was doing to Dean. The singer took him deeper into his mouth until the head of Dean's cock hit the back of his throat and the muscles fluttered around the intrusion. He held his hips still as Cas stroked the last part of his cock with his hand that he couldn't fit in his mouth. Dean had been blessed in one certain department and going by the impressive tent in his trousers, so was Castiel.

He tightened his grip slightly as a moan from Castiel vibrated through him and a shot of pleasure went straight through his spine. Dean cracked an eye open to catch a glimpse of the singer’s jeans open and his right hand furiously stripping his own cock. The red head was dribbling precome, making the slide of his hand create the most lewd sounds that had Dean gripping his hand in Cas's hair as he pressed his hips forward into the wet heat of his mouth.

Fuck. Fuck. Holy fuck a fuck.

Dean's brain has official stopped functioning and all of his thoughts were fuzzing over with pleasure. He could already feel the heat starting to build and settle low in his hips as each groan, moan and little noise slipped from his lips. He didn't want it to end so soon but Castiel kept hallowing his cheeks and tease the leaking slit with every bob of his head. It was getting too much to hold onto anymore, he was close to the edge now that a single thing could tip him over. He glanced down at Cas still on his knees with his eyes glued on Dean's face and. Fuck. Those damn blue eyes and that is all it took. A simple look into Castiel's eyes had his eyes rolling into the back of his head and his cock pulsing as he came hard into the singer's mouth. Dean glanced back down long enough to see Cas bucking his own hips into the tunnel of his fingers and coming equally as hard across Dean's lower leg and the hotel carpet.

Well, fuck. That was amazing and by the way Castiel happily drank him for every drop of come he could get from him - Dean liked to think the singer enjoyed it just as much as he did. But something was wrong. The atmosphere had changed whilst he was basking in the warm post-orgasm glow that was still lingering around as he pulled up his underwear and his jeans. Cas wasn't looking at him. In fact, he was completely blanking Dean's existence. Had he missed something in the last few seconds? They both came, hard. Dean was all happy and Castiel... Nope. His brain drew up a blank. Maybe he should say something.

“W-Was that… okay?”

Anyone could hear the uncertainty in Dean's voice but Castiel still would not look at him. The singer simply stood and arranged himself back into his trousers properly and busied himself with unpacking a small backpack he had brought. His face was still flushed that continued down onto his chest and up to the tips of his ears. Okay, this was not going as well as Dean though it would be going at this point. Did he do something wrong? Overstep a line? Should he apologize?

"I'm sorry?..."

He could see Castiel's shoulders drop as his hands stilled from sorting through the bag. Dean waited quietly for an answer as Cas pulled a clean t-shirt over his head and smoothing out the wrinkles that have formed from its tight confinement in the backpack. He blush still had not faded from his cheeks - it seemed to have deepened in colour - Dean simply did not understand what had happened to make Cas ignore him after what they had just done with each other. Dean watched quietly as the singer made his way to the door, pausing for a moment to look over his shoulder with those stupid blue eyes. They were glimmering with unshed tears which made the colour as vibrant as Dean has ever seen them.

“I am sorry Dean. I truly am sorry”

That was that. Castiel walked out of the door, letting it click softly behind him and left Dean in the grim stillness of the room. The evidence of what they had done was still at his feet and Dean was still utterly confused. But he had a small inkling that he would not be seeing Castiel Novak again any time soon. Job or not. He was going to be left here without an explanation and the haunting memories of Cas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comments.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	16. Straight Through the Heart

Castiel’s stomach sank as soon as he pulled the hotel room door close behind him. His head was still swimming as he made the rather short journey to the elevator, pressing the button for the ground floor of the hotel. As soon as the doors close, Cas felt his knees buckle underneath him and he threw out a hand to catch himself from collapsing on the floor of the elevator. All of the painful memories of hiding who he was came crashing down onto him all at once and caused Cas’s stomach to churn uncomfortably, making him gag slightly.

Why the hell did he walk out on Dean like that?

No one – except for a massive asshole – would walk out on someone as gorgeous as Dean that wanted to be with Castiel and he just walked out on him. Only a huge assbutt would walk away from someone who didn't care about what was in his pants or who he was pretending to be onstage. He is the biggest idiot in the world. Castiel knew that he had been practically pining for Dean over the last couple of days and now, when he has the chance to be that close to a man who wants him in return - he walks away. So

What the fuck was he doing?

He was barely aware of the elevator doors opening before him; Cas stood there for several minutes with his eyes glued to his feet in an attempt to keep himself from collapsing again or even puking all over his shoes. Everything around him was closing in and Castiel needed to get out. His steps were echoed on the solid wooden floor as he crossed from the elevators through the quaint foyer. There were only a few arm chairs placed scarcely around the main area of the room but there was a charming feeling about them – Maybe it was the detailed floral print each chair was adorned with or the soft texture of the covers. Castiel tried to ground his mind by brushing his fingers along the frame of a chair as he walked past one but he was too far gone in his own head.

The night porter was quietly dozing behind his desk with his hands resting on his rather large belly. To the left-hand side of his station was what seemed to be the hotel bar but it was completely empty apart from a younger man clearing rubbish that was still situated on a table near the entrance. Castiel did not make his presence known to the man and simply stood watching his deliberate movements passing from the table to a small trash can across the room and then back again. It was not until all of the rubbish had been cleared that the man glanced in the direction of the entrance and saw Castiel watching him closely.

“Holy crap Man. How long have you been staring at me like some vampire or something? You should wear a bell if you creep up on people like that.”

Castiel didn’t grant the man a reply, he dropped his gaze to the floor as his cheeks began to heat up in much unneeded embarrassment. The smallish man – who seemed to be sporting a rather grand looking mullet – looked completely dumbfounded by Castiel’s strange manner.

“Well – um.., They call me Ash around these parts but if you ever hear a guy ask for Ronnie then I am not here. Anyway man, I can see you are not really looking for my company tonight. So, I can leave the main stage light on for you, if you want?”

Cas nodded his head as he made his way towards the front of the bar until he reached the small raised stage with a relatively large piano and stool sat on top of it. There was even the lingering smell of stale cigars and wasted beer as Castiel perched himself on the piano bench. Castiel smiled slightly as he mind began to clear again with old memories of playing in bars - quite similar to this one in fact – when he was younger. He skimmed his fingers over the keys, feeling the dust from a lack of use sticking to his hands in the process. That didn’t matter. Castiel would drag himself through hell and back to simply use a piano like this again. To be able to feel each note vibrate through his fingertips as he sang would settle the ever growing storm in his mind. It had been years since Castiel had been allowed to play as well as sing; Michael did not see the attraction of playing such a large instrument when he could earn a living from just his voice.

“It’s the sensitivity of every key, Michael. I can play anything on the piano. I can’t sing everything you want.”

“People win money from hitting a note for 3o seconds on some pity talent show. You have talent and we need to show the world before a new act grabs the opportunity whilst you are playing something ridiculous like Mozart or… whatever. You are out there to make money, nothing more. Do I make myself clear, Castiel?”

That was a conversation that Castiel will definitely not be forgetting for the rest of his life. It was the same day that Cas learnt to listen to whatever his eldest brother told him and to obey Michael – no matter how ridiculous his orders were. It was certainly not the first nor the last time that Michael would force his "logic" upon a younger Castiel. He was only 16 when Michael found out - probably from Balthazar - that he was gay and it went down like a lead balloon. Castiel ended up with a fractured jaw and Michael had a black eye, split lip and a broken wrist - thanks to Gabriel stepping in to defend his little brother. Since then, whenever the subject of his own or anybody’s sexuality came up Michael would unknowingly rub his wrist as he spouted complete bullshit as usual.

Most days, Castiel could handle the occasional off comments to complete strangers, the odd word that made his blood start to boil and even the disgusted looks that Michael would send Cas when he thought his young brother would not notice them. After nearly 3 years of being subjected to these extremely prejudice and homophobic rants, Castiel gave into his brothers “teachings” and started an extremely unhappy relationship with the first girl who agreed to it. It just so happen to be Meg, who wanted to be a part of the band for the long run. From then on; in any interview when Castiel was questioned about his marital status, he would grin d his teeth before smiling and spouting a load of rehearsed lines about his kinship with Meg.

After all those years of hearing such demeaning language about himself from one of the people who should be supporting him, Castiel began to believe it himself slightly. Maybe that is why he left Dean standing there. Perhaps he panicked. Everything that he was forced to believe by his older brother was wrong and Castel had finally gained back some of his freedom.

He closed his eyes as he pressed his fingers down onto the keys to begin a soft melody that he learnt many years ago. Before his mind was flooded with the poisonous delusions of Michael. The smooth tune continued as he glided his fingers over the ivories with a faint smile on his face. All of the words he could hear in Michael’s voice in his head were being washed away by the gentle sounds of the piano. The very thing that started this brainwashing project of Michael’s now wiped away all of Castiel’s fears and the hesitation about being gay he learnt from his eldest brother. Castiel could be who he wanted to be now, he could be with whoever he wanted to be with and enjoy being with them. He had his life back - albeit a small portion of his life.

Castiel didn’t notice the tears rolling down his cheeks until a warm arm wound itself around his waist and held him closer to the body it was connected to. Dean. Cas did not even need to look away from the keys to know that it was Dean with an arm around him and trying to pull him closer. His vision began to blur even more as the melody faded into silence once more. It was all too much and it scared him to have this much freedom again. He turned slightly to wrap his arms around Dean’s shoulders and bury his face into the crook of the other man’s neck. In nearly three days, Castiel’s life had been flipped on its head by one reporter who caught his eye and made him rethink everything. His body shook as more tears came but Dean soothingly rubbed his hand in a large circle over Cas’s back.

Finally, the tears stopped and he sniffed quietly as his face was still half buried in Dean’s neck; by this time, Castiel was exhausted beyond measure and all he wished for was a warm bed and a rather warm journalist to join him for the night. Thankfully, Dean seemed to read his mind and dragged Cas back upstairs to their room without saying a word to each other. He was too emotionally drained to look at the mess they had made earlier - that was still on the floor. After helping Castiel strip down to his somewhat ruined underwear and ridding himself of his own clothes, Dean scooted into the bed and flings an arm over Cas's waist like they had been doing this for years. There was the thing that made Castiel's heart beat faster in his chest. They had not been doing this for years, they have barely known each other for three days and already he was thinking about being with Dean. That was a ridiculous thought. He must have been fidgeting or something because the next minute Dean is gently kissing the back of his neck whilst pulling Cas closer – if that is possible – to his chest.

“Go to sleep Cas. I’ll be here in the morning and we can talk then…”

That was all Castiel needed, the confirmation that Dean wanted to be here and that he didn’t feel obligated to stay with Cas. He could feel the warm waves starting to wash over him as he allowed his eyes to shut before slipping away into one of the deepest sleeps he has had in quite a while.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, Sweethearts. 
> 
> Please leave any comments for me below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	17. November Rain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just a little warning - There is a slur used in this chapter so you can skip it if you don't like reading them in fiction.

There was a large bubble of anger and frustration clawing its way up into Dean’s chest, burning into the pit of his stomach. A thin veil of red fell over his mind as the outrage grew until he began to shake where he stood. His hands balled themselves up into tight fists by his sides as he breathed heavily through his nose in an attempt to keep himself from tearing the room to shreds. Who the fuck walks out on someone he had just… done that with? He needed to break something. Dean glanced around the room quickly, looking for something that wasn’t too expensive that he could destroy to calm his nerves.

DVD Player? _No_

TV set? Was he trying to be Ozzy? _No_

Trouser press? How do you even use a trouser press? _No_

Dean started to feel the anger dissipate throughout his chest and leaving a strange tingly feeling in the tips of his fingers from clenching his hands too tightly. His shoulders slumped in a final surrender and he flopped down onto the bed; staring aimlessly at the ceiling. Dean’s jeans were still unbuttoned causing them to hang lower on his hips than they should normally.

Why had Castiel walked away?

Dean was certain that he had not overstepped his boundaries – well, in any way that he hadn’t already by his little sexual adventure with an international rock star. Dean groaned as he flung an arm over his face to block out some of the light. He could reach over to the bedside table to switch off the lights but that required moving. Dean needed to devote his energy to thinking what could have provoked Castiel into leaving so suddenly. Okay, so he was sure that it was not down to him. What did Cas say right before he left?

“I am sorry Dean. I am truly sorry.”

Why would Castiel say he was sorry? Was he sorry for walking out on him? Maybe. Dean scrambled his mind for anything else that could have happened to make Cas leave like that. Right, time to think outside the box.

Could he be sorry for sucking Dean’s dick like a fucking champ? _Definitely not._

Maybe he was sorry for enjoying himself too much.

Something clicked inside of Dean’s head. A small inkling. Maybe Castiel was sorry for enjoying himself and… freaking out about enjoying it. That must be at least part of the problem but why the hell would he be freaking out about… what they did?

He could hear the heavier rain hitting against the window on the furthest wall from the bed. It was hardly surprising to Dean that it was raining. It was the start of November and the air was getting cooler and cooler every day. A memory of a gut wrenching feeling of guilt and dread after having his first ever encounter of the sexual kind with another guy. Dean had been raised with a strict and extremely homophobic father – the infamous John Winchester – who practically beat into him and Sammy that being gay was wrong and they would be sent straight to hell if they even talked to “one of those faggots.” Crap.

Another memory crept into the forefront of his mind, the day he came out to Sammy after the poor kid had walked in on him and some guy called Patrick. That was a day he would never forget. His little brother being so supportive that Dean could live with the close minded attitude of his father. Dean remembered how terrified he was before coming out to Sammy. The fear of his father finding out that Dean was gay has kept him in the closet to this day. Maybe Castiel was feeling the same way right now. Perhaps he had been taught that being with another man was a sin too. Shit. Everything started to make more sense the longer Dean laid in the dark with the rain thumping against the glass pane; He needed to find Cas.

Dean yanked his jeans higher up his hips after rolling himself off the side of the bed and making his way to the door. He grimaced as he noticed the mess they had made that was still sitting at the end of the bed. He made a small mental note to clean that up later on – they didn’t need some bellboy finding that and selling his story to every magazine who were after a scoop on Castiel. He beat out a small rhythm on the wall as he waited - not so patiently - for the elevator. A few minutes later and Dean was striding across the lobby of the hotel. There was an older man with a large belly fast asleep behind the front desk with a small trail of drool hanging out of his open mouth.

Out of the corner of his eye, Dean noticed there was a light on the furthest part of the bar. There was a small raised platform that someone could call a "stage" with a scattering of tables and chairs arranged on top of and between the tables as if someone had gotten interrupted whilst cleaning the bar area. Dean began to slowly make his way through the haphazardly placed chairs being particularly careful not to make any sudden noises to break the concentration that Castiel was obviously giving the piano in front of him. The closer that Dean got to Cas and the piano, he could hear the soft music that he was playing. There was a warm yet sad feeling to the melody and Dean thought he recognized it from somewhere but he couldn’t pinpoint it.

He needed to let Castiel know what he was going through but he didn’t want to ruin the atmosphere that he seemed entranced in at the moment. Dean gently perched on the other end of the piano bench – still unsure if he was even allowed to touch Castiel. Dean took a chance and wound an arm around the singers waist to pull him closer and that was when he could feel Cas begin to shake and sob. All Dean could do was hold him through the emotional episode and comfort him as much as possible on this small piano bench.

It was only when Cas stopped shaking in Dean’s arms that he dragged the singer back upstairs. From his own experience he knew that Cas would need a quiet safe place after such an emotional ordeal. He quickly rid himself of his clothes, frowning at the mess still on the carpet at the end of the bed. Dean climbed in after Castiel and pressed himself against his back. It was slightly similar to the position they were in earlier but this was different. This wasn't about bring each pleasure, this was simply about comfort and warmth. Dean felt the muscles of Cas's back contract and he could barely see him grinding his teeth in the dimly light. He pulled Cas closer, turning him slightly to press him against his own chest.

“Go to sleep Cas. I’ll be here in the morning and we can talk then…”

The warmth of sleep started to creep into Dean's bones quicker than he imagined it would that night. The rain had quietened down and the dull pitter-patter lulled Dean into a state of calmness and relaxation. He tightened his arm instinctively around Castiel as he started to fall asleep. This was definitely not what he had thought being on tour with The Rebellion Garrison was going to be like at all.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comments in the comment-y part.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	18. Telephone Line

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Then Thunder echoes in accord  
> as from the sky, cold rain is poured.  
> And silent shadows start to shrink  
> into a night of blackened ink   
> ~ Andrea Dietrich

Nope. Nope. Nope. It was too fucking early to even think about being conscious. Castiel mustered enough energy to crack open one eye but he grimaced as he read the time as ‘3:58am’. Way too early to be awake. A white flash blazed across the windows of the hotel room and cast eerie shadows onto the bed and floor. Castiel blinked again just in time to hear a large, low rumble of thunder which made him flinch backwards, further into the bed and under the covers.

Normally, he was fascinated by thunderstorms. Castiel found them to be hauntingly beautiful in a strange poetic way. They were in a sense beautiful and graceful; the contrast between light and dark could be taken into deep analysis. There was another louder rumble of thunder shortly followed by another flash of lightning. Ever since his first thunderstorm as a child; Castiel had become fascinated with the elegance and strength behind lightning and the deep, guttural sounds of thunder. He could wax poetically for hours about the brightness of lightning against the normally dark sky. But, at this very moment, he was too exhausted to be bothered about the deeper allure of lightning bolts.

He shifted under the weight of an arm draped over his back as he twisted to gaze at the face of the sleeping form next to him. A lightly tanned masculine set of features that had seemed to be dusted with freckles upon more freckles. Castiel unconsciously moved closer into the man’s body in an attempt to count the countless number of freckles in the dim light. Wait, what was this guys name again? Sean? No. Dean. Yes! Dean Winchester.

Oh fuck. No.

The memories of what they did together flickered in Castiel’s mind and before his mind could catch up with his body; he was standing at the door of the hotel room with his phone in his hand. Shit. Calm it Novak. He took a deep breath as he made his way quietly over to the bathroom that was attached to the room. It was nothing fancy; a simply white tiled bathroom that included a shower, bath and a double sink. He gently clicked the door shut behind him as he sat on the edge of the bath with his phone in his hand, thumbs dancing over the screen. He needed to call somebody. Castiel brought up his lists of contacts and bypassed the first few names that appeared in the alphabetized list. There was no way in hell he was going to call Anna or Balthazar. He paused for a moment over Crowley’s name but pressed Gabriel’s contact information instead and pressed the ringing device to his ear. It rang four times before his brother picked up.

“Castiel?”

“Hello Gabriel”

“Where the hell are you?” Gabriel spoke in a hushed tone of voice so Castiel assumed the other members of the band were still asleep.

"I am not too sure but I am okay. Well, we are okay"

"Wait, what do you mean we?"

He could hear some rustling and the distinctive sound of candy wrappers being dropped onto the floor followed by a short curse word.

"You didn't! You did not sneak off this bus to fuck some reporter in a cheap motel"

"First of all, it's not a cheap motel. It's actually quite nice and no, I did not sneak off to fuck Dean. I asked him to follow me but my intentions were innocent... at the time"

"Oh little brother. What did you do?"

Something inside of Castiel broke as he recounted everything to Gabriel including the dirtiest blow job Castiel has ever given to a guy and the echoes of Michael's voice in his head. He hung his head in shame once he was finished, awaiting a reply from his brother.

"Well shit Castiel. You are majorly fucked there. You know Balthazar is seriously going to bust a nut when he notices you're missing. right?"

"Yes Gabriel but I am just so tired of touring. Yes, I know what I was signing on for when we started the band but seriously. It was either sneak off the bus or collapse on stage due to exhaustion"

"Balthazar would rather you do that then sneak off. What the hell are going to do when he does notice and starts ringing everyone in the lower states to find you?"

Castiel pressed the heel of his right hand into his left eye willing the impending stress headache away before it got too painful.

"I don't know. I am just going to stay off the radar for a few days. Get some real rest."

He could hear Gabriel's frustration in his voice as he sighed heavily before speaking again.

"Okay, I will keep calling with updates about his majesty and things this end. Just keep out of sight. Oh and Castiel?"

"Yes Gabriel?"

"Bang that reporter once or twice before you get back. I think you both will need it"

Cas grinned wide as he could hear the humour return to his brothers voice.

"I will Gabriel. I will see you soon"

After their farewells to each, Castiel laid his phone on the closed toilet seat next to him. He could still hear the thunder rumbling off in the distance with the occasional flash of lightning illuminating the doorway back into the main hotel room. What was he going to do? He could not hide here from Balthazar forever and if he was being honest with himself, Castiel loved being on tour. It was just exhausting after two long years of almost continuous touring around the world. He could use a break from it. Hell, they all could. Even Meg.

Castiel could feel the need for more sleep slowly creep back into his body causing his limbs to feel heavier than they usually do. He dragged himself back to bed and as careful as he could be this early in the morning, climbed in alongside Dean again. The reporter had turned over whilst Castiel was on the phone and was now facing the opposite wall with his back presented to Cas. Along his broad shoulders, Castiel could make out more freckles and a little lower stood a prominent tattoo. He could feel a small rush of excitement shoot down his spine as he gingerly traced the outline of a gun which seemed to be a Winchester on Dean's left shoulder blade. Maybe this reporter wasn't as normal and boring as Castiel first thought he would be. He grinned wide as closed his eyes and drifted off to images of lightning dancing across freckled skin.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Leave any comments for me in the right section.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	19. The Temptress

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meg's POV

_**~ 12 Years Earlier ~** _

The unnecessary noise from the other preteens were grating to Meg’s ears as she leaned against a pillar to the main building of the English department. She found herself, most lunchtimes simply leaning against a pillar or a wall and observing the ludicrous behaviour happening before her. A gaggle of girls from her drama class passed her, keeping their voices low and throwing judgemental glances over their shoulders at Meg. ‘Idiots’ she thought to herself as she thumbed through her bag to her own copy of “The Greatest Gift.”

Meg had read it cover to cover nearly every month since her mom brought it home by mistake one day but never returned it after Meg become engrossed in the short but enticing story. Years later, her mother finally showed her the film with James Stewart but Meg still loved the poignancy of the book.   
Meg’s attention kept being diverted from the text in front of her by the sound of faint sniffling coming from somewhere. After a few minutes of trying and failing to read her book; Meg shoved the book back into her bag with a frustrated grumble and rounded the corner of the building.

Sat on the edge of the raised curb was some black-haired kid in an oversized trench coat that the sniffling was definitely coming from. Meg rolled her eyes as she flopped down beside the stick of a person enveloped in the large coat.

"Crying only wettens faces and reddens eyes.No problems were ever solved with tears so you shouldn't start thinking that now, Clarence. Hmm, interesting."

Meg leaned back slightly to study the boys face more closely. There was dark bruising around his left eye that seemed to already be healing, no more than a week old probably. His eyes though, his eyes. Fuck. They were brighter than most people's eyes unless they were wearing coloured contact lenses but there was no way in hell that this kid was wearing any.

"Crying normally makes most people look like hideous toads but your eyes pop more when they are shimmering like that, Clarence. "

The boy next to her looked bewildered and ultimately confused as he sniffed away the final tears.

"My name is C-Castiel. N-Not Clarence..."

"I don't care what your name is, just stop with the waterworks and take a look around you."

Castiel must have thought that Meg meant in the literal sense of the saying as he furrowed his brow and took a long, searching look around the both of them before staring straight back at Meg.

"I don't see anything spectacular that should stop me from emitting emotions of sadness"

Meg rubbed her temple and rolled her eyes.

"You are obviously not looking for the deeper meaning. What I meant to say Clarence is that you need to stop dwelling on whatever little trivial issue has you crying like a hormonal schoolgirl over her latest crush and take a look at the bigger picture. None of that crap is going to matter when we are older so it is best not to give a crap about what people say or think about you. Just tell them to kiss your ass and be happy"

She took a minute to catch her breath as Meg leaned back onto her elbows; it was rare that she was considerate to anyone other than herself but Castiel – or whatever the hell his name was – seemed to be a fellow outsider in this hellhole and freaks should stick together as much as they can. It’s not the first time this year that Meg tried to make a “friend” and it was going much better than last time – it took her three days to rinse all of the milkshake out of her jacket.

“Is that what you do?... To stay happy in this… environment”

“If you don’t give a shit. No one can get under your skin like these egotistical creeps seem to get off on so easily”

There was a lull in the conversation as Castiel fiddled with a button on the sleeve of his overcoat and Meg stared up at the sky, it was starting to get more overcast. Rain was on its way for certain – rain that will wash away what’s passed. She shook her head slightly, Meg really needed to stop listening to musical soundtracks before bed.

“Will it make me happy? Not caring about people’s opinion?”

Meg sighed as she raised an eyebrow in disbelief he was actually asking her that; after her long monologue.

“Of course it will and I can help you. Not caring is my speciality if you couldn't tell already, Clarence"

Castiel cocked his head to the side as if he was impersonating an inquisitive puppy.

"You seem to care a lot, just not necessarily about the same things other people care about..."

“Anyway, before you start reaching for your guitar and singing fucking Kumbaya and plaiting each other’s hair or some pathetic crap like that. I need to get to my next class. I shall be seeing you around soon Clarence and remember. Take no shit and you’ll be happy”

As Meg stood and took a step towards to dismal looking art block, something seemed to be caught on her bag, stopping her from moving another step forward. She turned to find Castiel holding the lower strap of her schoolbag tightly.

“Thank you but I still do not know your name and it is considered rude not to introduce yourself properly”

Meg's eyebrow raised high and she quietly chuckled to herself. She had to bite her tongue to stop herself from telling Castiel to fuck off or kiss her ass but those too innocent eyes were melting her chilly little heart. She sighed a took a step closer, gently holding onto Castiel's chin to lift his face closer to her own as she grinned wide. Some people may compare her smile to a sly cat or a psychopath - either one was correct

"Fine, my name is Meg Masters and I will kick your ass if I find out someone else has kicked yours before I met you again. Got it, Clarence?"

The threat was thin but the look on Meg's face made her voice more intimidating than she actually meant it to be. Her eyes had grown dark and yet they still gleamed with a sense of mischief. Castiel quickly nodded and swallowed hard as Meg imitated his earlier head tilt. She winked down at him and sauntered off towards the art building.

Meg’s hands tightened instinctively around the main strap of her bag and smiled to herself, she felt… happy? Confident? She couldn’t exactly pinpoint the emotion that caused her fingertips tingle and a strange fluttering sensation deep in her gut. As she passed the same gaggle as girls that laughed at her before; Meg bared her teeth and hissed to her amusement as they all squealed in fear and probably horror that someone would act in such a manner towards other human beings.

Meg spent the next hour in the back of her art class, smiling to herself and only half-listening to her teacher, Mr Todd. She seemed lighter knowing that someone else in the universe understood what it was like to be an outsider. She hardly noticed when someone threw a blob of clay into her hair and she did not even flinch when a rather stupid boy shouted “demonic lesbian” in her face.

Meg was happy that she had someone that should could consider a friend, a comrade in arms and definitely a fellow freak that could love her and that she could love as well. That was Castiel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, my Lovelies.   
> To be honest, I forgotten completely that I had written this chapter. 
> 
> Please leave any comments in the comment-y section.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	20. Early Mornings

Everything was warm and soft. Dean felt as if he was floating in mid-air whilst surrounded by cotton wool. Each one of his limbs were so heavy that they felt they were being pulled through the bed by invisible wires.

But something was off, something innocent was offsetting this peaceful moment. He cracked an eye open and grimaced as he spotted a clock on the table beside his side of the bed. _6:05am_. Dean groaned louder than necessary as he rolled onto his stomach and buried his face as deep as he could into his pillow with his arms curling around it. He could distantly hear low rumbles of thunder and the light taps of raindrops against the large window panes to the right of him. He smiled tiredly into his pillow as he settled back underneath the thick duvet and everything was back to being warm and soft.

However, Dean's eyebrows knitted together when he shifted his hips to get into a more comfortable position and realized that the early morning wake was causing some majorly impressive morning wood. He moaned quietly into the pillow as he gently grinded his hips into the mattress, he kept circling and rocking himself into the bed as he used the pillow to muffle his groans of pleasure. Just then his brain decided to kick itself into gear and reminded him that he was definitely not alone in the bed. Dean stilled instantly and held his breath as he heard a rough, deep voice murmur from somewhere beyond his pillow.

"You don't have to stop. You seemed to be rather enjoying yourself"

Dean bit his bottom lip as he lifted his face from his pillow and found a rather grumpy but fucking gorgeous looking Castiel looking straight back at him. He could already feel his face starting to heat up with embarrassment but that did nothing to calm down his hardening cock. Castiel's hair was sticking up in various patches on his head and his eyes were as blue as Dean had seen them in the short time that they had known each other.

"I-I was just trying to get comfortable"

Castiel simply hummed and Dean could feel his cheeks, somehow, getting hotter as the singer shuffled further into his personal space. He wasn't sure what Cas was planning on doing until a warm hand wrapped loosely around his cock and began to stroke slowly. Dean let his eyes shut as a quiet moan slipped from his slightly opened mouth.

"Is this better?"

Dean could only nod his head as his right hand curled tight into his pillow and his left trail down Castiel's back and across his shoulders just touch him. He could not get enough of how soft Cas's hand felt and in little to no time, Dean was pressing his hips forward into the loose tunnel that Castiel had around his dick. Castiel was peppering Dean’s chest with small, fleeting kisses and purposely dragged his teeth across one of his nipples as he tightened his hand around the base of his cock to stop him from finishing before they had any real fun.

“I want you to fuck me Dean”

Wait, what? Did Dean just hear that? Was he having some kind of stroke? His heart came to an abrupt stop before pounding loudly in his ears again as he pulled himself back from Castiel slightly to look the singer squarely in the eye.

"Unless, you do not want to but..."

Castiel smiled and started to stroke Dean's cock again, keeping his voice low as he spoke.

"It does seem you like the idea of fucking me"

As if on cue, Dean's cock twitched hard in Cas's hand as precome began to drip from the head. Dean bit down on his bottom lip hard as he dragged Castiel forward, with a hand on the back of his neck, into a bruising kiss that left Dean’s toes curling at the bottom of the bed. There was nothing in this world that could compare to the feel and the taste of Castiel’s mouth.

He ran the tip of his tongue along the back of the singer’s teeth which made the most erotic groan erupt from deep within Cas’s chest. Fuck. Dean wanted to make Castiel make that sound again and again, there was no way he was going to get tired of it. He pulled back from exploring the singer’s mouth to catch his breath and to come back to reality. If Cas wanted Dean to fuck him, then he was going to be sure that he got fucked properly.

“On your front”

Dean’s voice was forced more than it should have been and slightly trembling but who could blame him when he had Castiel Novak’s hand wrapped tightly around his cock. However, the singer rolled onto his stomach and turned his face to the side to raise an eyebrow at Dean, hiding his beautiful hands underneath his pillow.

Dean took a moment to steady himself as he straddled the backs of Cas’s thighs and ghosted his fingertips down the middle of the singer’s back, stopping only to gently massage Castiel’s lower back with his thumbs. When a slightly frustrated sound came from further up the bed informed Dean that he should get to it. He shuffled completely off the bed as he pulled Cas’s boxers off this long legs and kissed his way back up until his lips found the small crease that separated Castiel’s thighs from his ass and lord. What an ass! He must be a runner, Dean thought to himself as he sharply bit on the fleshiest part of the muscle, using his tongue to soothe the red mark.

Dean always enjoyed this part more than most people do but it was the best way to understand how a person was going to react during the actual sex part of the encounter. Some people were shyer than others and some were more vocal. Castiel was definitely more vocal that some of the guys that Dean has been with in the past but his face was buried deep in a pillow that was doing a good job at muffling those perfect sounds. He was plotting the destruction of that damn pillow as he pulled Cas's hips up so his ass was beautifully presented to Dean.

“Tell me if you want me to stop”

Dean smiled to himself as he spread the singer’s cheeks just a little more before leaning forward and dragging the flat of his tongue across the puckered ring of his muscle. He could hear a loud gasp followed by a louder guttural groan above him. Dean took that as a very positive sign so he plunged straight in – wrong phrasing perhaps – using his tongue to circle, tease and slowly fuck Castiel until his jaw was locking up and the singer was begging him to fuck him already.

"D-Dean... Fuck... Please. Fuck me! God, need it so b-bad..."

Dean grinded himself on the back of Cas's leg momentarily as he reached over to the bedside table to retrieve a condom and a rather small bottle of lube. He nestled both of the items by Castiel's right knee as he passed his tongue over the fluttering muscle once again, admiring the sight of the entrance trying to clench around Dean's tongue. He covered two of his fingers and easily slid both of them into Cas, which was followed by a higher pitched moan from the singer. Just as he did with the ass eating, Dean started off slow to ensure that he would not hurt Castiel in the process.

It didn’t take long until Dean could stretch Cas easily with three fingers and the singer was pleading with him again. He positioned himself behind Castiel and wiped the excess of the lube onto himself. Dean carefully lined the head of his cock with Cas’s entrance; his hands holding onto his hips tightly as Dean slowly inched his way inside of Castiel. Finally, after restraining himself, Dean had bottomed out and let his head fall back with a groan falling from his lips. Castiel’s tight heat was sending his head into a tailspin and he felt like he was going to drown in the heat. Dean looked up at the back of Cas’s head which had been dropped back onto the pillow.

“Ready?”

“So… F-fucking ready…”

He gently began to pull his hips back until the very tip of his cock was still inside of Castiel then pressing himself back into Cas. Dean bit on his bottom lip as he began to pick up the pace more, his hands holding like vice grips on the singer’s hips. There was surely going to be some bruises on his hips later on but by the noises Cas was making each time that Dean brushed his prostate, he did not care in the slightest. Dean was not being the quietest of people either. Loud groans and some surprising noises were falling from his mouth every time Castiel clenched tightly around his cock.

Dean was immediately snapped out of his headspace as he heard a familiar loud shrill that was his mobile phone. This could not be the worse time to try and call him. He groaned in frustration. He glared at the offending item that was vibrating on the bedside table.

“Fucking phone. Slightly busy here…”

"For fuck sake"

In one swift movement, Dean’s phone was flying across the room and smashing against the hotel room door. If he was in any right frame of mind, he would be cursing Castiel from now until next Tuesday. But the little shit – well, not so little – decides to clench tightly around him again and that nearly breaks him. Dean concludes that they are both done with this “slow and steady wins the race” bullshit so he uses one of his hands to press the top portion of Cas’s body into the bed as he begins to pound into the singer as hard and as fast as he can go.

The angle was more than superb as with every rough thrust, Dean grazed Castiel’s prostate and it wasn’t long until they were both sweaty, panting and so close to the edge. He could feel sparks of pleasure at the very base of his spine and the tight coil in his gut getting tighter and tighter.

"C-Cas... fuck. So fucking good... So close... W-Wanna hear you scream when you come..."

That was the straw that broke the camel's back and moments later, Castiel was crying Dean's name at the top of his lungs as he came hard, making a mess of the bed underneath him. As well as his back arching severely, Cas clenched tightly around Dean and that is all it took for him too. A single thrust later, he was calling out the singer's name as he came deep inside of Cas.

“F-Fuck… Cas…”

Dean’s arms had failed him but he managed to pull out of Castiel before collapsing on the bed next to him. The singer was face-down in the pillow, obviously trying to catch his breath again. Cas soon turned his face to smile tiredly at Dean.

“Well, fuck me…”

“I just did.”

Dean chuckled to himself at his little joke, running a hand through his hair that plastered itself to his forehead in sweat. He grinned over at Castiel, who wasn't as amused at the joke as Dean had been. His eyes flickered down to the mess they made on the bed and made a mental note to take a shower later on.

"Was I good or was I good?"

"That was so much better than just good..."

Dean hummed in response as he felt himself beginning to fall asleep again. They should really get up and take a shower but exhaustion overtook the rational and logical part of his brain. He held out an arm and Castiel seemed to understand what Dean meant as he cuddled in closer with his equally sweaty head on his shoulder, an arm draped over Dean’s chest. As he shut his eyes and began to fall asleep, Dean could swear he heard someone singing but maybe it was his imagination.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comments in the comment-y bit.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	21. Wake Me Up Before You Go

Castiel tiredly eyed his phone on the bedside table. It had pinged to life when he received text messages and a couple of e-mails but there was no point in checking them now. It was either spam from online stores or electronic reminders for upcoming charity events in my calendar. Cas was the worst morning person and that was an understatement to say the least. He had only just woken up again after the early morning rise with Dean. He hummed quietly to himself as he felt a slight twinge of pain from his hips. It had been a while since Castiel really enjoyed himself with another person like that. Although many people crossed his path that were more than compatible; they were never able to catch his attention like Dean has done.

_8:39am._

Every time Cas hit the central button on his smartphone, the large numbers glared at him. It was like the luminous digits were taunting him and his complete lack of sleep. Urgh. Cas could scroll through the several messages that Gabriel had sent him since they spoke on the phone but undoubtedly they would only be photographs of his dick or some ridiculous dessert.

He huffed as he tried to extract himself from the heavy arm that Dean had draped over his waist to shuffle his way into the attached bathroom with his phone in one hand and a pair of underwear in the other. The cold tiled floor was a contrast to the plush carpeting of the main room. It wasn't until Castiel stepped under a steady stream of hot water that is body started to relax. The warmth from the water slowly seeped through his muscles; his shoulders loosening in an instant. Seconds and minutes ticked by as Castiel stood with his forehead pressed against the cool tiles and his eyes closed. All he wanted to do was sleep. To sleep, perchance to dream. He could curl up into a corner of the shower and sleep under the water with the steady thrum on his back.

Cold hands gently appeared on his hips; it startled Castiel out of his shower thoughts. Dean was pressing his entire body against Cas's back and sharing the heat from the shower. It was obvious that Dean had a certain thought on his mind.

"I woke up and heard the shower. I thought you could use some company."

Castiel smiled tiredly as he pressed himself back onto Dean's hardening cock, grinding slowly as his fingers try to gain the little purchase from the tiled wall. His limbs were feeling heavy from the delicious steam curling around their entwining bodies and the exhaustion from a long night. Cas was barely aware of Dean grinding himself against his backside. The soft moans from the other man were swirled around Cas’s ears and brought a bigger smile to his face.

He liked when people could take their time and simply revel in each other’s bodies. When the light, soft touches could bring such pleasure to both of them. Castiel craved in the slow build-up of moments like this. But, at this moment in time, he also craved sleep. A hand – much warmer than before – snaked around to the front of his body and began to slowly stroke his hard dick. He pressed himself into the loose tunnel of fingers that surrounded him.

"D-Dean... Can we take this to the bed?"

Castiel’s voice echoed onto the tiled wall; the only other sounds were the small noises escaping from Dean and his own mouth. Soon, the noise from the shower ceased as Dean turned the water off and reached for some towels that were just outside of the cubical.

Cas's head was still swimming as Dean wrapped the towel around his waist and guided him through to perch on the edge of the bed. His skin was cooling as he laid back against the duvets. He shivered as he felt the other man guide his legs open and wet kisses being pressed to the inside of his thighs. Castiel raked his fingers through the longer hair on the top of Dean's head; it was still damp from the shower. However, any other thoughts that were lingering in his head were certainly gone when Dean wrapped his fingers around the base of Castiel’s cock and his tongue toyed the vein on the underside. The moment Dean's mouth engulfed the head of Cas's dick, his hips bucked unexpectedly into the wet heat of the man's mouth. It didn't take long until Castiel was groaning as dirty as porn star and his hips were lifting off of the mattress.

The heat in his lower stomach was growing hotter and hotter until his vision began to turn white as with a final cry; Castiel came hard down Dean's throat with his fingers twisted in his hair. His hips twitched until his own dick was soft again and exhaustion was overtaking him. Cas tried to reach out from Dean but his arm was too heavy to lift from where it fell by his side. He attempted to ask the other man about his own release but when he cracked his eyelids apart, he couldn't see Dean in front of him anymore.

Castiel wasn't sure how he managed to crawl underneath the covers; he was sure Dean had tucked him into them. Although, said man had taken his place against Castiel's back with his arm draped back over his waist. The world was comfortably warm again and Cas could feel the tiredness dragging at his mind, his eyelids becoming incredibly heavy. He felt safe as he shuffled slightly to get further under the covers. He wasn't sure but Castiel would swear he felt Dean smiling on the back of his neck as he let the exhaustion overtake him and forced him to sleep.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as ever, for reading! 
> 
> Leave any comments below for me.   
> Love ya! 
> 
>  
> 
> MTS


	22. Welcome to my Nightmare

_The first thing to worm its way into Dean's mind was the smell of heavy smoke and it painfully clawed at the insides of his nose, stinging his nostrils sharply with every intake of breath. It was similar to the deep scent of a bonfire during mid-November that filled the darkened skies but it was so much denser. Then, the faded image of bright orange flickers started burning behind Dean's eyes and the aggressive flashes of heat were far too familiar. The warmth from the flames was settling deep into his bones as he looked down to his occupied arms, a small pink face glaring angrily and confused back up at him, tears welling in the baby's wide eyes. Everything seemed to be drenched in a strange sepia tone as if seen through an old photograph or a clever filter on a camera lens but it felt so real. In the back of his mind, Dean knew that this was just an echo of a memory. A dreadful and haunting memory but still just that - He was not back in the fire that consumed his childhood home. But, he couldn't help that his heart began pounding harshly against his ribcage and adrenaline started to surge through his veins, making his head spin and almost float._

_"Dean! Get your brother out of here! Now!"_

_A deep rumbling voice broke through the tight atmosphere from somewhere, demanding and almost frantic as it screamed words over and over again. He instantly recognised that it belonged to his father, John but he couldn't see him anywhere. There were more images that flooded into view, a long corridor of a house with thick smoking blanketing the floor and clung around Dean's legs._

_"Boy! Take Sammy outside and run! Run as fast as you can!"_

_Dean tried to twist his body around to seek out the source of that voice but his body was moving on instinct and carrying him with the baby out of the burning house quicker than he thought was possible. He squeezed his arms around his brother's tiny form as Dean held Sam against his small chest and sprinted from the house. A cough tickled at the base of his throat and his eyes were watering from the smoke but Dean didn't stop until he was well outside of the house and a high-pitched scream rang in his ears._

_"Mama?..."_

_Dean stopped in his short strides and turned back towards the house, a bubble of worry expanding in his chest at the thought of his mom being hurt or worse. There were shockingly vivid flames were trapped by the upper-level windows and darker smoke filled the sky above the house. He couldn't move his feet anymore and his mouth filled with invisible marbles to keep Dean from yelling out again. The images slowly began to dissolve and Dean could barely register someone in a uniform pulling his little brother from his arms, red and blue streaked across his vision and another scream cried out. It wasn't as high-pitched as before but more guttural and it was more likely made from a man._

~ ~ ~ ~ ~

Dean's body finally jolted him awake and his natural reaction was to scramble from the bed and cross the room before his brain processed where he actually was and the fact that he was safe. It had been over 20 years since the fire but the crippling panic still sat in the middle of his chest, suffocating and choking with every passing second. He can still feel the curtains of smoke clutching around his ankles and dragging him back into the house. Dean leant back against a dresser opposite the bed for a second as his left hand carded through his sweat-drenched hair.

"Just a dream... a dang nightmare..."

He quietly repeated the words to himself, eyes falling shut as he tried to ignore the lingering fear on the fringe of his mind and the exhaustion of having such a dream brought with it. Dean's jaw clenched and heart plummeted into his feet as he felt a strong but gentle hand skim across his shoulder-blades in a soothing touch. He could barely lift his head but he mustered enough energy to throw a tired smile to Castiel by his side and his eyes stayed closed.

"Dean... You alright there?..."

There was obvious concern in Cas' voice and something deep in his chest ached as Dean hauled his eyes open again to look wearily up at Cas. His dark hair was spiked messily in different directions, a sure sign that he had just rolled out of bed and his blue eyes were softer somehow, less judgmental and more caring. Maybe or maybe not. Dean tiredly wrapped his arms around Castiel's waist and pressed his face into the crook of the singer's neck. Normally, Dean would deal with his nightmares on his own and he would simply brush it off if anyone asked him about them but it had been several months since his last nightmare about that night. He could still faintly hear his mother scream and his arms tightened around Cas' waist as he tried to block the memory from resurfacing into his head completely. The last time that Dean had a nightmare too similar to this one; he had to drink half a bottle of whiskey and run 3 miles before he returned to his apartment to collapse into a restless sleep on his sofa.

"Dean... Come on, let's get back into bed and take a second to breathe..."

It was too late for Dean to object as Castiel was already curling his fingers around his wrist and gently guiding him back to the bed. He complied silently as Cas settled Dean comfortably against the pillows and tucked himself tightly to the side of Dean's chest. The air in the room began to ease as Dean kept his eyes trained on the painted wall behind the dresser and the door to the en-suite bathroom which was slightly ajar from the earlier shower with Cas.

"I-I... I don't usually... h-have nightmares... like that..."

It was a lie and an blatant one too, Dean's voice was so quiet that he was unsure that Castiel had heard him until an arm draped across his stomach and the singer tried to cuddle closer to Dean, even though there was no space between them. A small hum was mumbled into the skin of his bare chest and his own shaky hand lightly skimmed over Cas's shoulders to hold him still against his chest. The moment happening between the two men might be viewed as too intimate for a couple who have only just met each other but it seemed right like it was second nature to them.

_I'm okay. Just a nightmare._

The words repeated, over and over again inside of his mind in an attempt to calm the frantic pace of his heart and quieten the rumble of thunder still in his ears. Dean let his eyes flutter close again as he mimicked the steady breathing of the body pressed against his side and he could feel himself starting to slip back into sleep with every deep inhale and exhale. He tried to fight against falling back asleep but his own body betrayed him and Dean quietly let slumber take him again as Castiel quietly stared intently at the same painted wall across from the bed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading, Sweethearts! 
> 
> Please leave any comments below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	23. Getting to Know You - Part 1

The room was too bright as Castiel cracked an eye open, glaring weakly at the open curtains and he grumbled a curse under his breath at the mere existence of the daylight. Cas can't remember, even as a child, leaping from his bed in the morning and welcoming the world with open arms. His mornings had always consisted of mumbled swears, narrowed eyes and grabby hands towards any source of coffee or food. It had gotten even worse whilst touring with his brothers who delighted in playing a cruel game called " _How to wake up Castiel_ " which sometimes ended in violence. Although, that was normally nothing more than an alarm clock launched at their heads or whatever happened to be within his reach.  _Alarm Clock, Water Bottle, Lamp..._

An annoying loud knock came from the main door of the room and Cas pulled the covers over his head, hoping that the person would simply go away. Sadly, it didn't work and another knock rang through the quiet room.

"I swear to Mother Mary on high..."

The bed dipped to the left of him as Dean sauntered his way over to the door, Cas peaked over the edge of the covers and marveled in the sight of Dean's boxers that clung snugly to his ass. Wait. When did he put underwear on? Castiel scrubbed a hand over his eyes, flicking his mind back through the most recent memories and he was pretty sure that Dean was completely naked. A small bubble of panic started to rise in his chest and his hands tightened around the edges of the covers. Had Dean been trying to leave and sneak out before he woke up? In the back of his mind, Castiel knew that that was bullshit but he couldn't stop the thought from growing as he lost himself in the further reaches of his mind.

"Hungry?..."

Cas was pulled from his internal maze by the sleep-gruff voice from the foot of the bed and he scooted up to lean back against the headboard, smiling tiredly at the silver tray that Dean was hovering over. A small warmth spreads across Castiel's cheeks as he let his eyes slowly roam down Dean's body, taking in every faint line of hard muscle and a sprinkling of golden freckles that underline tanned skin. Cas was pale as hell, thanks to the lack of sunlight from endless touring and he would give anything to spend more time just relaxing in the sun. At this point, he was shameless staring at the beauty of Dean's body but Castiel no longer cared and a small smile played at the corners of his mouth. Somewhere in his head, the thought that Dean was going to leave was still lingering but Cas didn't want to mull over it anymore.

"Cas?..."

Shit. A pair of bright green eyes looked at him curiously and maybe, a little confused. He smiled tiredly at Dean as he nodded his head and chuckled quietly as his stomach took the opportunity to vocalize its distress about the lack of food, cutting through the awkward silence. Dean smiled down at the covered food but it seemed... strained? Cas hummed happily as he was handed a plate of food. It was pile high with toast, berries, oranges and some small pastry that was too buttery but it was fucking delicious. They ate in a strangely comfortable silence with their shoulders brushing against each other until Castiel leaned forward to place the plate back on the tray. He leaned back against the headboard with a satisfied hum, his eyelids felt too heavy and Cas stretched his arms above his head, groaning low. It had been far too long since he felt this happy about just lying in bed and eating mediocre room service.

"So...."

Right. Yes, we needed to have a talk about... things... Cas shifted uncomfortable against the headboard, covers pooling around his waist and he saw that Dean was staring down at his hands that were folded in his lap. Castiel knew that Dean deserved an explanation about the whole 'walking out' incident that happened the night before but he found it hard to talk to anyone, full stop. He thought that it would be nearly impossible to openly talk to someone that he had known for less than a week. Well, Cas thought that until he opened his mouth and words started tumbling out with his permission.

"When I was younger, a lot of people tried to take control of my life. My parents, Michael, Meg and even Balthazar. All of them tried to tighten their grips around my world and shape me into their perfect image of me. Michael shaped me into a world-travelling singer who beds every woman that he meets and someone who would never even think about giving a guy another look. A modern day Mick Jagger, I think is how Michael described it once to me. I hated it and I loathed the looks or comments that he would say if he ever caught me with another guy."

Castiel chuckled under his breath but it sounded more sour than anything else as he paused for a moment. Dean was no longer gazing down at his lap, instead, he was staring right at Cas and that made the singer's stomach tie into small knots. Why the fuck did he just say all of that to a fricking reporter? A wave of realization hit Cas like a bucket of ice water as he remembers the whole reason why Dean is even touring with them. He was just another reporter, trying to get the story of the century and nothing more than that. It hurt to burst the bubble that shielded them from reality for a short while but this wasn't some epic love story or a long-winded romance escapade. This was the real world and reporters lived for getting the next big scoop before anybody else. However, this hard brush with crippling reality didn't stop Cas from continuing to let his mouth run too fast for his brain to process the words that were being said.

"I had spent so much of my life, under the thumb of someone and changing my true self to fit their expectations of me. Anyway, one of Michael's "views" was that anyone who would even think about having sex with someone of the same gender, deserved to be beaten up and trust me. That is not an empty threat."

He let the room fall silent again for a few second as he jaw began to ache, maybe a phantom pain from one of Michael's "behavioural adjustments" that didn't end too well. Castiel didn't dare to even try to sneak a guy past Michael after that incident for a couple of weeks with only his right hand for company. It had been a hard couple of weeks - pun intended - but it didn't last too long and soon, Castiel was back to seducing to tough guys with big hands.

"Last night was the first real night that I have said 'fuck you' to everything that my brother drilled into me about how I was the one who was wrong and how I was the one who needed to change. I mean, I had been sleeping with men without Michael knowing ever since he left and Balthazar took over the management but... It didn't seem too rebellious or anything. Then, last night happened and we fucking ditched the tour bus in the middle of nowhere and dove into the first hotel that we could find. That's fricking nuts!"

Castiel turned his head to stare at Dean with wide eyes and the reporter simply stared back with a slight tilt to his head as he listened carefully to every single syllable that passed from Cas' mouth, His expression was unreadable to Cas, a mixture between acceptance and understanding. It was so strange to have the opportunity to talk to someone so candidly about life.

"I-I can't really explain it anymore than I-I got too overwhelmed by everything... The ditching. The kissing. The grinding. The blowjob. Everything that Michael had said and taught me had suddenly crashed down onto me and I needed to get out of there before I puked on your shoes or something..."

There was a small smile playing at the edges of Dean's mouth but it quickly faded from sight again as both of them leaned back against the headboard of the bed. A small consistent ticking sound came from the alarm clock on the bedside table and it lulled Castiel into a strange meditation as he patiently waited for Dean's answer to his whole case of verbal diarrhea. He was not expecting the story that slowly poured from Dean's mouth.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as ever, humans! 
> 
> Leave any comments in comment-y section below for me.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	24. Getting to Know You - Part 2

Before this assignment, if you had told Dean that he would sneak off a tour bus in the middle of nowhere, fuck Castiel Novak into next week and listen to how much his brother Michael had control over his life, he would laugh in your face. But, here he was in bed with Cas by his side whilst the singer lets small pieces of his private life break through the barriers that he had put up to everyone else. Dean would be lying if he said that he wasn't confused by Cas' willingness to talk to him and he would, also, be lying if he said that he didn't want to fill Castiel in on his own personal life. This was meant to be easy. A simple task to follow a band around for a couple of months then leave with nothing more than a story and maybe a drunken mistake like a tattoo on his ass. But, no. Life is never that easy.

Dean took a deep breath through his nose to try to calm the sudden nerves that rose in his chest and to ease the knots that tightened in his stomach. He never needed to explain his nightmares to anyone apart from the occasional guy who decided to spend more than one night with Dean or Bobby after finding him frantically typing away in the office at 5:45 am after a particularly bad one. But, even then, he would be vague and avoid the most obvious details about the disturbing dreams. He stared down at his hands that twisted the edge of the covers nervously between his fingers. A warmth spread across the back of his neck as he could feel Castiel still staring at him, those stupidly blue eyes were too wide when Dean risked a glance and he can't bring himself to look back at the singer again.

“I-I understand what it's like having somebody else taking control of everything that you do or they tell you which people you are allowed to hang out with and the ones that you're not allowed. My Dad..."

Dean cleared his throat and quickly decided to change the subject back to his nightmare before he fell down a rabbit hole that took way too long and too much effort to explain. He hadn't spared his father a second thought in several years and God knows that he isn't going to start thinking about the old man now. Dean swallowed harshly as he brought his thoughts back on to the matter at hand.

"When I was about 4 or 5, there was a big house fire. I only woke up because of the smoke and by the time that I got out of bed and found my Dad, the house was pretty much falling apart around us. He handed me Sammy and told me to run so I did. I just kept running until... We later found out it that it all started from some faulty wiring in my brother's nursery and my Dad won some settlement but it was never enough to replace my Mom. I lost her to that fire, Cas and I will never forget that night."

He coughed quietly into one of his hands to hide the slight tremble in his voice as Dean clearly heard the high-pitched wail of his Mom in the back of his mind and it brought a hard lump to his throat. Dean clenched his jaw tightly, letting a silent moment pass before he felt confident enough to speak again without his voice shaking.

“ I was telling the truth when I said that I don't usually have nightmares like that. Its been months since I had one about the fire and honestly, I should have seen it coming but... Yeah... That's what my nightmare was... Just an old memory that likes to pop up and bite me in the ass."

Dean could see that Castiel was still staring at him with a strange intensity that made the faint blush in his cheeks rise up more and all he could do was stare down at his hands, clasped tightly in his lap.

"Your father... Did he..."

There was a questioning tone to Cas' voice, curling through the softly spoken words and Dean nodded his head slightly.

"Dad survived the fire, by some fucking miracle but he... he was never the same after that night. Neither one of us were exactly the same after losing mom but... Fuck. He was pretty much silent for most of the time but when he did speak..."

The heavy feeling returned to his chest as Dean tried to think of a simple way to explain away the short temper and coarse words of John Winchester. It would be a lie if Dean said that his father was the perfect man. A big fucking lie. But, he couldn't deal with the look of pity that he was so sure would fill Castiel's eyes as soon as he mentioned his Dad's lack of parental prowess. It had been so long since Dean even entertained the idea that his father could possibly conjure up anything apart from hate and sharp-tongued comments about him and there were still times that he could hear the deep rumble of John's voice in the back of his mind.

"He had an idea of what a real man should be and I didn't fit that ideal of his. I am gay and I have a job that doesn't require grease or hauling large hunks of metal across a yard. Y'know, a real man's job. I went against everything that he wanted me to be in this world. So did Sammy kinda... apart from the gay part which is probably why John brought it all down hard on me and let Sam live his life happily."

Dean smirked down at his lap but there was no humor in it and he leaned back against the headboard as he was sure that there was nothing else to say on the subject of John and his Grade-A parenting. He took a deep breath, fingers relaxing in the edge of the bed covers and Dean finally managed a small look over at Castiel. The singer was staring back at him with the same intensity as before but there was a small tilt to his head that softened the sharp focus of his eyes. Dean narrowed his brow in confusion as he couldn't find the slightest sign of pity in Cas's eyes, not a single trace of it. They stayed like that for a moment, just staring at each other and if there was anyone else in the room, they would find it more than strange.

Cas was the first one to look away, a shrill ringing dragged his attention to his phone that was sat on the bedside table and Dean could hear him grumbling swears under his breath. He grumpily answered the phone with a gruff "Hello" and Dean quietly excused himself to the bathroom, carefully closing the door behind himself before he slid down the length of wood to the floor. Fuck fuck fuck. Dean took several gulping breaths, his chest suddenly feeling too tight for his lungs and his heart frantically beating against his rib-cage. Fuck. Did he actually tell Castiel Novak about his stupid nightmares and his father?

_No._

This had to be another nightmare. It had to be because he would never tell someone that he barely knew, let alone a Novak, anything about his private life. Dean could feel an immense headache creeping behind his right eye as he stayed huddled against the bathroom door for a few moments but he, at last, hauled himself into the shower. He turned the water onto a excruciating high heat, one that tinted his skin bright pink the second that it met his body and created thick curls of steam that easily filled the room. Dean faced away from the shower head, allowing the thick beads of hot water to lash against his back and he let his mind drift into thinking about nothing. His body found some comfort in the shower, his mind untangling the mixed threads of thoughts and memories. When he was a student, Dean discovered how relaxing a simple shower could be and he relished in the beating of the water against his bare back. A loud rapping at the door brought Dean back down to reality and his quickly shut off the water to hear the voice on the other side of the door better.

"Dean! Come on, we gotta leave!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as ever, for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comments below for me  
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	25. Running Scared

Castiel scrambled to pull on his jeans, a slight shake in his hands making it nearly impossible to button them quickly and he huffed as he had to still search for his shirt. It had been flung on top of the dresser adjacent to the bathroom door and Cas hammered at the door again.

"Dean! For the love of all things holy on this Earth... Come on!"

The desperate edge to his voice didn't slip Castiel's notice but he chose to ignore it, focusing his attention to hauling both of their backpacks onto the end of the bed and toeing on his shoes. This was definitely not the first time that Cas needed to leave a hotel room in a hurry and he was certain that it was not going to be the last. Dean, finally, emerged from the bathroom with a towel hanging too low on his hips and Castiel took a second to admire the vast span of tanned skin, a few thoughts immediately sprang to his mind and he could feel a soft warmth dancing along through veins as his eyes stayed glued to the journalist's thick biceps and solid chest. It was strangely intoxicating to simply be able to admire the strong body of another guy without Balthazar or Michael shrieking their backwards thoughts into Cas' ear.

During the short time that Castiel had spent away from the band and that God forsaken tour-bus had lifted an unseen weight from his shoulders. He was able to be himself without fear of being ridiculed or Gabriel spraying lemon juice into his mouth whilst he was blissfully asleep. He was, at last, free to express himself. However, there was still a faded twinge of sadness in the back of his mind. Cas would never admit this to their faces but he did love his strange family and he did enjoy spending time with them. His childhood was littered with fond memories of Gabriel and Lucifer pulling foolish pranks on Michael, and Castiel often wished that he could spend hours upon hours with either one of his elder brothers like that again. On the flip side, being stuck in a small bus with them for weeks and weeks at a time without any form of a break should be classed as torture and therefore, illegal and immoral. Not to mention, Michael had practically abandoned the family and saw Castiel as no more than a one trick pony that needed to be showboated. He didn't see Cas as a brother anymore, just a piece of meat that needed to be displayed.

"Earth to Major Tom?... Come in Major Tom..."

A warm hand hesitantly touching Castiel’s shoulder brought him crashing back to reality and he stretched out an arm to the duffel bags and threw a clean shirt at Dean’s bare chest.

“Here… All of your crap is still in your bag, right?”

Castiel didn’t spare another glance at Dean as he stretched across the bed to grab his phone and hurriedly tap out a message to somebody who replied almost instantly. He stilled, letting out a shaky sigh and the frantic pace of his thumbs lessened as Cas stared down at his phone. He read and reread over the latest message for a few moments before pocketing the phone and turning back to Dean with a tired smile.

“Cas? What’s going on, Man?..”

The tired smile curled upwards a touch more and Cas bowed his head slightly before sitting on the edge of the bed. It dipped slightly under his weight and shortly, the bed sunk a little lower as Dean joined him. The journalist was still clutching to the white towel around his waist and the shirt that Cas had thrown at him in his right hand. Castiel didn’t dare to look at Dean, knowing that his attention would be dragged from the topic at hand and to the admiration of the fellow man’s physique.

“Apologies Dean… Gabriel called me this morning and said that Balthazar was heading back to find me and I…”

An invisible block in his throat stopped the rest of the sentence, shame about his unnecessary panic trickling into his chest and Cas ran a heavy hand through his hair. Fuck. This was one of the numerous things that Castiel had marked down on the “Never tell a reporter” list but this was Dean Winchester. They had only known each for – fuck – 3 days, still Castiel felt that he could talk openly to Dean and whisper all of his worries with no fear or hesitation. However, there was still a voice in the back of his head, screaming at him to stop and to keep his mouth shut. It sounded weirdly like Michael.

“I-I panicked… about what Balthazar might do… or s-say if he actually found me…”

The overwhelming vulnerability in his own voice made Castiel feel like everything was closing inwards and he closed his eyes for a second, heart thrumming against his rib-cage and he risked a peek at the man sat next to him. Dean was staring back at him, eyes welcoming and honest, no obvious judgmental expression on his face.

_He was just… listening._

Cas narrowed his brow slightly at the reporter and tilted his head, regarding the journalist closely. The bubble of panic that sat in the middle of his chest and threatened to burst at any second was slowly deflating, tension seeping from his shoulders and his heart falling into a more relaxed rhythm. He let a moment pass between them before standing from the bed, turning his back towards Dean again and he fumbled in his pocket to retrieve and tap away at his phone again. Aside from the two new messages from Gabriel, there were several missed calls from Balthazar and one from Meg too.

“We still have to leave and pretty quickly but Gabriel is gonna stall Balthazar as long as he can so we can chance at a head start to the next gig.”

Castiel expected some kind of answer from Dean but none came, just a simple huff of breath and the gently pad of feet on carpet as the reporter dressed quickly and ensured the rest of his belongings were in the duffel bag. Castiel busied himself, ordering a rental car and pacing in front of the hotel room door. He half-expected for Balthazar to burst through the door with a full SWAT team, throwing cans of tear gas and dragging him back to that fucking tour bus. It only took a few minutes for Dean to get completely ready and sling one of the bags over his shoulder, the corner of his mouth quirking up in a soft smile at Castiel. Again, the knot of anxiety loosened in the singer's chest and he returned with an equally small smile.

They didn't say another word as they made their way downstairs, glancing at each other briefly as they entered the small elevator and a faint blush crept into Castiel's cheeks as he let his mind wander back to the share moment in the elevator when they turned up last night. Although, he was pretty sure that he could pull Dean into a tight embrace and kiss him until the doors opened on the ground floor, the air in the lift was stiff and tense unlike last night. The realization didn't hit him until he was typing out a quick reply to Gabriel and Cas threw an arm out to grip Dean's shoulder.

"I broke your phone..."

 _Fuck. Well done Novak._ Cas dropped his head and groaned at his own stupidity, the familiar inklings of a migraine settling behind his right eye. No wonder Dean was acting so cold this morning. He turned on the spot to look up at the slightly taller man, squeezing the hand on Dean's shoulder and sighing heavily before speaking again.

"Dean... Fuck, I am so sorry... I can get you a new phone in the next town or something..."

The reporter simply nodded but Cas could feel his shoulders loosen and he was rewarded with an easy, wider grin from Dean.

"Thanks for offering Man but I can wait a little while to grab one. Its no biggie.."

In the back of his head, Castiel knew that it was certainly a "biggie." It seemed that that phone was a lifeline to the reporter. Dean spent every free moment, tapping away at his phone, writing notes and things like that. Cas felt the weight of guilt piling onto his shoulders and even though, Dean assured him again that there was no need to get him a new phone. Castiel made up his own mind to pick Dean up a cheap burner one at the first Gas station. The doors to the elevator made a small bell sound as they opened and the two men made their way to the front desk to pay for the room and quickly found the rental car already outside, waiting for them both. The rental car was nothing spectacular - thankfully - and he was sure that nobody would recognize them whilst they're driving it.

Cas tilted his head quizzically at the echoing sounds of his ringtone as he slid easily into the driver's seat, brow furrowing slightly as he tossed their backpacks into the back seats before digging his phone out of his pocket again. The large caller ID identified the caller as Gabriel and Cas swiped his thumb across the screen to accept the call, pressing it to his ear.

"What is it Gabriel?"

Castiel didn't mean the harsh edge to his tone but that permanent knot of anxiety started tightening in his lower chest again and his fingers gripped the edges of the phone harder.

_"I would start hauling ass if I was you, Bro. Balthazar is fuming and I've done my best to stall him but he is gonna be on you like flies on shit when the bus has air back in its tires."_

There was faint yelling in the background that was followed by a short swear word from Gabriel and rustling of something like a jacket or coat. Cas plugged one ear with his finger as he tried to listen more closely to the aggravated, he could tell it was Balthazar but he could not make out any of his words. He glanced over at Dean, who was looking just as concerned from the passenger's seat of the car. Another string of curses from Gabriel as the loud voice grew closer to the phone.

_"Anyway, keep me updated on whether you tapped the sweet reporter or not and I'll keep Balthazar from putting a hit out on you..."_

"Thank you, Gabriel. You have no clue how much I need this break from him and... everything.."

_"Oh trust me, little bro. I know a lot more than you think I do... Fuck! Okay, goodbye and good luck, prodigal son..."_

Then he was gone. Castiel listened to the silence for a second before pocketing his phone again, shrugging his shoulders at the more than confused look on Dean's face. The singer couldn't find the energy to start explaining what may actually happen to both of them if Balthazar found them. He was sure that Dean had seen plenty of Balthazar's temper whilst chastising Gabriel before they got on the bus for the first time. Although, Cas deeply loved all of his brothers, there was certainly a part of him that loathed how angry or loud Balthazar could get if he did something wrong or stepped out of line.

"I guess that we better get moving then.."

Dean's voice brought Cas back to reality before he could get too lost in his own thoughts and he nodded his head with a small hum. It was still raining outside but the thunder had stopped for now. However, on the horizon, he could see dark and intimidating clouds that threatened something worse was headed for them and Cas could feel his stomach flipping nervously as he peeled smoothly away from the pavement. The gentle rumbling of the car engine filled the quiet atmosphere as neither man knew what to say in that moment, each other them were silently letting their minds process the confusing circumstances that led them to driving a rental car to Tacoma from Kansas.

A strange bubble of laughter rose in Castiel's throat and he could feel Dean stare him, dumbfounded by the - possibly - inappropriate chuckling that came from the singer but Cas didn't care. He had spent most of his life, holding his tongue and not laughing at strange moments like this and he would be damned if he was going to hold back now. The low laughing continued for 10 whole minutes as it slowly faded into a more than comfortable silence. Dean fiddled and tweaked with the car's radio until it stopped on a channel that played only Classic Rock Hits. Cas sighed under his breath as the frantic feeling of having to flee the hotel began to dissipate and he could breathe a little easier as more picturesque scenery rushed by the windows of the car. Small houses with small white picket fences and larger buildings that boasted community functions and fundraising events for the local animal association. He began to imagine the love and affection felt by everyone in this community and something heavily sat in his chest. Cas' hands tightened on the steering wheel as he brought his full attention back to the road in front of him but he did not miss the look from Dean that he managed to catch out of the corner of his eye. Castiel kept his eyes forward and mind clear of any thoughts other than not crashing the dang rental car and how he was going to spend his next 3 days. He sneaked a glance at Dean as an extremely specific idea came into his mind and a smirk broke across his face.

This was going to be fun.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading, as ever, my lovelies! 
> 
> Please leave any comments for me below.   
> Love ya 
> 
> MTS 
> 
>  
> 
> Ps. I will be going back once all of the chapters are uploads to rearrange a few of the chapters and edit everything so please don't be alarmed if things do change


	26. Talk to Me

The start of the drive was quiet, but not uncomfortable. The radio stayed low in volume whilst the miles slowly crawled with familiar songs purring through the speakers and Dean had his notepad open on his lap, scribbling basic notes about the singer next to him. If he was being honest with himself, Dean couldn't focus all of his attention on actually beginning the article and he gnawed on the insides of his cheeks as he tried to distract his own mind from slipping back to the night before. Both of them had laid bare, figuratively and literally, with each other and something about sharing the story of losing his mom in the fire didn't sit right in Dean's stomach. He wasn't the one that was meant to be sharing his life-story, Castiel was.

"You think too much..."

Castiel's eyes were still on the road ahead of them as he spoke to Dean, sneaking the occasional glance over the passenger side of the car before returning his focus in front of them. Dean simply huffed in response, trying to write something but words fail him and he grumpily shoves the book and pen back into his bag on the floor by his feet.

"Well, You don't think enough."

Dean's voice was clipped and short, an echo of John Winchester's similar snarl ringing in his head as he crossed his arms over his chest and stared out of the window. Outside was bland with nondescript buildings passing by them but, beyond the structures, Dean could see the lingering presence of the brooding storm. _Something was going to break soon._ Dean was being stubborn - he knew that - but he could already see himself starting to share too much of himself to Cas and that wasn't kosher. _No._ He was a reporter and he was supposed to keep his distance during this assignment. You were meant to be able to detach yourself completely from the subject that were reporting on and not let yourself become personally involved, in any sense of the term.  

"That was a little rude but... not untrue."

Dean huffed again, letting his arms fall down into his lap and his head lulled back onto the headrest of the seat. _It was rude_. Dean was usually polite, with manners that had been practically beaten into him, but this assignment was big and he didn't want to fuck it up. He was sure that Bobby would fire him on the spot if he did anything that put the reputation of the magazine on the line; including sleeping repeatedly with the subject that he was meant to be reporting on. 

"You're thinking again."

No duh, Asshole. Okay, even Dean had to admit that that thought was more than a little rude and he let his shoulders drop whilst trying to relax but his mind was whirring, over and over again. 8 months may seem like a long time but Dean was sure that it would disappear in the blink of an eye and then, he would have to hand in the pieces to Bobby. Would Bobby fire him for running away with Castiel? He can't lose this job. Dean had fought too hard from being a local sports reporter to get here and he couldn't afford to lose his position. No. Dean was a solid writer. It was all going to be fine as soon as he finished getting a handle on everything.

"Sorry, didn't mean to sound like an asshole."

Castiel took his eyes off the road for a millisecond to glimpse at Dean, an easy expression that sported an easy smile that didn't reach his eyes before turning back again and Dean felt the weight from his shoulders easing while attempting to keep his mind from over-thinking it all. The little town had been gone for a mile or two and the road faded into a freeway instead of quiet streets.

"It's quite alright. Is there something on your mind that you wish to discuss?"

For someone who could make John Bonham blush, Cas spoke like a character straight out of a Charles Dickens novel and the corner of Dean's mouth quirked upwards in a small smile while shaking his head.

"No, Man. Just... Thinking about work."

"Oh."

Oh, indeed. Out of the corner of Dean's eye, he could see that Castiel's grip on the steering wheel tightened before relaxing again, his eyes flicking over the view in front of the windshield and, if he could read minds, Dean would be sure that Cas had forgotten about his reason for being here. Maybe he did forget that Dean was simply here to write about him and not run around the country with him.

"What's your favourite ice cream?"

A crease appeared between Castiel's eyebrows at the seemingly weird question from Dean and the singer, again, glanced over at him but Dean simply shrugged his shoulders. When he was younger, Dean would ask dumb questions or played 20 questions with Sam whenever a situation became too tension at home and it worked so he thought that he would fall back on the old habit.

"Banana and Honey. What's yours?"

Dean crinkled his nose up slightly at the singer's answer. He was half-expecting Cas to say something like Bat's blood or eye of toad, not something so sweet and... normal.

"Mint Choc Chip will always be the king of Ice cream."

That earned a small chuckle from Castiel who shook his head and Dean readied himself to defend his choice but Cas didn't argue it. Instead, he began tapping his fingers against the steering wheel to a beat that definitely didn't match the soft song that was being played on the radio. Dean allowed a few more minutes of silence pass between them before he ventured that it was safe to ask more questions.

"Last meal choice."

A slightly morbid question but it was the one that was always hotly debated in the Winchester house. 

"Cheeseburger, fries and a strawberry milkshake."

Castiel didn't miss a beat in answering that one and, again, Dean was slightly taken aback by his answer as he was thinking that Cas would be a strict vegan or someone who only ate carbs every third Tuesday in the month. But the suddenness of his answer told Dean that he was more to the singer and he should probably give Castiel the benefit of the doubt instead of expecting absurd answers from him. For a whole hour, Dean and Cas shared this simple back and forth of plain questions and soon, Dean found out that Castiel is named after an angel, like most of his brothers, due to his religious parents, had a pet guinea pig named Dio whilst growing up and absolutely loathed poison oak because of a prank pulled by Gabriel when he was a toddler. That story had Dean laughing the loudest with an arm wrapped around his middle and he nearly missed the amused but pissed expression on Cas' face.

"Wait... Is that why you have a song called Beware the Oak leaves?"

The singer nodded whilst he diverted all of his attention to the road for a second, reading a road sign that flew by the window before turning into the far left lane then he relaxed again. Dean didn't have enough time to read the sign and a small part of him knew that he should be paying more attention to where they actually were but he found the stories that Cas was telling him to be more amusing.

"Okay then... Since we're doing the whole tit for tat thing... Tell me a story about your childhood."

Dean's jaw tightened and the laughter drained from his system, a chill running down his spine at the purely innocent question from Cas. His childhood had been... different. John Winchester was a different kind of father to his boys and that definitely stood out when either of the Winchesters talked about growing up. Shit, Cas was looking at him more now as Dean hadn't answered and his mind frantically scrambled for one of the happier memories of his early life.

"When I was 10, my brother Sammy was convinced that I was really Batman so instead of telling him the truth, I jumped from the roof of our garage to show him that I could fly. I ended up breaking my wrist and Sam burst into tears."

Then John yelled at the top of his lungs at Dean for being so reckless before hesitantly driving him to the emergency department but Dean decided to leave out that part of the story. No one should know the full extent of John's temper and Dean quickly tried to change the subject to keep his own mind from slipping away to look for the darker memories.

"You said that you had a guinea pig?"

Cas was squinting at the windshield in concentration but nodded his head again, his mouth moving as his internal monologue was trying to work out which exit to take next and Dean waited until they took the second one to speak again.

"We had this stray dog that would come up to our house sometimes and, of course, Sammy got attached and wanted to keep her. He even gave her the name Hetfield to get on my good side about it."

Dean was slightly thankful that he didn't have to explain the reference to Cas and he chuckled as he remembered the way that Hetfield would immediately roll onto her back for a belly-rub when she spotted either of the boys sneaking down in the middle of the night to sneak her food. Again, there was a bitter ending to that story and Dean didn't want to share it with Castiel so he remained quiet for a few minutes.

"What happened then? Did you get to keep her?"

Fuck. Dean's head dropped with his eyes closed as he should have known that Cas was going to be curious and ask a follow-up question about Hetfield. It was his own fault for bringing her up.

"N-No... Our Dad saw that she was limping and we had to say goodbye."

That was glossing over the truth but, after all of this time, Dean still found it hurt to think about that stupid dog. Hetfield was sweet and she absolutely loved both of the boys, even when they couldn't sneak her any food. But, John had to see her whilst she was limping and next thing that both of the Winchester boys knew was that their father had a shotgun in one hand and her makeshift collar in the other one. Why did it still hurt to think about Hetfield? Dean shook his head and leaned forward to turn the radio up, needing to distract his head from the pain of losing one of his first best friends. Castiel simply looked over at him for a second then he continued his gaze on the road in front of their car that had shifted from the freeway back into the streets of a town. The dark clouds that had been looming over them the whole morning were still hovering close by and Dean wasn't surprised when, in the blink of an eye, heavy thunder roared above them and fat droplets of rain began to hit the car. Perfect. It was the perfect weather to match his dark mood and, for once, Dean didn't care about the loud noise from the sky and he definitely didn't care about Cas' hand on his knee.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Leave any comments down below.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	27. The Rebellion Garrison Album List

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Below is the listing for the 4 albums that The Rebellion Garrison have released at the time of their world tour, including a recording of a live performance. Some are covers and some are original songs. The Titles of the albums are in CAPS. Plus, underneath each song is the member or members of TRG that wrote the song.

### Chapter Text

**DEBUT ALBUM - SAY HELLO!**

1\. Crawl Through the Vines - Original Song   
_(Castiel/Samandriel)_

2\. Epic - _Faith No More Cover_

3\. Chop Suey - _System of a Down Cover_

4\. Stinger - Original Song   
_(Castiel)_

5\. Hear my cry, Hank - Original Song   
_(Meg/Lucifer)_

6\. Kill The King - _Rainbow Cover_

7\. What Are You Doing Here? - Original Song   
_(Gabriel/Lucifer)_

8\. Fortunate Son - _Creedence Clearwater Revival Cover_

 **BONUS TRACKS**   
9\. Stand Beside Me, Brother - Original Song   
_(Gabriel/Lucifer)_

10\. Raise The Night - Original Song   
_(Castiel/Meg)_

11\. Bring Back the Sun - Original Song   
_(Samandriel)_

12\. Carved for Perfection   
_(Castiel/Gabriel)_

~ ~ ~

**SECOND ALBUM - CALL MY NAME**

1\. Think about It - Original Song   
_(Lucifer)_

2\. Beware the Oak Leaves - Original Song   
_(Castiel/Gabriel)_

3\. Coward - Original Song   
_(Castiel)_

4\. Striptease - _Hinder Cover_

5\. The Lost - Original Song   
_(Meg/Gabriel)_

6\. Call my Name - Original Song   
_(Castiel)_

7\. Flight of Icarus - _Iron Maiden Cover_

8\. The Joker's Grin - Original Song   
_(Samandriel)_

9\. Feather of a Crow - Original Song   
_(Lucifer)_

~ ~ ~

**THIRD ALBUM - LET ME GO**

1\. Master of Puppets - _Metallica Cover_

2\. Say Your Peace - Original Song   
_(Castiel/Gabriel)_

3\. Cry - Original Song  
 _(Meg)_

4\. Where's Your Romeo? - Original Song   
_(Gabriel)_

5\. Let Me Go - Original Song   
_(Castiel)_

6\. The Bitch's Reign Will End - Original Song   
_(Castiel/Gabriel)_

7\. Ramble On - _Led Zeppelin Cover_

8\. The Sandman Diaries - Original Song   
_(Samandriel/Meg)_

~ ~ ~

**LIVE RECORDING OF PERFORMANCE IN VANCOUVER, CANADA.**

1\. The Lost _(Intro)_

2\. Where's Your Romeo?

3\. Raise The Night

4\. The Bitch's Reign Will End

5\. The Joker's Grin

6\. Stinger

7\. Striptease - _Cover_

8\. Cry   
_(Acoustic)_

9\. Flight of Icarus - _Cover_

10\. Think About It

11\. Epic - _Cover_

12\. Feather of a Crow

13\. Stand Beside Me, Brother

14\. Crawl Through The Vines

15\. What Are You Doing Here?

16\. Bring Back the Sun

17\. Call My Name

18\. The Sandman Diaries

19\. The Lost _(Outro)_

**ENCORE SONGS**

20\. Let Me Go

21\. Coward

22\. Beware the Oak Leaves

23\. Say Your Peace

24\. Hear My Cry, Hank

25\. Kill The King - _Cover_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading this, slightly, random chapter, but the idea popped into my mind and I NEEDED to write it. 
> 
> Leave any comments below for me.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	28. I Can't Decide

Dean didn’t seem to acknowledge Castiel’s hand on his knee until the car turned into a gas station and the reporter drew his legs close to passenger door to force Cas’ hand to drop back onto his own thigh, his gaze still turned to the window. Cas couldn’t miss the sight of a small frown that was tugging at the corner of Dean’s mouth but he decided to leave it unquestioned for now, clambering out from behind the wheel to pump gas and he spared the occasion glance to Dean still inside of the car. It was never returned.  _Maybe he was upset about Castiel asking more about his dog._ Cas let his mind tick over whilst he busied himself with paying for the petrol as well as a cheap phone to replace the one that he broke and a  _slightly_ disgusting bag of jerky too. It was nearing midday and they should really find a proper establishment for lunch, but until then, a bag of jerky would happily keep their stomachs quiet. 

"That'll be $35.99." 

The kid behind the counter had greasy hair stretching down to his shoulders and he barely lifted his attention from his mobile phone to ring through Castiel's items but this isn't what caught Cas' attention. It was his t-shirt. It was the album art for  _SAY HELLO!_ and, by the fading of the once black material, it was definitely loved. Castiel couldn't help smiling wide as he passed over his card and he was half-expecting the teen to recognize him but he was too engrossed on the screen in his hand, eyes flicking whilst he thumb scrolled and scrolled past hundreds of posts. 

"I really like your shirt, by the way." 

Cas was trying his best to hide his broad smile when the kid passed his card back and glanced down to his own front then, finally, he looked up at Castiel. A small crease formed between his brows before the confused expression dropped away into one of amazement with his mouth ajar and eyes wide.  _There it is._ The first time that anyone had ever recognized him out in public; Castiel couldn't believe it and, when they asked to take a picture with him, he was more than happy to comply and he is always thrilled when someone wants to take a picture with him apart from directly after a gig.  _Does that make him, as Gabriel would say, a douche nugget? Probably._

"Someone slipped 'shrooms in my ramen. That's the only explanation." 

The teen seemed to be completely shocked by Castiel's presence in front of him but the singer shook his head, slightly assured that the kid couldn't possibly function on a working till if he indeed had been involuntarily taken any type of drugs. 

"Dude, you're fricking Castiel Novak." 

A small chuckle rumbled through Cas' chest as he awkwardly stares down at his own feet for a second. He had never been good at interacting with fans outside of gigs due to not being able to rely on the "douche-y" stage persona without getting his face slapped or stories written about him on social media.  _Too much publicity could be a bad thing._

"Yeah, that's me. It's always awesome to meet a fan." 

The words felt a little forced but the sentiment behind them certainly wasn't strained in any way; the real fans of The Rebellion Garrison were always loyal and understanding but could sense bullshit from a mile away.  _Something they demonstrated clearly when Lucifer decided to leave the band._ They didn't settle for the false statements that the management would release about anything going on with the band, unlike the "false fans" who were simply following the herd and jumping on the hype train of a band whose lead singer was  _somewhat_ attractive. 

“Dude, is it cool if I get a picture with you? My girlfriend is seriously not going to believe me when I tell her that I met you.” 

Castiel nodded and took a step around the counter as the teen fumbled slightly with his phone, bringing up the front camera to capture the image of both of them. Out of the corner of his eye, Cas caught sight of Dean sat patiently in the car and, for a moment, his chest seized in panic.  _That's right, they were still running from Balthazar's witch hunt._ Cas forced another wide smile before stepping back to collect his purchases from the counter and a small warmth eased the tension from his chest at the joyful look on the teen's face. 

"Thank you so much. Like, really dude. Thanks." 

This is why he really loved the attention that the band was getting now because he could make people genuinely smile by simply taking a picture with them or saying hello whilst passing through their workplace. The money, awards, groupies didn't matter when Cas met a real fan and saw how much his music meant to them. 

"You're more than welcome. I'll catch you on the flip-side." 

Castiel half-jogged back out to the car after his short goodbye to the teen and he tried to pass the cheap phone to Dean, nudging the reporter's arm with it. He was still sulking but the darkness from his expression seemed to shift when he turned to look at the object by his arm then up at Cas, eyebrows pinched together in confusion. 

"I'm sorry about breaking your other phone and I will replace it when we're near a larger town but... I-I thought you might want to confirm with your boss or whoever that you're still alive and haven't been kidnapped or anything." 

There was meant to be humor behind his voice and Cas was slightly relieved when he caught sight of the tiny smile tugging at Dean's lips as he took the device from the singer, turning it over in his hands before switching it on. 

"Thanks Cas." 

Dean's voice was quiet, contrasting the loud laughter that had passed between them during the morning but, Cas, again, didn't question it and he nodded his head whilst pulling away from the gas pump. The kid was standing outside with his phone firmly pressed to his ear and Castiel risked a wave to him, chuckling when the kid enthusiastically waved back then disappeared inside of the store to speak to whoever on the other end of the phone.  _Maybe he shouldn't have taken that picture._ If it was posted to social media then people would be able to tell where he was. The thought hadn't struck him until now and, instinctively, his hands tightened around the steering wheel but Cas tried to soothe his frayed nerves.  _He couldn't turn a fan down like that._

"Who was that?" 

"What?" 

Castiel's didn't turn his gaze away from the windshield to look at Dean but his grip did loosen on the wheel whilst he drove the car back onto the freeway, glancing into the rear-view mirror with his tongue caught between his teeth in concentration at merging with the other traffic. 

"Who were you waving to?" 

Oh. Dean still sounded a little cold to Castiel but, this time, the singer did turn his gaze briefly to his passenger with a soft smile before returning his attention back to the busy road ahead of them. 

"He was a fan that recognized me. I think he might have been an original one too. He had a  ** _SAY HELLO!_** shirt on." 

The fact that the kid was wearing a t-shirt with their first album on it meant nothing on the length of time that he had been a fan of The Rebellion Garrison but he had a feeling that the teen might have been one of the lasting fans. There weren't many of them left after being drowned out by the influx of new people who loved Cas' ass more than the music that they were producing, the ones that Balthazar was catering the shows for, instead of the people who actually wanted to listen to their music. Dean didn't verbally answer Cas but he did reach over for the bag of beef jerky and happily tucked in, the tension from his shoulders was visibly fading away.  _Thank god._ A part of Castiel didn't want to share an awkwardly silent car trip and he was thankful that Dean began to relax again, even to the point of resting his own hand on Cas' thigh with his thumb smoothing circles into the dark denim.

_Interesting._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Leave any comments that you have down below for me.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	29. Stone Cold Crazy

Dean could plead temporary insanity or Stockholm syndrome.  _He went willingly with Castiel though._ Whatever his explanation was going to be; he tried his best to ignore the blush that was creeping up the back of his neck and threatening to spill onto his cheeks from resting his hand on Cas' thigh.  _Insanity, definitely insanity._ The bag of beef jerky had been forgotten and now, sat between Dean's feet on the floor whilst the reporter tried to focus on entering Sam's number on the phone. _Cas wasn't kidding when he said that it was cheap._ The shape was remarkably similar to an IPhone but it was much denser in Dean's hand and the camera -  _much to Dean's disappointment -_ was less than good quality. Dean could remember 3 phone numbers off the top of his head: Gino's Pizzeria, Bobby's and Sam's. Once they were added to the new contact list and Dean was sure that Cas didn't want to play 20 questions again, he used both of his hands to type out a message to Sam.

 **Dean: 12:34pm:** Sam, this is my temporary number. Long story short - Old phone destroyed. Got a cheap replacement. 

The reply was almost instant, even for Sam and Dean had a sneaking suspicion that his brother was waiting for some sort of communication from him.  _Maybe it's because you've disappeared with Castiel Novak, Winchester._

 **Sam: 12:35pm:** How did you break your phone? You carry it around like a baby. 

That... wasn't an understatement. Dean has worked hard to be able to afford certain luxuries -  _such as the newest phone -_ and he took care in looking after them so he doesn't have to spend a fortune either replacing it or getting it fixed. Sam, however, was the complete opposite. The younger Winchester would haphazardly throw his things anywhere without a single care about them and it was one of the several things that annoyed Dean more than it probably should about Sam, especially when he would then complain about scratches or cracks on the screen.  _It was his own fault._

 **Dean: 12:37pm:** I wasn't the one who broke it, Bitch. 

Dean risked a glance over to Castiel who was concentrating on driving them safely to... To wherever the hell they were going next.  _A fast-food place hopefully._ His stomach had been quietly growling out of hunger and, yes, the jerky did help stop it for now but Dean was sure that it would start again soon. Dean would give anything to have a cheeseburger with a basket of curly fries.  _Or onion rings. Or both._ Vibrations from his new phone brought him back from the beginnings of the daydream and he stared down at the message in slight confusion. 

 **Sam: 12:42pm:** Was it Novak? 

Wait, did Dean tell Sam about the assignment? He had mentioned about a big opportunity that Bobby had given to him; covering a band for a limited issue but he definitely did not say who it was on. A deep crease formed between his brows as he continued to silently stare down at the phone screen. How the hell did Sam know? He spared another quick look to the driver and he could feel his heart begin to thump harder on the inside of his chest with nerves, a feeling that Dean definitely did not enjoy. 

 **Dean: 12:44pm:** How do you know that I'm with Novak? 

It did seem a little strange to use Cas' surname when referring to him but that wasn't the main subject of Dean's focus right now. He needed to know how Sam knew when Dean was certain that he didn't reveal to his little brother that he was accompanying Castiel Novak on tour. The last thing that Dean was expecting was Sam to send him a screenshot from an online article but, the second that he read over the headline, his heart still in his chest.  _No._

 **Sam: 12:47pm: NOVAK** **AND NEW BEAU?** _  
_

No. No. No. This wasn't happening.  _No._

"Pull over." 

Castiel looked away from the windshield to Dean in confusion at the sternness behind the reporter's voice and the expression deepened at the trembling of his hands whilst he clutched his phone.  _This wasn't happening. Not to me. No._

"Dean, are you..." 

"Just pull the fucking car over!" 

The rest of Cas' words were cut off by Dean's order and the singer followed it obediently; turning safely into a small lay-by before Dean practically leaps out the passenger side. His whole body was shaking from panic whilst his hands frantically combed through the longer strands of hair on the top of his head, tugging until there were small sparks of pain in an attempt to wake himself up. But this was real life.  _Fuck._

"Dean, what's wrong?" 

Castiel was slowly creeping towards him with both of his hands held up in surrender like Dean was a frightened animal, likely to snap or bite if approached too quickly.  _He might if Novak says anything about Dean panicking._ Dean didn't trust himself to speak without his voice shaking so he clumsily fished his phone out of his pocket and presented the screen to Cas, jaw tight and set. 

"Oh." 

 _Oh? That's all you have to say._ Dean took a couple of steps away from the singer, needing some space to breathe and, frankly, to stop himself from completely losing his shit at Novak. In the very back of his mind, Dean knew that he was slightly overreacting to a simple rumour that some no-name online magazine had started but what if this news reaches to everyone at home? What if Dad reads and believes it? _He would disown me for good._ If he was being completely honest, he wasn't entirely sure if that was a good or bad thing but Dean couldn't risk losing any of his family or possibly losing his job. Dean wasn't out to anyone apart from Sam and Jess and that was only confirmed after the both of them seeing him drunkenly making out with some guy at a bar.  _Not the best way to officially come out to your brother or his girlfriend._

“I still don’t understand why you’re freaking out about something like this, Dean. It’s just some gos…”

Again, Dean cut off Castiel before he could continue with a hard look, top lip twitching and it took a second until the singer’s confused expression changed into one of understanding. Cas had to live with things like this and, obviously, had become accustomed to different sources speculating about every aspect of his life, focusing very closely on his love life. Not to mention the fact that Dean was still  _very much_ in the closet with no plans of coming out publicly soon and he had a feeling that Castiel didn't exactly want to open up about his sexuality either. 

"Dean, I'm sorry." 

Castiel tentatively stepped towards Dean again, this time his hands were lowered and the singer hesitantly touched his waist before pulling Dean into a slightly awkward hug. The roar of traffic from the freeway kept him from sinking completely into the embrace but Dean did wind his own arms around Cas' shoulders to return the sentiment, his heart slowing back down to normal for now.  _Maybe it won't be that bad if Dad did find out that he was gay._ If on cue, Dean's stomach growled loudly between them and they broke apart with shy smiles before climbing back into the car. It seemed stiff and awkward again so Dean busied himself with typing out a reply to Sam, ignoring the movement of Castiel's head as the singer kept glancing over to him. 

 **Dean: 01:05pm:** Do NOT breathe a word to Dad otherwise I'm putting Nair in your shampoo next time that I'm visiting. 

It wasn't an empty threat and Dean would happily follow-through with it if Sam did say anything to John about the article or even being on tour with Novak. He knew that his father wasn't the most technological man in the world and there was a high chance that John would never see the that are seemingly plastered everywhere online. 

 **Sam: 01:07pm:** I won't say anything. 

Dean locked and pocketed his phone, the tension having faded from his system and he allowed himself to look over at Cas. The singer had his full attention on navigating through a series of roundabouts to reach a truck-stop but his fingers were drumming a beat on the edge of the steering wheel. 

"Are you out?" 

The three words had rolled off of Dean's tongue before he knew what he was asking and, by how Cas' hands tightened on the steering wheel, he caught the singer off-guard with the question. It was something that he had been curious about but stopped himself from asking too early. Their conversation in the cafe in Kansas had lead Dean to become curious about the singer's sexuality although he had a good idea about it already. 

"To a certain extent. Most of my siblings are aware of the fact that I'm gay although I'm not entirely sure if Meg accepts it." 

Ah, yes. Miss Meg Masters. During Dean's research, her "relationship" with Castiel had cropped up on several occasions but nothing seemed to be set in cement about them. Just a sparse collection blurry photographs of their arms around each other and false accounts from hotel staff about their wild "orgies" and being caught in the elevators. 

"We met whilst at school if you're curious." 

 _Damn it._ Dean must have been obviously taking too long to respond and now, Castiel was looking over at him with a raised eyebrow whilst waiting for the traffic light to turn green and his fingers kept tapping on the steering wheel. 

"Meg saw me crying one day and she tried to teach me an important lesson about people but I was still too young to understand it then." 

It was Dean's turn to raise an eyebrow but Castiel had turned away as the light had changed colour and the car behind them was close to threatening them with their horn if they didn't move. There were a few minutes of silence, not awkward or stiff but comfortable and safe. Cas was focusing more on the signs that were showing the way to the drive-thru and Dean leaned back in his seat, chewing on his bottom lip. 

"I want to be out but the consequences of it..." 

Again, Castiel nodded understandingly and turned left into the first window of the cliche drive-thru. The place was pretty small but they both ordered way too much for either of them to eat before pulling into a close parking spot to devour the burgers and fries. Dean had chosen both curly fries and onion rings along with a double cheeseburger and a large chocolate milkshake.  _Sam would have a seizure if he saw this._ Castiel had ordered the exact same apart from requesting normal fries and a large strawberry milkshake.  

"The consequences of coming out are always the scariest part and, if I knew for certain that the band wouldn't suffer a major loss to our fan-base then I would scream it from the nearest rooftop."

Cas was speaking around a mouthful of cheeseburger, moaning almost pornographically under his breath and it was taking every ounce of Dean's inner strength to not lean over the small space between them to kiss away the tiny speck of Mayo on the corner of the singer's lips.  _No._ He must stay professional. 

"It does scare me, the prospect of someone finding out or taking photographs of me whilst I'm in a... compromising position but I don't want to sacrifice my happiness any longer. Maybe once this tour is over..." 

The intended ending of that sentence was muffled by Castiel taking a bite of his burger but Dean could make an educated guess about the rest of his words. The singer was thinking about publicly coming out. It was admirable and there certainly would be support within the LGBT+ community for Castiel if he did indeed come out.  _Maybe Dean would have the same support._ It was a fleeting thought before Dean turned his attention to the sweetness of his milkshake to block any more of those dizzying thoughts out for now. 

"We should get back on the road." 

Dean wiped his greasy fingertips on a flimsy napkin before gathering their collective trash and getting out of the car for a brief second to stuff it into a plastic trash can then he returned to the passenger side, silently wishing that he could drive. That was definitely something that he already missed. Dean missed driving his baby; the echo of her rumbling engine and the small squeak to her doors brought a smile to his face. It had been too long since he was last behind The Impala's wheel.  _1967 Chevy Impala, to be more specific._ His imagination began to conjure images of Castiel spread out on Baby's hood and Dean would be...  _Oh._ Dean needed to stop that train of thought before the road-trip grew even more awkward but his mind kept filtering back to that image; the singer's pale skin a stark contrast against the Impala's black paint.  _He really needed to stop thinking about this._ Dean leant his forehead against the cool window to distract his mind from the explicit imagery that he couldn't tear his mind from and he tried to ignore Cas' hand that had sneaked over the space between them to rest on his thigh, thumb drawing random circles into his jeans. 

It was going to be a hard day. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comments in the comment-y bit.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	30. Meeting Across the River

It was the next day after a strangely peaceful night, curled up innocently together in some no-name motel for a few hours of sleep before they needed to get back on the road as they were due to re-join the rest of the band to perform a stadium gig in Salt-Lake City. They didn't have sex again; Dean simply spooned Castiel from behind and held him whilst they slept. He was awakened by the sweet feeling of the reporter scattering kisses over his bare shoulders and the nape of his neck, simply lazing around in bed to wake up fully then starting to get ready for the day. It was blissful. The only form of contact that the band had had in the last 2 or so days with Cas was a short phone conversation were Gabriel asked if he was planning to turn up. Of course, he was. He couldn't let their fans down. The singer was more than aware of the atrocious reputation that he had gained in the media for being a stubborn Prima Donna and, although he could be prissy on occasion, it was just a fictional image that someone formed around him and the rumours that had been splashed over any newspaper front. 

“What are you going to do about Balthazar when we get to the venue tonight?”

The reporter’s voice broke through the, somewhat, comfortable silence that tore Castiel's focus from the road for a second and he glanced over with an unsure shrug to his shoulder, turning his attention back to the windshield. He had absolutely no idea. Although Cas had done a few rebellious things in his life, some illegal and some more abiding to the law but, he had never truly run away from anything like this before. It was exciting and terrifying at the same time. He wanted nothing more than to stick with Dean on the road like this, yet Cas still had an obligation to the fans of the band and everyone who bought a ticket to see the show.

"I'll perform then I'll have to deal with him. I just hope that he isn't going to punish Crowley for stopping for us." 

Castiel gnawed anxious on his bottom lip with his thumbs tapping a random rhythm on the steering wheel to channel some of his energy in some way. He always got this fidgety before any show and he was slightly thankful that he was trapped in that tour bus with his brothers. Normally, he would tuck himself away in a far corner with his headphones firmly clamped over his ears while going over the set list for the night and trying to block out the antics of everyone else. But, right now, he could freely warm his voice up and not hide himself away. Cas didn't bother to glance over to Dean before humming through his nose, running through a full scale then running back down. Each time, he rises the higher tone that he hums and deepens the lower tone to help loosen his vocal cords. One by one, he ran through a variety of voice exercises with his eyes fixed on the road and hands still drumming on the wheel. 

"Where did you learn to do that?" 

"I had a music teacher that taught me a few exercises when I was younger. He let me spend the lunch periods in his office to practice and just... I don't know, hide." 

The singer explained with no hesitation as Dean scrawled unrecognisable words in his notepad. School was torture and Cas will forever be grateful for his music teacher - Mr. Ava - as he gave me a sanctuary to escape to, instead of having to face up to the boys who wanted to beat him for entertainment and practice singing, of course. It was a beautiful respite. Those years of torment were only brightened by those stolen moments of peace in that office and, sometimes, he wished that he could go back there. Only to sit in that peaceful spot. 

"I got my ass handed to me a lot back then, so I needed a space that I could go to without worrying if I was going to get my nose broken again." 

It was so strange. A couple of days ago, Castiel would have never said a single word about his painful experiences whilst growing up but, there was an ease when talking to Dean that he hadn't felt with any other reporter or anyone apart from Gabriel. He didn't trust anyone else apart from his older brother and, no matter how dumb it is, he was beginning to trust Dean too. Was he falling for the reporter? No, he couldn't be as it had only been 2 days.  _It had only been 2 days._

"I got beaten up too, but it's because I was a smart-ass with an attitude problem. I guess that I was living up to the reputation of my namesake." 

Both chuckle at the comment from Dean which manages to ease the tense atmosphere in the car and they settled in their seats again, simply enjoying the comfortable quiet for a moment. Cas could, somewhat, picture a younger-version of the reporter wearing a 'James Dean-Esque' leather jacket with a mischievous smirk that could make men and women weak at the knees, backchatting a teacher or even picking a fight with another student. Castiel would have become completely smitten with him and, honestly, he was starting to feel his heart flutter at the mere presence of the other man. There have always been stories of love at first sight or soul mates stumbling upon each other in the strangest of places, but this couldn't be the same thing. Could it? This was real life, not some cheesy rom-com with Meg Ryan although, to Cas, it was starting to feel like love already. 

The sky began to darken as the hours tick by; the car is still agreeably quiet apart from the near constant tapping from Castiel and he was lost in his own thoughts when he turns into the parking lot of the venue. It was absolutely packed already with the band's adoring fans. No matter how shitty the touring life is; Cas is always reminded that their fans are the most important part of it all. They deserved the best show possible tonight without the behind-the-scenes bullshit spilling onto the stage. A quick glance to the electronic clock on the dashboard revealed that the band should be ready to go, and he had, approximately, 10 minutes to get ready after negotiating his way passed security at the back door. 

"Into the lion's den..." 

Castiel muttered to himself as he parks the car in the closest available space with his hands tightening on the steering wheel before letting go and climbing out, seeing Dean following him out of the corner of his eye. This was it; he was walking back into the touring life. He was handing himself back to the devil for the fans. The singer kept a small amount of space between himself and Dean to ensure that no one can take any photographs that could raise more questions about the possibility of a relationship. He had to be Castiel Novak, Singer and Performer, now and not just Cas. He fishes his mobile phone from his pocket to call Gabriel to inform his older brother that he was outside with Dean and it takes a couple of minutes for Gabe to appear at the back door, smacking the singer on the back of the head before pulling him into a hug. 

"You should have kept driving, Kid. Let's head inside and start this shit-show." 

The pair broke away to allow the three men to walk inside of the venue with Dean and Castiel following Gabriel, their shoulders bumping together and random people staring at the sudden appearance of the singer again. God, was he going to be able to even deliver a half-good performance tonight? Vocally, he was going to be as good as any other night, but in terms of his performance, he might seem to be out of it. No. Cas needed to make sure that this was a show to remember for positive reasons. Did he had enough time to change into something more appropriate to wear? Probably not. Did he need to warm up? No, he did the exercises in the car. Did he need to use the bathroom? No unless he faces down Balthazar before he goes on stage. 

"The set is the same apart from Feather of a Crow and The Joker's Grin have been swapped for some dumbass reason. Just look at me and I'll give you a prompt of which song..." 

"Castiel fucking Novak!" 

A recognisable bellow cut off the rest of Gabriel's words and the three men turned on their heel to see Balthazar marching towards them with a fire in his eyes. The manager was beyond pissed at the prodigal son's return and the singer was, definitely, in trouble. Dean could do nothing more than stand there silently whilst Balthazar screamed at Castiel about sneaking off in the middle of the night and, possibly, kidnapping a reporter in the process too. He attempted to say that he willingly went with him, but Gabriel placed a hand on his shoulder to hold him back from interrupting the tongue-lashing. The singer did not flinch at all which was some sort of a miracle although he suspected that Cas had been on the receiving end of a verbal lashing like this before; the other man simply stood there with his arms at his sides and his gaze fixed on the wall just behind Balthazar. Dean wondered how many times the singer had to be reprimanded like this; there were a variety of stories floating around the internet about the Novak boys and he imagined that many them were fake or extreme exaggerations of the truth.

“What the fuck were you thinking? I was about to call the fucking FBI to drag your sorry ass back here whether you want to be here or not. Do you know what would have happened if you didn't come back? I would have been blamed for your disappearance and I would have been fucking hauled off to San Quentin." 

There was still no reaction from Castiel until, finally, Balthazar took a breath and his younger brother turned his gaze away from the wall to stare down the slightly shorter man, jaw set and firm. Was he going to throw a punch? Gabriel's hand, that had stayed on Dean's shoulder for the last moment or so, fell away to prepare himself to drag Cas away from Balthazar if he does decide to physically react instead of verbally. 

"Are you done? I have to get on stage." 

That was it. 9 simple words. That was the only reaction from the singer before he walked away towards the backstage area to discuss the set with Samandriel, leaving the three men standing frozen in place in complete shock and confusion at the lack of response from Cas. It was Gabriel who broke the trance with a bark of laughter and walked away to get ready for the performance, Dean quickly following him as not to be left alone with Balthazar for too long. Even from back here behind the heavy soundproof curtains, there was a low thrum of excitement that was radiating from the audience about seeing their favourite band perform. If he was being honest, Dean was excited about seeing the Rebellious Garrison do what they do best; put on a show.  

"Band to stage! 3 minutes!" 

Someone with a headset called out and Samandriel, Gabriel then Meg filed out to take their places at their instruments whilst Castiel turned to grin over to Dean, beckoning him closer as the spotlights dimmed completely and there was a small roar from the crowd. The buzz of anticipation was intoxicating, and the reporter could feel his own knees weaken at the feeling as he grew closer to the actual stage. Cas glanced over his shoulder before wrapping his arms around Dean's waist to pull him flush against him with their mouths finding each other, knowing that no one could see them after the lights had been dampened in readiness for the spotlights to enlighten each member of the band and the singer himself. The kiss was firm with a desperate edge; Dean's hands fisting the other man's hair and their hips clumsily bumping together. It was such a switch in either of their demeanours for this moment that it was dizzying and stunning in a positive sense of the word. 

"60 seconds!" 

Castiel grumbles against Dean's mouth before pulling away to breathe as both men gaze at each other hungrily, the corner of the singer's mouth quirking upwards in a soft smile and he, strangely, brushed the back of his hand lightly over the other man's cheek to feel the faint blush that was staining the tops of his cheeks. What was really happening between them? There was an underlying tension that neither of them wanted to acknowledge in fear that they would ruin whatever was starting to blossom for the men. 

"Enjoy the show, Mr. Winchester." 

After another breath-stealing kiss that left the reporter grasping at Castiel's hips to draw him closer; the singer winked before striding onto the stage without a second look to Dean to position himself in front of Gabriel's drumkit with his back to the audience and head hung low. He was set and ready. Every light was, now, off to leave the stage in complete darkness and his heart stilled at the first slow beat from the drums, a recognisable voice rumbling through the speakers. 

"We are forlorn like children, and experienced like old men, we are crude and sorrowful and superficial - I believe we are lost." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comments below for me.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	31. Killing Me Softly

This is where Castiel belongs; on stage in front of an adoring crowd, soaring with his heart pounding in time with the music and his body revelling in the adrenaline rush from singing. He was flying around the stage and the roar from the audience was carrying him with their cries, cheers and their own voices singing along at the top of their lungs. It was his true home. It must seem strange to anyone who didn't perform how much comfort that was found whilst on a stage in front of a few thousand people, but he did find some strange enjoyment about being here and surrounded by fans like this. It was the acceptance of Cas being Cas that cemented his love for the fans. They really did love him with no conditions apart from singing which was something that he loved doing anyway. There was a slight dip before the melancholy chords of ‘Feather of a Crow’ rang throughout the stadium as Cas dragged a stool to the front of the stage and smiled, almost, tiredly at the first couple of rows of people that he could see against the bright lights. They had no real idea just how exhausted it was being Castiel Novak. 

"How are you guys tonight? You're certainly one of the best crowds that we've ever had." 

There were a few cries in response to the question and a quiet chuckle bubbled in the singer's chest, waving at a few of the fans who were the closest to the edge of the stage with a barrier holding them back. Castiel often wondered if they would invade the stage if the barriers weren't there and, after talking to Gabriel about it, they ensured him that it was for his own security to have the rails there. _Maybe they could risk it in a smaller venue._ All these thoughts were constantly brewing at the outer edges of his mind whilst he was performing, and he could lose himself in his own ideas as he sang through the more familiar songs.

_Could he ever really give this up?_

It's not the first or, probably, the last time that the question that crossed the singer's mind and the answer was the always the same. _No_. He couldn't let the fans down by retiring although he did wish that he could take a break from everything for a month or so. Just enough time to catch up on sleep with a handsome man in his bed for the entire time. The inner-monologue was working through the normal thoughts that crossed his mind during the slower songs and, out of slight curiosity, Castiel glanced over to the side of the stage to find Dean staring in amazement at him. Maybe he could convince the reporter to spend some more quality time with him at his place in Maine. The house itself was in a secluded area, allowing him to walk out onto the balcony and relish in the complete silence of the place. That's why he purchased the home in the first place; it was a home base to regroup and relax between tours; it was a sanctuary, especially as it was simply his and his alone. 

It was only when the gentle strumming of the guitar behind Cas stopped and the audience broke out in a loud roar that the singer turned back to gaze at the crowd again, a sly smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. It was like a switch inside of his head was flipped as the singer jumped from the chair whilst the heavier opening chords of the next song began, and Cas hurriedly pulled the stool to the back of the stage again, mentally hyping himself for the higher energy number.  _I can't let them down._ If he was being completely honest with himself, Cas loathed the possibility of being a disappointment to their fans or, even, the rest of the Rebellion Garrison. 

"Thank you so much! We'll catch you on the flip side soon!" 

Castiel's entire back was coated in a fine sheen of sweat from the spotlights when, finally, he could walk off stage to the rampant screams of the crowd after the encore songs. He was still soaring on the adrenaline rush and there was an excited buzz underneath his skin when he catches sight of the reporter again, chewing on the insides of his cheeks to resist the urge to pull him into a tight embrace. There were cameras trained on him right now. Balthazar was already by his side to discuss the next gig in Las Vegas in a couple of days, but Cas couldn't hear him as his focus was drawn to Dean walking on the other side of him and their shoulders bumped against each other. He needed to get the journalist somewhere a little more private away from prying eyes. He had to come back down to Earth. 

"Cassie, are you coming back on the bus?" 

"No." 

Surprisingly, Balthazar didn't argue with the singer's answer although his older brother and the journalist shared a slightly concerned look with each other at how disassociated Cas was now after being so present on stage. _Space. He needed space._ There were thousands of voices melting together and enveloping him, a knot of anxious energy sitting painfully behind his sternum at the suffocating atmosphere of backstage. Flashes from their cameras were agonizingly blinding and Castiel was losing himself in the frantic environment. This is the main reason why he, normally, ran from the stage straight to the bus at the end of a gig. It took a second for the singer's mind to hone on the deep rumble of Dean's voice beside him as the reporter was politely asking random people to move out of their way when they make their way outside and the two of them to head back to the car together again. It was grounding to have someone stable like Dean. 

"You killed it tonight, Cas." 

"I know..." 

The singer's voice was hesitant, and he nodded to Dean's words as they clambered into the car - the journalist behind the wheel for the first time - and Castiel fidgeted in the passenger seat at the sight of flood of headlights from the other vehicles in the parking lot. He needed away from here. It was, almost, as if the journalist read his mind or simply noticed how anxious Cas was acting about being here so he managed to get onto the road as quickly as possible without cutting anyone else off and the steady thrum of the engine was soothing.  _I did it._ It seemed so strange that the excitable energy that Cas had whilst on stage turned into almost crippling anxiety from the very second that he took a step off that stage as he had to fall into reality. The notion of finding himself in a different world whilst performing always confused him, but there was something real about it at the same time and, to some extent, Castiel along with Gabriel really did believe that they created their own safe universe on stage. It was secure and accepting. A whole hour passed before Castiel spared a glance over to Dean with the anxious feeling settling for the moment and he risked reaching over to gently squeeze the reporter's knee, turning his gaze back to the darkened scenery. There was a faint sour taste at the back of his mouth about how he 'zoned out' and Dean was left to deal with the frenzied pack of different people that swarmed them. It was just... Claustrophobic. 

"Can you pull over, please?" 

The car rolled to a gentle stop on the side of the dirt road with the taillights of the vehicle in front of them disappearing after a moment and both men sat in the quiet until Castiel shyly reached over the central console to tenderly cradle Dean's face between his palms. The journalist leaned into the soft touch and shuffled closer to rest their foreheads together as Cas brushed his left thumb along the line of the other man's cheekbone. Quiet. Peaceful.  _Safe._ This was a slightly unexpected change to the dynamic of their relationship. Before, it was simply about acting on attraction and lust then something different began to grow under the surface that lead to them holding each other last night without having sex first. It couldn't be that word, right? _You know... L.O.V.E._ Nope. It couldn't be that. 

"Thank you for dealing with... all of this. I know that it can be a little jarring at first." 

"It's alright, Cas. Are you feeling okay?" 

_I don't know._

The words didn't make it pass Castiel's lips as, instead, he leaned forward to softly kiss Dean in hopes of distracting the taller man and there was a faint smile tugging at the corner of Cas' mouth at the feeling of the journalist raising his own hands to place them on his waist. It wasn't a move and he wasn't trying to take it any further than sharing a kiss for now. If the singer was being completely honest with himself, he didn't want to push it beyond this right now. All he needed was something to ground him and Castiel just wanted to savour this still moment between them. A slight blush was staining the tops of Dean's cheeks when they eventually break apart from each other with their hands staying in their respected places and both men didn't move from fear of breaking whatever this was turning into until Cas felt the itch in his body to drive, glancing towards the steering wheel. There was a freedom about driving that was remarkably mirrored in performing; both of which managed to calm and soothe him. 

"Can I drive please, Dean?" 

It was a simple request and the reporter nodded his head before climbing out of the driver's door to allow them to switch seats then Castiel is starting the engine again to return back on the road to Las Vegas for the next gig. The air in the car was still a little... uneasy. _Not uncomfortable, just uneasy._ It didn't relax until Dean leaned over to turn the radio onto a low volume then, slightly unexpectedly, he turned it up as he recognised the song with an amused smile lifting the corners of his mouth. What was this song? Cas' eyebrows inched closer together whilst he tried to place the song then it clicked in his mind and his confused expression morphed into one of recognition instead.  _Eagles._ A flood of memories of hearing Glenn Frey's voice vibrating through Gabriel's aged speakers and the singer could practically smell the thick layers of dust in his older brother's bedroom, a place that he was allowed to hide away in after a rough day at school. It was - along with the music room - a sanctuary where he was allowed to be unashamedly him without the worry of judgement or rejection. Dean had a decent voice and Castiel couldn't help smiling wider than necessary at the low rumble that accompanied the original track, the singer's tapping in time on the top of the steering wheel. 

_"Life in the fast lane... Surely make you lose your mind... Life in the fast lane..."_

Neither of them saw it coming.

Maybe things would be different if they weren't so busy caught in the light-heartened moment. Either Cas was speeding or the terrain of the road changed suddenly without him managing to notice in time or the road was slippery from rain. It didn't really matter how it happened. One second, they were joyfully singing along with the radio and grinning at the positive upswing to the atmosphere. _They were happy._ The next, the car was rolling on the compacted ground on the side of the road before it stilled upside down on top of its roof with the horn blaring although neither men were touching the steering wheel anymore. Both of them were still with their seatbelts holding them securely in their seats as their arms limply hang past their heads and wrists pressed against the unusually close roof. 

" _They were rushing down that freeway... Messed around and got lost... They didn't care, they were just dyin' to get off..."_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you so much for reading! 
> 
> Please leave any comments below for me.  
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


	32. I'm Only Sleeping

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lil warning - There are description and talk of injuries in this chapter.  
> If that ain't your thing then give this one a skip.  
> <3 
> 
>  
> 
> Ps. There is a little switch between POVs here too because I wanted to try something new.

_"Get those cameras away from here!"_

_"We need to take the driver first!"_

_"Possible neck injuries!"_

There were different coloured lights bleeding through Dean's eyelids as foreign hands ran over his chest and a multitude of voices were melding into one murmur around him.  _What the fuck happened?_ The last thing that he remembers is Castiel and himself arriving at the venue for the gig then Gabriel meeting them at the backstage door before... Well, nothing. His mind was filled with static instead of the memories of what happened a couple of hours ago. Maybe they got drunk.  _No._ If that were true then he would be laying in the plush covers of a hotel room and not the cold terrain of something like a road, the fingers of his left hand twitching by his side to feel the surface. It was definitely a road, but how did he get here and where the hell was Cas? Maybe they got jumped or something. 

"Sir, can you tell me your name?" 

One of the voices broke free from the rest to ring clearly in his ears and the hands moved to hold the sides of his face, Dean's top lip twitching in a sharp pain from his left temple. He was never great at dealing with any sort of pain. It takes a second for his body to respond to his internal command and his eyes cracked open, an unfamiliar female dressed in a paramedic's uniform looming above him with a concerned look to her face. The worried expression wasn't for him - _oh no_ \- it was for the recognisable figure that they were carefully rolling onto a spinal board along with a brace wrapped securely around his neck. 

"Cas?" 

Dean muttered to himself as the movement of talking sent tiny flares of pain through his jaw, not to mention to medic's strong hold on his head and the brighter white flashes coming from somewhere. Another set of hands returned to his ankles and, finally, the woman looked down at Dean again, moving her hands to his shoulders instead of the sides of his face. The only other time that he has ever blacked out then completely forgotten what happened when he became conscious again was after falling off his bike when he was 10 and spraining my wrist in the process. Dad was angry for 2 weeks and got rid of his bike too. 

"Sir, you've been in an accident... I need to know your name." 

Dean's eyes widen at the mention of an accident, but his eyebrows narrowed in confusion as he has no memory of it and he holds himself back from accusing the woman of lying to him when he does a body check of himself. Every inch of him was throbbing in pain, especially his left wrist and the upper half of his torso.  _Fuck._ It was all he could think of - apart from the fact that Bobby was going to kill him - as he was pulled onto his side as the grip on his ankles left whilst a board was pushed underneath Dean's body then he was rolled onto his back. Once again, the female paramedic appeared in his line of vision and tentatively placed a piece of gauze to his temple, securing it with small lengths of tape. 

"D-Dean... My name is Dean Winchester." 

A low grunt came from the journalist as he was unexpectedly hauled into the air and carried across the street to the waiting gurney, his breath stolen when he steals a glimpse at the car. It was completely wrecked and resting on its roof. Dean's mind was still filled with snow over the exact reasoning behind the accident although there was no doubt now that him and Cas were in a car crash together that left both men needing immediate medical attention. He would never openly admit this to anyone, but Dean was seriously beginning to worry about what state the singer was in after seeing the ruined vehicle.  _Was he okay?_

 

~ ~ ~ 

 

The paramedics were buzzing around Cas whilst he calmly stared up at the roof of the ambulance, his left eye swollen shut and his neck rigid due to the brace keeping it in place. It seemed bizarre that he felt so grounded after a traumatic incident like this, but there was no panic and no worry apart from Dean's physical condition. That did worry him in this moment of time. The singer kept replaying it, over and over again in his head to figure out what exactly happened to cause the car to flip then land upside down. Maybe it was due to him speeding or hitting a rough patch of tarmac in the road. He wished that he could say that this was the first time that a night of a gig ended with him in the back of an ambulance, but he wasn't one for lying and most of the tabloids already knew about those incidences too. It would either be a fight at a club or Castiel's brothers would be at each other's throats - mainly Balthazar and Gabriel - which always left him with a blooded nose or a chipped tooth when a punch missed its intended target. 

"Mr. Novak, we're just arriving at Sunrise Hospital. Your friend will be here in a few minutes." 

Cas breathes a small sigh of relief as he unclenches his hands by his sides and allows his good eye to close for a moment in knowledge that Dean was being cared for at the same hospital. He needed to apologize when, and if, he sees the reporter. It would be completely understandable if Dean never wanted to see Castiel again after tonight, but the singer did want to make sure that he did give the journalist his sincerest apologies before he is totally cut off from communicating with him. He was brought out of his thoughts by the back of the ambulance being thrown up then he was being carted through to the emergency treatment centre with a gaggle of nurses rushing to the sides of the gurney, their voices overlapping each other's as they ask a flurry of different questions. 

 _"How long was his unconscious for?"_ _  
_

_"How much morphine was he given at the scene?"_ _  
_

_"Any complains about numbness or pins and needles?"_

God, Cas hated hospitals. There were always noisy and frantic with the frantic energy as well as the unforgettable stench of too-strong bleach that was used to sanitise everything. 

“Our patient is Castiel Novak. 26 years old and involved in a single-vehicle accident along with another male where the car rolled, possible several times before stopping on the roof. Castiel was driving and wearing his seat belt, but when we arrived on the scene, the passenger had already cleared him from the wreckage. He complained of pain located in his left orbit and swelling around the same area indicates a possible fracture to the eye socket. There are several bruises stretching along his...”

The louder man's voice soon faded into the background along with the murmur of other people speaking in the room and Cas felt the burning of unshed tears in both of his eyes, his bottom lip giving a threatening wobble too. _Don't let these people see you cry, Castiel._ Michael's harsh voice echoed inside of his head and his hands twisted in the rough hospital sheets, trying to stop himself from sobbing at the realisation. Dean had, somehow, dragged him out of the car. All he wanted to do was weep at the kindness of the journalist and he silently prayed to anyone who could be listening to him that Castiel would be allowed to see Dean again to thank him then apologise for everything. Sneaking off the bus, leaving him in the hotel room and crashing the car. It was all his fault. 

"Mr. Novak. Is there anyone that you want us to contact for you?" 

 _Fuck._ A part of Castiel wanted to call Michael as that was the norm when things went desperately wrong; he would run back to Michael and his eldest brother would comfort him in a slightly distant way. Not cold or unfeeling, just not as close as some of his other brothers would be with him. Maybe Michael isn't the best person for right now. 

"My brother Gabriel, please." 

Gabriel was, almost, the opposite of Michael when it came to comforting Cas in times of trouble and, most of the time, it's what he wanted. All he needed right now was someone close to him to assure him that he hadn't destroyed his and Dean's career by getting them in a wreck. This isn't the way that he wanted to end his career and he never wanted to end someone else's career prematurely either. 

~ ~ ~ 

 

Dean loathes hospital. It was the overwhelming stench of bleach - or some other sanitizer - that they use to clean everything that burns the insides of his nostrils and leaves an uneasy feeling in his stomach, not to mention the fact that people came to hospitals to die too. That fact gave the entire building an ominous feeling to it and, especially at this time of night, it was surprisingly quiet. The last time that he was ever in a hospital when Sammy managed to dislocate his elbow whilst wrestling with some kid from school and Dean had to take him to the emergency department to get checked out then given a special sling for the next month and a half.

Dad was unbelievably pissed. 

The journalist had been moved to a ward after every inch of his body was X-Rayed to discover that he had a broken collarbone, a sprained wrist - that was resting in a sling across his chest - and a cracked rib along with a mild concussion which, the doctor explained, is why he couldn't remember the initial accident. The area of the ward itself was plain and simple except from a couple of health posters on the walls and a small Television that was mounted in the top corner opposite his bed along with large blue curtains that could provide some privacy when needed. The only thing that the TV was playing were old reruns of Wheel of Fortune. Beautifully mind-numbing television to distract him from the dulled ache in the higher section of his torso. 

"Hello Mr. Winchester." 

The on-duty nurse offered Dean a bright smile when she came to stand at the end of his bed, checking over his patient file with a small crease appearing between her eyebrows and her pen caught in-between her lips. Maybe something was wrong or it was simply her face when she was reading. Another thought crossed his mind when he glanced over to the closed curtains around the bed opposite him that kept Castiel safe from sight and any stray photographers that managed to sneak past the security guards. The singer had been brought up from having tests done a few minutes after Dean, but the curtains had been immediately drawn around him and the journalist hadn't seen him since them. He seemed to be okay apart from the obvious cast on his leg and patch over his left eye. 

"Do you have any pain anywhere? Shortness of breath, dizziness or drowsiness?" 

"No." 

The nurse - Dean couldn't read her nametag from her - scribbled more notes across the page before closing the folder then offering a short smile and walking out of sight again. He waited for a minute to ensure that she was really gone to swing his legs over the side of the bed and stand with his good arm holding onto the edge of the mattress for support, his legs taking a second to adjust to his weight again.  _Woah, Morphine is strong._ It takes a few tries for Dean to be able to stand up without wobbling then he shuffles over to the curtained area and he hesitantly peers into the small space. Castiel is still awake and he looks... Upset? Pissed off? It was a little difficult to accurately read the singer’s expression due to his eye being patched up and the effects of the morphine on Dean’s processing complex. Maybe Cas just had a resting bitch-face.

"Hey." 

 

~ ~ ~ 

 

"Hey." 

Castiel blinks out of his trance to notice that Dean is standing there instead of Gabriel, but the singer nods and vaguely waves to allow the journalist to step into his little cordoned off space. It was slightly claustrophobic with the curtains surrounding him on all sides. The lack of sound, also, was unnerving although he always thought that he wanted a quiet and all enclosed space to himself like this, but it turns out that silence could be rather daunting. Cas watches Dean through his uncovered eye as he pads slowly then slumps down in the plastic chair beside the hospital bed and, for the first time, he can take a real look at the visible injuries that the Journalist sustained in the accident. 

"How are you doing, Dean?" 

He couldn't deny the tug at his heart when Dean listed through all of this injuries and Cas' right eye began to sting with brewing tears that threatened to spill onto his cheek. Castiel could have killed them both. A hard lump rose in the back of his throat whilst his bottom lip was trembling as he held back the flood of thoughts and emotions that rushed to the forefront of his consciousness. He shyly reached over the space between the bed and the chair to hold onto Dean's good hand, not lifting his gaze from his own lap as he gently squeezed the singer's fingers. 

"I-I'm sorry about everything. I... I sh-should have let you drive and, maybe, we wouldn't be here." 

The mattress dipped as Dean switched from sitting in the chair to perching next to Castiel's left knee; dropping the singer's hand to carefully cup the side of his face with his thumb wiping away the stubborn tears from Cas' cheek and pecking the tiniest of kisses to the very end of his nose. A small chuckle bubbles in Castiel's chest before Dean carefully wrapped him in his arms and both men allowed themselves to be comforted by each other. This was a clear demonstration of the change between them again as, when they first met, they would either ignore the other man or press each other against the nearest flat surface. However, it was different now and there was something more hiding below the surface that neither of them was ready to acknowledge yet. Not yet. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading as always! 
> 
> If you have any comments, please leave them down below for me.  
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS
> 
> Ps. I changed it because I hated how short the chapter was - Just a lil FYI


	33. Handle With Care

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gabriel's POV

Gabriel wasn't expecting the call.

He was still busy helping the crew with clearing away his drum kit when his phone rang in his back pocket. The number appeared as 'unknown' and, normally, he would simply dismiss the call, but there was an uneasy feeling settling in his stomach that told him to answer it. Everything stopped. The female voice informed him about the accident with Castiel and - what's his name? - the reporter, the drumsticks in his left hand dropping to the ground by his feet. He didn't even think about it before he grabbed a set of keys out of the pocket of one of the stage hands then ran out to his car, mobile still pressed to his ear and heart thudding painfully against his ribs. The nurse didn't disclose the severity of their injuries, but Cas wouldn't have asked for them to call Gabe if something wasn't wrong unless he simply wanted his older brother there with him. Throughout his childhood, Castiel only reached out to Gabriel when he needed to be comforted or he wanted some company and, it seemed to him, that it was continuing well into his adulthood. Some habits are harder to break than others or however the saying goes.  Hell, he was always the one that tried to keep his brothers from ripping each other's throats out apart from Lucifer and Michael; he never dreamt of stepping between them when they were having an argument as Gabe knew better.

It takes Gabriel 18 and a half minutes to get to the hospital. 

There was a gaggle of reporters obstructing the entrance when he pulled into the parking lot and Gabe took a deep breath before attempting to go inside, pushing his way through the throng of people throwing questions at him. They were vultures looking for the latest scrap of information that they could exaggerate and spin into a story, even further tarnishing the Novak name. Mostly, they were trying to ruin Castiel. 

"Was your brother on drugs whilst he was behind the wheel?" 

"Is he still alive?" 

"Is this a cover-up for another drug overdose?" 

_No. I don't know. Go fuck yourself._

Gabriel wanted nothing more than the chance to snap at them, but Castiel needed him right now and he wasn't going to spend a minute of his time entertaining the mad illusions that they fabricate for their own gain. It was, in his own opinion, one of the worst things about being in the public eye. Thankfully. Gabe kept his private life exceedingly private to the point of the press giving up trying to find anything on him and, in fact, the same goes for Samandriel. The youngest of the brothers hardly spoke to anyone except for Gabriel and Castiel as he was scared about something private being leaked to the press then blown up on every newspaper in the world. A slight exaggeration of what would more likely happen, but the logic was sound ,and Gabe wasn't going to correct his little brother's thinking after so long. 

"Hi. I'm Gabriel Novak, here to see Castiel Novak." 

After a short conversation with the receptionist; Gabriel was instructed to the ward that both men were on and he made his way up there, ignoring the insistent buzzing of his phone in his pocket. It was, probably, Balthazar screaming for him to get back to the bus. The ward is pretty quiet when he walks out of the elevator and he pads softly, as not to disturb the silence, over to the nurse's desk where they point him to the second room that he passed. Gabe says a quiet 'thank you' then he makes his way over to the correct room, slipping through the door then shuffling over to the closed off area.  _Of course, they would shut him off from the rest of the world._ It was a small shock when he pulled aside the curtain to find the journalist - Gabriel still couldn't remember his name - laying on his back with Castiel cradled to his chest and his arms tightly wound around his little brother. He thought that it was simply a sexual rebellion thing for Cas, but there must be more below the surface and he wouldn't deny that he was happy to see that Castiel had found something more in another person. He did, however, hope that this wasn't a single-road thing that ended in his brother getting his heartbroken or vice versa.

"How's he doing?"

Gabriel drew the curtains behind him as he shuffled over to the plastic chair, perching on the very edge of the seat and casting a worried glance over the cast that covered the majority of Castiel's right leg. For a second, he simply watched the steady rise and fall of Cas' chest to reassure himself that his little brother was still breathing and still, very much, alive. He had no idea what he would have done if the worst had happened to Castiel.

"He fell asleep about an hour ago. His eye-socket is fractured, and he broke his right femur. Plus, a bunch of bruising on his chest from the seatbelts.

Although Gabriel hadn't had the chance to spend much time with... _Um, Dan? Don? Dean!_ Although he hasn't spent much time with Dean, he could already tell that the other man genuinely cared for Castiel and there didn't seem to be an ulterior motive to becoming close to his younger brother. There was a tiny voice in the back of Gabe's head that was still suspicious about Dean, but he could only give them time together and, if shit did hit the fan then he would support Cas and contemplate murdering the journalist.  

"How are you doing?" 

If Dean was going to stick around for a while which, despite the doubt in his head, Gabriel believed he was going to stick by Castiel then he wanted to ensure that the journalist had another Novak sibling on their side. Lord knows that Michael and Balthazar are not going to, exactly, approve of their relationship and rumours will only grow with time too. It might be too late to stop the spread of rumours already, but there were steps that they could take to keep them at a minimum and avoid any real scandals. Dean only nodded his head in response to Gabe's question as he ran his fingers through the longer strands of Cas' hair and gently brushed the ends away from the singer's forehead, his demeanour relaxed, but protective at the same time. Gabriel opened his mouth to say something when his phone blared again in his pocket and the older Novak stood from his chair to take the call outside of the room, swiping his thumb across the screen once he was out in the corridor. It was Balthazar. He almost hoped that it would be Michael so it would show that his eldest brother, somewhat, cared about Cas except for making him more money and acting like a dancing monkey on stage who could be controlled with peanuts. However, this was Michael Novak and the man hadn't spoken to Gabe in the past 6 months, so his expectations were basement-level low. 

"Where the fuck are you, Gabriel!" 

"Oh, no hello? That's rude Balthy." 

The corner of Gabriel's lips twitched in a faint smile at the frustrated groan coming through the phone as he wandered down the hall to another empty room and slipped inside for some privacy, knowing that this conversation wasn't going to end well or quietly. 

"Gabriel, where are you? The roadies had to tell me that you ran off after some phone call..." 

"Turn on the news, Little Brother." 

There was a cold edge to Gabe's voice from the anger of Balthazar not knowing or paying attention enough to realise that Castiel had been in an accident as it was, probably, plastered on every news outlet. Maybe Gabe was being a little overdramatic as Cas was fine, but he couldn't help it and he wasn't going to make an attempt to change his protectiveness over his little brother. 

"Before you ask, he's fine and no, he's not finishing the tour." 

"Gabriel, think about..." 

"I don't give a shit, Balthazar! Castiel almost lost his life tonight, not to mention that he has a broken leg so he physically can't finish the tour. He is broken and tired, so as soon as he's out of here then he's going home for some fucking rest. You're running him into the ground and, honestly, I need a break too. Everyone does before we kill each other on that fucking bus." 

Gabriel hung up with a hard press to his screen and he simply stood in the centre of the empty room, taking a deep breath to calm the frantic pounding of his heart in his ears. It was more than overdue that they had a break from touring and, although the circumstances weren't ideal, this was the perfect time for them to get some actual rest. A warm bed, a soft pillow and Kali fast asleep by his side was everything that Gabe wanted instead of wedging himself in a cramped bus seat with Samandriel kicking the back of his seat in his sleep. Kali, Gabriel's long-term girlfriend, had been pestering for the last month or so for more time together than the odd night in random hotel rooms and he wanted more too. Gabe wanted a home that he could call his own with her and build a home-base that was always going to be there when he finished a gig or a tour. This was going to be good for the band. Well, he hoped that it was going to be good for them. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you as ever for reading, Lovelies. 
> 
> If you have any comments, leave them in the comment-y section.   
> Love ya! 
> 
> MTS


End file.
